People, especially girls, just tell me “do you even have friends” or “you’re weird”
A giel that I got her snap from told me via text “oh you have friends” when I told her “I am with a friend” like why the fuck would you assume I don’t have friends, I thought this aura thing is bullshit but now I believe it
What can I do to get rid of this? I already lift
And the fact that people find me awkward when I speak to them, but just act friendly and then keep it at that conversation + me having done everything in my life alone so not having experienced things I can talk about doesn’t help either
Please, what are the best things I can do to fix this problem?
pocketroxx 2y ago
"me having done everything in my life alone.." Sounds like you actually dont have friends.
I dont think your problem is necessaily "weird aura" as much as it is in the low self-esteem territory. Chances are you have been isolating and became socially awkward and have a sheltered vibe. This can be anything to your energy, vibe, clothing. Some people just have a "Ive been homeschooled" nerdy look genetically, so this could be it too.
If not, just slowly start actually having friends and your energy will change. Its like this, you catch some fish and suddenly youll carry yourself like a fisherman. You fix cars and youll have some mechanic blue collar vibe about you. You get into sales and youll become outgoing and confident.
TLDR; You are coming across as a extreme beta/omega loser to these girls.
miserabletogreat 2y ago
Yeah, I don't have friends - I mean I have some people that I can speak to but they don't act like I am a friend or something so I don't count them
Yeah, I've been isolated my whole life, once I moved I didn't want to get out so I just stayed home and played games, I came back from school and played games, ate, homework, back to bed and repeat, this caused me not being able to speak to anyone unless it was needed like at work, or when I went to the doctor,
I don't have a nerdy look and now I go along with clothes etc like the "normal" people, not trying to praise myself but once I got a normal haircut instead of fucking buzzcutting it each time I go to a barber, let some facial hair grow and bought some normal clothes, girls look at me A LOT (not trying to praise myself lol) so I kind of fixed thatt hing but the energy/vibe thingy is so damaged, and I am aware when it happens but I just can't fix something instantly that was caused 18 years long
Is having friends really the only solution? I don't want to have them and I don't care about not having them, and I actually can get along with guys pretty wel but meeting new ones is ofc difficult
pocketroxx 2y ago
Yeah man its extremely simple. You need to get friends. What if you meet the girl of your dreams and she gives you a chance (sounds like you are a loser so this is the realistic context) ... She will quickly find out you have no friends and DIP... its a huge smv killer. Theres exceptions like if you moved to a new city or whatever.
You should start building friendships with men. Become accustomed to it. Like even if it means hanging out with other socially awkward losers too.. at least in the beginning stages. But push for real friendship, someone you can count on and have fun with and have their back. Vice versa. not just acquantainces.
If you want a high value women you will need friends. She will meet them one day or basically find out youre a hermit and dip, even if youre attractive. They would prefer an average guy with friends than a hot hermit.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
Um wut
You're asking how to get rid of the aura and perception that you don't have friends but you ACTUALLY DON'T have friends
Breh
miserabletogreat 2y ago
Tbh, not even that, I don't care about not having friends or people noticing that, I meant to say that it's in fact possible to pick up on that while not saying anything about it
I just want to get rid of the awkward aura, but what the fuck do you have to change for that
[deleted] 2y ago
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MidgetSpinner 2y ago
Videoing yourself talking can be awkward anyway. So would be difficult to judge.
EurasianChad 1 2y ago
There must be something wrong in your communication that's coming across as too far out of the norm, and not in a cool/rebellious way.
Just keep talking to people but record yourself on your phone so you can see your mannerisms. Maybe you're actually really weird.
MrSupreme 2y ago
Girls are gonna want to be eventually assimilated into your lifestyle,and having a social circle,friends,hobbies and an interesting life is what they want to get out of fucking you and maybe a ltr.
Don't feel like a clown for trying to improve all of that, but don't use women as a point of origin for that either. Women should be collateral, you enjoying your Interesting life is number one.
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
Ok. Here's the thing. If people SAY that, it is probably very, very true.
Aura is bullshit, but people are kinda aware of other people.
It's mostly a personality thing, especially your movements, voice, what you say, and so on.
Based on what? What they say?
People always act friendly. People don't want to trigger or annoy weird people.
right
right
There is no excuse for not having experienced things. Being alone doesn't stop you doing things. No excuses dude.
Ok.
Two things
First: get on with living your life. Go do cool things. Do things you like. GO DO STUFF. No excuses. It's a big fun exciting cool world, go take part in it. What other people think about this DOES NOT MATTER.
Second: find someone who will be honest about you and your interactions with others. THIS WILL TAKE TIME. People don't want to give negative feedback, don't want to annoy people, don't want awkwardness or discomfort. Learn to understand why this is the case. Learn to see everything from the other person's point of view. You don't have to agree with it, but always try to understand it. Study and try to work out how to speak better. You can learn it. Learn to give people what they want.