I am a 22 Italian male in a LTR since late 2018, new to TRP. I have always found impossible to get good quality girls as they would ignore me, so I have set my focus on my career to try to disregard this unfortunate fact. I decided not to go to university to become an airline pilot. In 2018 I met this girl, who wasn’t really hot, but slightly below average. As the years passed, she started to gain weight and now I’d say she’s fat. On top of that, she’s unsuccessful in her studies. Apart from that, she says she loves me and all that sugar coated words, and she confirms it physically. What disturbs me is her behaviour, in some circumstances she is really distant, this was proven to be true when my dad passed away last year. I felt like she couldn’t care about me and acted like nothing happened. In general, when things go south, she keeps a safe distance. I am getting tired of this situation, but the social life isn’t really for me, let alone dating and similar. My career is on a good path as I got hired by an airline and I am going through the course to get rated on a 70-ton jet, but my situation with girls is terrible. I have worked really hard to get to where I am, but I seem to be stuck with “leftover” girls. At times, I would like to have no interest in girls, but unfortunately this is not the case. I would like to kindly ask someone with more experience some advice, if they have any. Thank you for providing an unbiased space where I can ask all of this.
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whytehorse2021 2y ago
OMFG this is so pathetic. When I was 22 I was humping an M-16A2/1 in a dirt fox-hole. You kids really have no idea what it's like to be a man. Kick that stupid bitch to the curb.
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whytehorse2021 2y ago
If you ever need an expert marksman/grenadier hit me up. Otherwise you get this riff-raff.
benzino 2y ago
Your questions are answered in the stickied posts but I'll try to answer it shortly.
1st: lift, groom, wear clothes that compliment your physique.
2nd: learn game and how to interact with women
3rd: always keep purpose and career as your top priority, but do not rely on it to attract women.
Read through the stickied posts for more info
unknown39 2y ago
All good points but rotate order to 3, 1 and 2 given OP’s age. Career / wealth is paramount in spite bad bitches, leftover bitches, or no bitches.
Lifting for good health and starting early in your 20s.
Game will come naturally when first two are in order.
benzino 2y ago
I put them in that order for a reason. I personally think that OP needs to get used to gaming women and understanding how they operate first and foremost.
If he got a good career going, no doubt women will be attracted to him, but many of them will be looking for his wealth and try to take advantage of him. There are many examples of successful but blue-pilled men falling victims to gold diggers like Johnny Depp.
The 3 points are not meant to be steps taken one after another though. OP can of course upgrade his appearance while focusing on his career. And date some women in the mean time. I would not advise him to get an LTR at his age, not until he gets more experience with women at least
Laxiii 2y ago
I heard that pilots fucks alot, like top 5 job that fucks, so maybe life changes for you. As always lift and lisen to good music
Problematic_Browser 1 2y ago
Well, there's a saying I use that applies to both men and women:
"You get what you deserve in the dating market."
If you're getting leftovers it's because that's what you qualify for - your outcomes in the dating market are a direct reflection ofyou. It isn't a problem with the women, the market, or the position of Saturn... It's all related to you and your SMV.
The good news is that you can change it.
The most crucial thing you can do is lift. Get fit. Did you know only 3% of men can bench 225? Most men are soft pieces of pig meat and getting fit will automatically put you in the top 15% (physically).
Stop accepting swine. If you truly think that your SMV is higher than what you're getting, walk away from offers from lower SMV women.
I want to comment on something from your post:
Something people don't want to accept is that women do not give a shit about men unless it serves their own selfish needs. Her acting this way is a giant red flag because she couldn't even be assed to pretend to give a shit about you during a painful time in your life.
unknown39 2y ago
29 year old 6ft with max bench 195. And that’s with a partyboy lifestyle on the weekends.
You absolutely do not deserve what you get in the dating market. I’ve seen it from all angles. That’s also against trp core beliefs: women go for men slightly or considerably (if they’re deluded) above them.
So improve for yourself OP, and not for no bitch. There is no endgame at which you will find a girl you deserve. You must learn to love yourself.
Problematic_Browser 1 2y ago
Wrong.
