Why do people owe you respect?

I would agree with this, but people in my age who have done the same things as me get the respect and friendship I want.

We are not all special. On average, people are average. This is reality. Your ability to deal with reality is the mark of a man. Some never manage.

You're right, I'm pretty average and I do have a desire to be "that guy" aka the life of the party, the guy whose attention everyone desires male and female alike, the "cool kid". But how can average be the "alpha" as defined by TRP?

Think about every man you respect. You know what they have in common? They've achieved something or overcome something. No man has ever walked into a room and screamed "respect me!" with good results.

The men I respect are all old now. Like my grand-father who's approaching a 100 years of age soon. He is a self-made man that survived through everything. But his grind was decades before my parents had even met. I don't respect anyone at the uni. I have no role models. I can't idolise someone and "be" like them here.

Give me a roadmap to earn respect and demonstrate value.

Hi, I am pretty extroverted sometimes it even feels like I am on the spectrum. Often, I say too much but in my head I'm thinking "I'm making small talk" turns out some things I have said have weirded people out and most times I say nothing of value, I don't add to the mood rarely I subtract the vibes and of course often times the same conversations have increased the vibes. So it's a mixed bag. Also, I have been informed that I am "stupid". I am not, but the directions I often lead the conversations to and some of my actions are fucking stupid I won't lie.

Went from the class clown

I have never been the class clown but I have always tried to be one, to the extent that if people were aware of just basic psychology they could classify me as a "tryhard". This has always been the case for me. I am nothing but always trying to be something that I am not. Like a really bad actor. Ofcourse, people can't put it into words but being human they get the feeling that something's off with me. Another problem is that I am morbidly obese. At this point maybe even you can tell, that my phenotype does not match my personality. My personality as well is kinda non-existent. I have no passions, no desires that are greater than my life, I don't hold anything so high in my pov that I may be identified by it. For example, you have the kids that absolutely love football/socccer, you have people that have their whole personality about weed. I am not like that. I don't even identify myself with food which is the common assumption people might have when they look at me.

Change to where they can only respect you.

Become absolutely jacked is one way.

I have joined a gym but it will take time. A LOT of time. I am ready to dedicate that time but I also need to get better at holding conversations and increasing my reputation within that same timeframe.

Very slippery slope to fucking yourself.

I realise that. At this point I haven't kms because "mom will be sad". Seriously, that's it.

I also, don't know how to talk to girls. I try, I always do but at this point it's like I should just shut up and ignore them than say something and take a hit to my reputation. I am not even trying to fk them. Just want to make friends.

Why do you wish to escape reality so? Are you depressed? Change your reality to where you respect yourself and you will view these things as degenerate.

I don't wish to escape shit. It's the media I have consumed over the years making me think that drugs are cool and all that. My eagerness is purely conversational. Again small talk of a tryhard wannabe.