I’ve been thinking about this more as I get older and especially now as a lot of my friends are starting to get engaged.
Wouldn’t any reasonable girl be in a LTR by a certain age I’m not saying I expect everyone to be in a relationship but it seems a girl being single for a long period of time entering her late 20s would be a red flag.
It seems whenever I meet women who are both respectable and beautiful they more than likely tend to have a boyfriend, usually confirmed. If she’s just beautiful with no personality I get it. But more than likely the good ones seem taken I guess its just a matter of timing.
Like I know girls who have had trains ran on them in college that both just got engaged to respectable guys. Seems to me like it isnt hard for a women to find a LTR especially with dating apps. Maybe im overthinking this.
Probably need to reread sidebar, but it seems like a smaller amount of these girls are sexual available. Should I pursue younger women?
EurasianChad 1 1y ago
Theres a distinction here.
Is it hard for women to find an LTR if they are good looking? No, its easy as fuck. She can put a sign that says "looking for BF", hold it up on the road, and guaranteed she'll have tons of dudes down instantly. Granted most of these guys she will lose respect for as most men in this world are beta/soy.
Is it hard for women tto find an LTR with a RESPECTABLE, HIGH QUALITY, LEADER/VISIONARY TYPE MAN? - Extremely hard. All the top dudes that women want to lock down, are usually exercising their abundant options.
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Hugo_The_Great 1y ago
Depends on the reason.
Were they focused on their studies, while juggling work to pay the bills and barely had time to date/never came across a guy they fancied enough? Did their father raise them well enough for them not to bring a bum boyfriend to Christmas dinner?
Or were they too busy partying, spending daddies money, hooking up, doing drugs etc?
I find that you will usually discover clusters of red flags, rarely just 1. So if you find 1, like a girl never having had a LTR before, keep digging for others. If you find more, you'll know enough.
Overkill_Engine Endorsed Contributor 1y ago
If she's wanting a relationship when she's in her 30's and 40's and didn't put her full energies towards finding one in her 20's and doesn't have some excuse like being chained to a wall in a convent basement...
She is absolutely a fuckup of some sort, the only question is: How BAD of a fuckup?
Because even a fucking pig-ugly woman post puberty with a working vagina has a tremendous amount of sociosexual power that she can exercise on her behalf should she choose to.
SarsaparillaCorona 1y ago
I'm gonna lean towards 'you're overthinking this'.
People love their red flags and judgemental statements, they act as beautiful disqualifiers and excuses to not pursue options, and this is true in a lot of areas of life where the 'good' thing is at the end of a 'hard' path.
If a woman has remained single for the majority of her 20s, there's always a bunch of reasons, but honestly they can all be broken up into 'good' reasons or 'bad' reasons.
I think there's a strong argument to be made for the vast majority of women in that situation that they fell for the feminist perpetuated lie of 'having it all' when it comes to dating. I don't blame them, in the same way you wouldn't blame a newbie here for falling for the feminist perpetuated doctrine of what makes a man a good dating prospect or attractive. As always, I consider the male version of a 'slut' to be a 'nice guy', so if a former nice guy is capable of reform, a former 'slut' is capable of that same reform as well.
The difference lies in the fact that a former 'slut' needs to show that she is over that aspect of her life before she can be considered for an LTR, or at least she needs to show that she is willing to forgo concepts of instant gratification and easy wins before she can be entrusted with that position in your life. This takes time, and it's why many RP guides and concepts rely on a 'causal first' position and the hierarchy when it comes to women and dating.
You are right though, as they get older, the paths begin to diverge, and a woman in her 30s who has been single for a long, long time has either been single because her requirements or perception of value do not align with her bargaining power in the Sexual Marketplace, or they have instead failed to gain the emotional and mental maturity required to form a healthy long term relationship.
Like with dogs, it's easier to train a puppy than it is an adult, but if you are confident and assertive enough, it can happen. You just need to know when to fold it and when to let it go, and having options and building a strong sense of outcome independence and abundance mentality through engaging in casual sex is important to build that confidence and assertiveness, essentially putting you in a sexual position of 'fuck you money'.
So yeah, as with all women and prospects, they should have to climb a ladder and if they don't want to climb it or disqualify themselves, they shouldn't be helped up that ladder. Older women struggle with this because they're used to being hoisted up to the top rung by virtue of being a warm wet hole in a man's life which has been absent of warm, wet holes, but if you have the ability to get access to warm wet holes, all of a sudden the idea of hoisting someone up to that top rung to get that isn't as appealing.
Lone_Ranger 3 1y ago
You say 'former slut' and I think most men would agree that there is no such thing as a former slut. Once a slut, always a slut.
Women only get off the CC because the market doesn't want what they have anymore. This is why you see a lot of women past 30 with the immortal phrase 'dating with a purpose' or 'looking to settled down'.
they are acting as if their PREFERNCES had changed, when the reality could not be further from the truth. They would much rather still be slutting around, but they have been pushed out of the market by the horde of younger, hotter, sluttier and nastier women come on the scene every single year.
Einsamer 1y ago
Unfortunately, that's not how it works. Being a nice-guy means pain (and confusion). When turning from a nice-guy into a rp-guy, you will remember how the pain felt. It's like first eating shitty food and then great food. You don't want to go back.
But for a slut it's the other way around. They are having fun while it lasts. It's like great good food first, then the wall arrives and it's shitty food. So they will always want to go back to tasting the delicious chad. Some will do it with a stronger desire than others, but the memory is always gonna be there.
It's like an addict. They never lose their addicton, they just control it by removing the drugs from their life.
InternilizedStage2-2 1y ago
This is good comparison.
Just an acknowledgment here. We might not even notice slipping back to the old ways or Chads becoming betas since they have never knew it is possible.