I met a girl three weeks ago. In the last week I felt the conversation not going anywhere and I am the one initiating most of the texts. So I decide to just stop texting her and focus on other things.
After 5 days, she texted me asking where have you being.
Should my response be just that I am busy
Or should I say that I got bored and thought she is not interested.
Or is there a better response?
Lone_Ranger 1 8mo ago
You still haven't answered my question: have you fucked this woman yet? (I'm getting strong vibes that you have not)
direct99 8mo ago
I haven't
Lone_Ranger 1 8mo ago
OK .... I'm assuming that you are quite young?
It seems from what you have written (not much to go on) that you have fallen into the trap of 'number hunting'. This is endemic among young men. They confuse the process with the mission. Getting a girls number is literally only for logistics - the entire point, the mission, is to smash.
Women hand out their number like confetti to men that they have no intention of smashing. Because while you are number hunting, she is orbiter hunting. She wants a large number of eager S-words (not allowed to say it) to make her phone go bing the whole time. That's all she wants. She wants to drag you into a text exchange that goes on forever, with no sex. When she is sitting down with her bestie in starbucks having a shoko-loco-coco-moco, she wants her phone to bing more than her friends. When her friend says 'who's that? she wants to be able to say 'Oh, just some guy that keeps texting me' ....'Look at all these messages'.
Male attention is the currency of validation. She wants your attention, not your dick.
Adapt and learn. Do a cold approach and go for close. Don't go for numbers.
lurkerhasarisen 8mo ago
Some guys are saying that, "You didn't seem interested" is the wrong answer. I have a different take: being straightforward is a "power move," and nothing is more straightforward than the simple truth. The simple truth is that you stopped texting because she wasn't showing interest.
Not every girl is going to be interested or maintain interest. Most won't... and that's okay. I wouldn't offer that out of the blue because it's the equivalent of rage-quitting, but since she asked, you lose nothing by answering.
The subtext of, "You didn't seem interested" is that you're a man whose time is too valuable to waste chasing women who don't want to be caught, and she put herself into that category. If she's just looking for another orbiter she'll wander off on her own, but if she was running girl game by, "playing hard to get" she'll realize that she needs to make an effort. Either way, the problem resolves itself.
It should go without saying that don't care either way because you're a man with options. You're not butthurt: you just have other irons in the fire. (Obviously you're not supposed to explain the subtextual stuff to her.)
Just telling the truth tends to keep your life uncomplicated, and it almost never "backfires."
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Always DARE never DEER with women
Also game more women. You shouldn't care what this one hoe you've never even slept with thinks. You should have multiple women in your phone trying to hit you up by being an interesting and valuable guy. If that's not you yet work on that first instead of trying to explain to a hoe you have no history with why you haven't texted her (you're only texting no dates no nothing = beta anyway)
Also
READ THE SIDEBAR
direct99 8mo ago
I do have other girls. But I thought saying "I got bored" makes me sound beta.
Lone_Ranger 1 8mo ago
You do have other girls??
That you are texting or fucking?
Please explain.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Some of you guys overthink the alpha beta thing to such an extreme. Your original answer to her is just plain boring and weak
My DARE crosspost still stands and if that doesn't answer your original question then read amused mastery essay by rollo tomassi
You have endless answers to choose from. Overt explanation is a losing strat
financehardo420 8mo ago
“I’ve been balls deep in grind mode these past few weeks my b; wyd tonight”
“the more you fuck around the more you find out”
direct99 8mo ago
Lol is this serious
financehardo420 8mo ago
as serious as cancer
Lone_Ranger 1 8mo ago
Ok, "I've been balls deep in your sister these past few weeks, my b, wyd tonight?"
No-Stress-Cat 8mo ago
LOL
EurasianChad 1 8mo ago
Ask her out directly. Tell her to hang out.
Dude... are you looking for a text mate or a fuck buddy?
Lone_Ranger 1 8mo ago
Oh god, here we go again. Let me guess - you have never actually fucked this woman?
Let me guess - you met her IRL, and then get her phone number as quickly as possible, so that you could get out of the IRL interaction (which was making you nervous). You then pivoted to a SMS 'relationship'...where you are now. Texting back and forth.
Do you not realise what is going on here? She is looking for orbiters. She wants her phone to go bing, so she gets her dopamine hit. Do you not realise that you are one of dozens of guys that she gives her phone number out to? You are just a number in her orbiter inventory.
Meanwhile, somebody chad that is not interested in text games is rearranging her innards on the reg.
mattyanon Admin 8mo ago
definitely don't overt say you think she's not interested.
tell her something like "sorry babe, the international spy agency called me back. can't tell you more at this time".
redhawkes 2 8mo ago
If it's not going to logistics, you're an orbiter.
Text her you're busy, but have some free time the following days and setup a meeting.
Smfh