Ive always been a rather intimidating guy, not the biggest, but intimidating in a naturally muscular athletic frame and high testosterone feature face type of way (read: traditional masculine facial traits).
Im 26 and recently went through some major life changes. I secured a career that pays me well, and in a white collar industry thats pretty open minded to being tattooed (new generation i guess). Ive always wanted some since 18, but held off because i was living with my parents and i didnt have expendable money like that and also was worried about getting a job. So anyways fast forward to now...with all this new money and "career permission" over the course of 3 months I got two full sleeves done, but it basically feels mentally as if I got them done overnight.
On top of that I jumped on my first steroid cycle within these same 3 months I got tattooed. Iver been lifting naturally for almost 10 years and did my research. I did the most basic, safe, bang for your buck steroid cycle, which is known to many as the "beginners cycle" and went from 190 to 210 pounds. Im not saying I gained 20 pounds of muscle or anything but I am basically the same body fat proportionally ive been at 190, just 20 pounds bigger, its crazy.
So basically Im 5'11 210 pounds now, with sleeves, what felt like overnight from being 190 my whole life which was "respectfully big" . I am aware that I have similar proportions to professional rugby and NFL or MLB baseball players now, whereas 190 is more like varsity athlete tier.
Because of this transformation, I feel amazing. My SMV in the dating world has undoubtedly increased. I feel a lot more respect from men, but that was never an issue before. Its just that I feel a lot of Fear from men now, and it makes me uncomfortable. I want friendly vibes, I dont want to scare people.
But I just had a bad day recently. I was walking around with my muscles and tattoos out (sounds vain but in other words i was wearing a tank top and shorts as I live near a beach), and a lot of people at night walking their dogs seemed to avoid me, which was unusual behavior. I called an Uber to drop me off there earlier, and the guy seemed super rigid and palpably scared while driving me there. Later that same night an older lady picked me up with Uber and I felt fear in the car, which was not usual. I think at the end of the day im this 210 pounds muscular tattoo stranger guy theyre alone with, something i never really considered when i was 185 pounds (more normie "in shape") and not tattooed.
How can I take the edge off? I want to be the best version of myself. But if it means scaring society and getting pussy as a side effect its kind of bittersweet.
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 2y ago
I saw your post when it was new the other day, but I wanted to hold off on replying until I had time to go into detail. I face a similar problem quite frequently, and have ever since high school. Unlike all the tards trying to see if they can trick you into dressing like a total faggot by saying "hurr dee durr wear a fedora!", I can actually help you.
I don't have the knee-jerk hatred of tattoos most dudes in the manosphere do. My wife and I both have a little ink. Thing is, ours is easily hidden, and people frequently express surprise when they see the one on my shoulder for the first time, such as when I change shirts. Sleeve tattoos aren't easily hidden. You may want to wear long-sleeved shirts. If you work a physical job exposed to the elements like I do, wearing loose long-sleeved shirts will actually keep you cooler by keeping the sun off your skin. This has the added benefit of protecting your ink from sunlight, which can make it fade way faster than it should. I got my most recent tattoo in 2005, and it still looks good because I keep it out of sunlight.
Steroids: don't do that. I know you like your results, but the damage they do to your testicles, kidneys, and liver aren't worth it. Also, the more you use them, the less testosterone your body will naturally produce. This is not a good thing, long-term.
As far as not being so scary: here's where I can help the most. My own brothers, wife, and closest friends over the years have marveled at how scary I'm capable of looking, and how it juxtaposes with what a goofball I act. One even commented when looking at my student ID years ago "if I didn't already know you and what a goofy bastard you are, I'd be scared to death of you after seeing that photo!"
Read up on body language. Try to avoid closed-off postures (crossed arms are about the worst), and try to look open and inviting. This helps with seduction and everything else in life. Try to avoid scowling or RBF. you don't have to grin all the time, but try to soften your facial expressions. Save angryface for when you're actually angry.
Learn to joke and be playful with people. "Dad jokes" tend to loosen people up and help them feel less intimidated.
When you're large enough to crush most men, people know it. You don't have to try to intimidate, as you have seen for yourself. Thing is, this is actually freeing. You are free to be friendly without looking like a pushover (and be careful not to become a pushover). Think of how large dogs are usually friendlier and quiet, but small dogs bark, growl, and yap a lot. You're a big dog now; people can see it, so there's no need to yap.
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No-Stress-Cat 2y ago
Piggybacking off of this...Fedora, Raybans, Hawaiian shirt, Chino shorts and canvass shoes. Be like you're on vacation. People will see you're having a good time and not be intimidated.
nicknack 2y ago
Tattoos have and always will be a sign of the bad boy thug criminal, hence why women love them. Nowadays women are making themselves into the men they want so they get tattoos, and betas picked up that tattoos help them get women so now we have a pandemic.
One thing is for sure, when I meet the very rich and / or high class people of any society they don’t have tattoos.
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coolsocks00 1 2y ago
Huh. You really went all out overnight.
Well, be more outgoing and nice. People will be pleasantly surprised.
benzino 2y ago
Wear glasses. That usually helps. If people are still intimidated then wear a fedora too
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