So we know how most women do it, just ghost you. But today I went on a date with a girl I honestly didn’t find that attractive. I thought I would give it a shot but she looked far worse in person (she didn’t purposely catfish).
Anyways she was very nice, lots of green flags in terms of personality, but I don’t think I can ever be physically attracted to her. How do I politely reject her?
Whisper Moderator 2y ago
Why would you not just ghost her?
Chad_Bodmor 2y ago
I've been in the position of turning girls down a bunch of times, and I tell you, women go on and on about how frail male ego is, but tell one of them you aren't interested and they can go ballistic. Some of them are outright crazy when it comes to rejection, in that, on date one, hell sometimes on dance number one, they've already picked out the wedding venue and colors.
If you go with the classic. "I had fun but I don't see us long term/working out" you'll get a "why?" You'll have to tap dance through. In fact any attempt at letting her down softly is likely to shoot straight to bargaining on the Kubler Ross to avoid swallowing the "I wasn't good looking enough to light his fire" pill that absolutely decimates a woman's self esteem.
Ghosting is likely your best bet, and the easiest on the both of you in the long run. If you really really want her to be OK with the breakup, you could treat her like a dick until she breaks up with you and then she will be cool with it. But I really don't recommend doing that, because she will scorch earth you prospects to the best of her ability.
Good luck.
Impressive-Cricket-8 2y ago
Do the other bullshit women do: tell her it was fun, but you just didn't feel a spark.
chadinthemaking69 2y ago
“You’re a nice girl and all, but I think we should be friends.”
Lone_Ranger 3 2y ago
You should also spell out what 'being friends' means. She will need to like your SM posts automatically and frequently, take you out, pick you up and drive you home, buy you drinks, tell you how amazing you are all the time, drive you to the airport before dawn etc. And if there is a group of guys bothering you at the bar, she needs to step in and risk life and limb so that you aren't harassed. Also, feel free to do a 'woe is me' dump any time you like, as she will have to act as your emotional tampon. Also, she needs to be prepared to give you endless advice that you will never listen to, and the listen to you crying and moaning as to why your dating strategy is not working.
Because equality.
chadinthemaking69 2y ago
I was actually thinking about this recently after having been rejected by girls that sit next to me everyday.
If they want to be my friend they are going to have to show me that they can handle the responsibility, or at least offer to hook me up with their friends, but we all know that they will use my attention and time for as long as they can without offering anything but the potential whiff of pussy in return.
Girls don’t even give a shit about their guy friends most of the time, they just use them for support. It’s kind of disgusting to see in real time.
One of my friends has a sorority girl who he’s friends with and she never asks him how he is, she always complains and asks him how he got into law school, and asks for help on her homework, and when he’s talking she doesn’t even look at him. Doesn’t give a fuck. It’s sad.
These girls may seem oblivious and stupid but they know exactly what they are doing.
Lone_Ranger 3 2y ago
Listen, my first post was kind of jokey, but in all seriousness, perhaps you need to evaluate WHY you think you want girls to be friends with you. Seriously, think about it carefully. There is no point in having friends that are girls in the vague hope that they are going to 'introduce you' to their friends, and that you are then going to bank those friends. This is very very rare. Its a losing strategy. In all honesty, if they did introduce you to one of their friends, it would only be
Part of growing up is realising that men and women cannot be friends. Not really. Boys and girls can be, but not men and women. It never works.
Women will hang out with men, for what it will get them. Free drinks, free protection, free handy man services. The best thing you can do for your situation is to simply realise that women are not going to be your friend. Period. Forget about that avenue. It's a dead end. Nobody ever got laid by being a friend to women. Worse than that, you start hanging around with women as friends, and then when it comes time to going out, you'll be doing taxi service, buying them drinks etc, and then when they meet one of the bad boyz TM at the club, that's when you find out whats what. 'What about him? - Oh, he's just a friend.'
Instead refocus your energy on other guys - make sure you have a vibrant circle of guy friends. Join a club. Do guy things. Have a good time. Don't waste time hanging out with women.
chadinthemaking69 2y ago
You missed my point. Or maybe I didn’t state it clear enough but I agree with everything you said. I don’t want to be friends with girls. If I find one that stimulates me intellectually or I can have a good time with, I’d probably want to fuck her, and that isn’t a friend.
The thought of being friends with a girl would only cross my mind if I didn’t want to have sex with her, and if she is fun to be around, like a bro. But guys are better friends 99.9% of the time.
It’s social ostracism to be friends with a girl if you want to be with her sexually.
helpfulguy22 2y ago
I 100% agree with u with everything you said, but there is one benifit to having female friends (hot ones) and that is pre selection. If you for example show other girls on social media or even in person hanging out with hot women, it will raise ur preselection value to other girls whom are not ur friends that you are trying to get at.
nicknack 2y ago
You shouldn’t care so much honestly. Just say I think we should remain friends. Im currently having to reject a girl after she’d sucked my balls dry on the first date, I’ll say the same thing I think xD
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nicknack 2y ago
The head was honestly S tier, but she wasn’t what I thought she was based off her Hinge. Has a disgusting tattoo that wasn’t featured on her profile, and is all around not nearly as attractive as the girls I usually date. Just don’t have time for her in my life. I got her to suck me because why not.
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lurkerhasarisen 1 2y ago
Tell her that you're "not feeling it" and offer to set her up with a guy on her level (don't tell her that, of course... just tell her that you know someone who might be a better fit).
financehardo420 Should i (x1) 2y ago
Just ghost her; it’ll build character and maybe one day it’ll inspire her to hit the gym and diet grind lol
AllBlack087 2y ago
Chad problems
master-of-losers 2y ago
I agree this post is a humble brag.
helpfulguy22 2y ago
I am not trying to brag at all I know it comes off that way, I have been ghosted by girls before in extremely rude ways, as I got more and more into red pill I understood it’s more about self improvement and making ur self better rather than being an asshole to be to women. She displayed greed flags the only thing I can’t get past is her looks, but since she treated me with respect I want to treat her with respect as well when rejecting her. Because if I ghost her then I’m no better than the girls that ghosted me in the past.