I'm currently going to university and been on the online dating apps. Getting a few matches a day usually around night time, and I saw someone recommend before that matches during the nighttime usually mean you should try to set something up for that night. So I've been following that but it usually ends in ghost or they give me their number and we continue the conversation there and they ghost when I try to set up logistics.
This is how it goes most of the time:
me: opener based on their profile
her: replies back to the message
then we banter for 4-5 messages, and I try to set up logistics or get number.
usually at this point, they either ghost when I suggest a plan for the night, or they give me their number, and when I text logistics for the night or the next night, they ghost.
it's something like "i'm going on a drive and grabbing some food, come join" or "i'll be at ____ bar tomorrow night, you should join me".
what's missing in my game? am I trying to close too fast on the night of? keep in mind the conversation probably lasts 3-4 hours if they match during the night, or throughout the day with hours in between messages if they match during the day.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
You're not running it naturally
Open on profile, ask what they are up to in that first or second message, or insinuate what they must be up to
[Comment about profile, what are you up to?]
Or
[Comment about profile, are you downing one of those vibrant margs right now (if she has a pic of one etc)?]
Preferably if you insinuate what she must be up to off her profile (it shows you looked) these things you mention will dovetail into plans
Maybe try to meet at a quick drink stop near your place or hers and then pull if you two vibe or bait her into being interested in something at your place or hers. Movie, guitar, drinks, cooking some quick tacos or something etc
You're just not doing this very naturally from the sounds of it. You're opening them and then picking out forced unnatural plans without really baiting something they might otherwise be down for
universitythrowaway 1y ago
good advice. i do feel like the logistics are random when looking at some conversations.
how about this one?
me: commenting on her hinge prompt i could definitely out smoke you
her: wanna bet?
me: i don’t like taking money from uni students but if you insist
… few more msgs bantering
me: i’ll take you up on your bet if you’re up for it tonight :)
then she ghosts
Problematic_Browser 1 1y ago
The best success I've had with OLD (I don't like it, but it's a handy plan B) is from following one key principle:
Be the best option she has for that day.
I will never fucking try to get a weekend date using OLD - most people, but especially women, have plans with other people on weekends. As a stranger, I don't have a shot in hell of trumping those.
But a Tuesday night meet for just drinks? That's not only "safe" but it will likely not intrude on her plans.
dongking 1y ago
Imo you're taking too much advice from old dogs which hardly have done any OLD with this younger generation of women. Straight to logistics simply does not work with girls aged 18-25 anymore. It's a waste of time to "game" em' like that.
Here's my go to:
Match, vibe abit for 10-30 messages on Tinder. Like good ping pong, ask a lil about her, tease and neg just a little bit.
Move over to Snapchat. Vibe for a day or two, i.e. not 100s of messages but a few photos/videos and a lil bit of ping pong chatting. Preferabely to show off that you're not a weird creep and also some value like gym/shirtless pic, when you're vibing with friends etc. Basically the idea is to show some social proof, sexualize a lil bit and build trust.
universitythrowaway 1y ago
amazing advice. i’ve noticed too that most of my friends that pull from OLD get their snap and snap back and forth throughout the day. the posts on here always talk about getting the number though so I’ve always thought that was the only way.
a few more questions:
how do you know if you’re vibing enough to suggest them come over for a movie or etc
would you suggest getting the snap for daygame as well?
financehardo420 Should i (x1) 1y ago
Dongking really fucks everything he said was more or less spot on. Snapchat is absolutely key fuck asking for the phone number.
I would also add: if possible skip the whole date bullshit. Fuck them first. Then take em on dates. Tf it’s not 1969 anymore it’s 2023 hoepocalypse dawg live like it
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financehardo420 Should i (x1) 1y ago
Personally I’m not a fan of OLD; I strongly prefer going out in the wild to find my chicks.
That being said; I can tell if a girl is a junkie from her profile pics. They’ll usually be 1) overly skinny and 2) and have big bags under their eyes from all the drugs. Purple/weird ass hair colors, lots of rave pics, excessive and untasteful tattoos/piercings are also pretty solid giveaways. That’s inherently not the type of chick I find myself attracted to so I wouldn’t even swipe right on those type of chicks.
As per the crazies… imo today something is off with prob like 80% or more of OLD chicks. Whether that be they’re bat shit crazy, have some kind of disgusting physical feature that’s a major turn off when you see it, or are just overall really disagreeable people. Regarding crazy chicks specifically… I believe crazy eyes are a real thing and I can spot it from a mile away. Obv swipe left on crazy eyes. Can never know for sure but how is a quick chat going to hundred percent determine whether or not they are off the charts crazy? Usually the crazies can hide it on first encounter (unless if they’re immediately blowing you up w some out of pocket bs).
You’re not finding your wife on OLD; you’re finding plates. So yes; fuck them first why not lol
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financehardo420 Should i (x1) 1y ago
Right I mean idk if she’s a catfish I won’t open the door for her? I have a Glock 45 in my home I’m not scared of anything lol