The dating market is unfair, maybe. But it's understandable and able to be played. If you can't win, it's because you're not doing what it takes to win.
Edit: and 195? Weak as fuck. My 41 year old ass can push 195 on a bad day.
amazonri 2y ago
Wait until you actually become a pilot. Should help your SMV.
A lot of people are in school and about to "become a doctor, lawyer, *insert high smv career".. a lot of times it never happens and guys lie about it. Or hes "about to blow up as an artist, or might be able to make the NFL in a few years".. Girls have heard it all. They have learned to wait at the finish line.
Once youre like 23-25 years old and a legit pilot, you will walk the walk and girls will see this. Dont worry brother, but the glory is on the other side. Another thing is, it doesnt matter how high smv you are, if you dont put yourself out there. Or if youre in the wrong city, wrong social circle. Finish your career, hopefully relocate to a better city, and put yourself out there on more dates. Dont settle for a low hanging fruit (sounds like how you are describing your LTR)
Intrepid_Place53900 1 2y ago
What Benzino said in his response.
Also, she's fat now, it's only going to get worse. She's looking for a meal ticket, she'll likely get, ooops, I'm prego, how'd that happen?
You want a life with her?
Like Benzion said, along with when you get the job, you'll be more popular with the girls. $$ always helps
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nicknack 2y ago
Facts. Since I did this ~2 years ago, and told myself I only talk to girls I find genuinely attractive (7.5+), I've only been with girls I find genuinely attractive. What a surprise. I haven't even smashed less after the first few months, as you just get used to that level of looks.
Duga3 2y ago
What do you mean by "don't give yourself an exit"?
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Lone_Ranger 3 2y ago
some of the comments here are a bit hard on OP. I'm going to say this: you're doing well. You have chosen a pathway (pilot) now you need to work hard to make that a reality. This is a highly competitive field. A lot of people drop out or fail - make sure you do EVERYTHING in your power to make sure that you are one of the winners, one that survives all the tests and training, till you get your wings.
You are 22 - this is the golden moment to focus on your career and success. You are also probably broke. Women are not attracted to broke 22 year olds - they are all in the clubs, fucking rich dudes. Forget about them. Focus on you and your success. That is all that is important.
Do not pour your effort and attention into women at this stage in your life (I made that mistake). Focus 100% of your attention on your career. Women will come later, when you are successful. If you are successful.
I don't know the GF you are talking about now, but it sounds to me like you are not that interested in her. I would ditch her and move on.
There isn't a problem with you. there is a world wide problem with excess social media usage. Young women consume huge amount of social media and as a result, they have a really distorted view of what men should be - they really think that the average man is like some fantasy they see on Instagram - rich, boat, car, six pack, owns his own night club, you know what I mean. And they only want to fuck that guy. That guy will fuck them, but he won't LTR or marry them. So it goes.
Forget about women, focus on yourself, be successful and then the women will come.
unknown39 2y ago
This is the best advice here.
The reality is your time and resources are limited. So prioritize what makes most sense now. This whole idea that you can be ripped, rich and exciting (lifestyle wise) is a fallacy of people with little life experience (and deluded girls who spend too much time on curated socials meant to distort your sense of reality.)
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
Ok.
First off: sounds like you're being realistic, which is good. Well done on your career..... you can fix a social life and a girl situation in a few short months, but a great career takes decades.
As regards your relationship: this is sadly normal. You've checked out of the relationship, and it's important to know that she has too. She's fat because she doesn't care how you feel about her. She doesn't care about you when things go wrong because she's selfish and self centred (almost all women are like this).
You've chosen "get one girl on easy mode" and now you're getting where that gets you: a fat low SMV girl who doesn't care about you (as you've spotted the words are easy but the actions don't lie).
So let me break this down for you.
You either stick with where you are, or you change it. Same or different, that's your first choice. If you stick with "same", eventually your girl will get so fat you don't want to fuck her, or she'll leave for someone else claiming that she isn't excited by you anymore.
But to change it means getting other girls, and that means some combination of being more attractive and being able to talk to them. And being social. That's not easy, but it can be done and it's very, very good for your personal development.