Hey guys I wanted to share this story with you so you can learn from me and my mistakes. I’m M 22 and 6’4 pretty objectively attractive guy. I have a real busy schedule and therefore I usually only use dating apps and Instagram to pick up girls. I made a lot of mistakes with this girl and just want to share my experience.
Anyways I met this one on Hinge and she was very high interest all over me, so I went along with her had her drive an hour to meet me for the first date where I got her some brunch. 2nd date we meet up at her place go to a museum and get a drink come back and have some good sex. I went out of town for holidays I didn’t talk to her really for about 3 weeks and she seemed kind of upset. I reached out when I was back and we hang out again and have some wild sex. I made her cum about 10 times in 24 hours and it was great. She told me our sex is the best she’s ever had in her life hands down. She got a schoolgirl lingerie outfit for me and wore it for me to fuck her because I told her that was one of my fantasies and she did that without me asking.
Anyways we keep talking more and more and started hanging out every weekend, she obviously wanted a relationship with me and I told her we need to experience each other more before then. However here is where I made the first mistake, she asked me if I was fucking other girls. And I responded and said no but I’m keeping my options open. She basically tells me that im the only guy she’s been seeing, etc etc and she upset and can’t believe this. She convinced me to be sexually exclusive with her while not even being a relationship. HUGE mistake on my end, where now she took away my power because we aren’t in a official relationship I can’t set boundaries etc. So basically she is getting what she wants by being my only source of pussy.
Furthermore, one of my boundaries in a relationship is to not have guy friends and usually I’m pretty strict about this but she tried to sweet talk me and i wanted to be a dumbass and give her the benefit of the doubt maybe these guys are just her friends. So I end going to a brunch with her and her girlfriends because I really need to see her friends before I invest anymore time into this girl, and 2 of her guy friends come along, which one of them I can just tell is into her and I had a feeling they did something together or he’s trying to. So after the brunch she asks me is it okay if we smoke real quick after with her friends and then head back to her house I’m like yeah sure but I’m not going to smoke because I get tested and don’t want to smell like smoke. I pictured them just stepping outside to do it but Next thing I know they want us to go hotbox with her best friend and 2 guy friends and and I can’t smoke or smell like it so I make that clear and say I’m going to step outside. This was my test to see what she does, will she join me or continue smoking with her friends? She opens the door after a minute and is like baby come back I miss you and I tell her no. She waits a couple more minute then says let’s go. At this point I’m basically ignoring her because I just felt disrespected at the whole situation. I call us an Uber back to her place and she’s trying to argue with me in the back of the car i just tell her I need some space and we can talk when we get back to the house. She grabs my phone from me and is like “No you’re gonna talk to me” I just took it back and said I’m not doing this with you. We finally get back into the house and she starts raising her voice like “what the fuck was that you aren’t even talking to me or holding my hand in public” I simply told her Im not going to argue with her but we can talk like adults.
We sit down to talk about it and she’s like “if you wanted to leave you could’ve just said that and I would’ve came instantly.” I tell her once I realized what you guys wanted to do I got out the car and gave you a choice to come with me or stay with me the, and even though you came with me it’s still the principle of realizing the situation. If I can’t smoke then you shouldn’t be having me around guy friends doing that shit in the first place. She ends up apologizing saying she loves me and that she wants to make it better, and we ended up having some more wild sex again before I left.
After I left she texted me saying that I’m the person she wants to be with for the rest of her life how she loves me and that I’m her special person, I just brushed it off and didn’t say much. Later that night I had some gut feelings about the whole situation, and realized that I needed to ask her straight up if she had any past feelings or sexual history with any of her guy friends. So I talked to her the next day and told her if we are going to continue and you want me to take you serious ever, then you can’t be going out with guy friends clubbing/smoking/drinking. She was like oh you should trust me and gaslighting me until I asked her did she have any history with these guys and she said she slept with one of them before a long time ago. I simply told her thank you for being honest but I take that as complete disrespect, so we’re done. She was like wow are you serious I can’t believe you etc, etc. Finally, I blocked her on everything and decided to hard next her.
I knew once she was putting up a fight about my boundaries that it wasn’t going to work and said that if you can’t accept this we can’t be together. Simple as that. I’m honestly thankful for the experience and learned a lot more about women with it, glad I didn’t invest anymore time or money into her either but I wanted to share so everyone else can learn from me too.
KEY TAKEAWAYS:
DONT go sexually exclusive with a girl who isn’t your girlfriend and haven’t established boundaries with.
Don’t let a woman gaslight you into thinking you’re insecure, trust your gut.
Stick to your principles, boundaries and guidelines with relationships don’t make exceptions.
Don’t let your girl have guy friends because they either slept together before or will later.
Don’t get overly emotional and overinvested into anyone.
Believe their actions not their words.

Jester 3y ago
great takeaways. exclusivity is a privilege to be earned by a girl accepting and adhering to your boundaries. All too common in society that exclusivity is given away freely by guys solely because of the good 'feels' he gets while being around her.
coolsocks00 1 3y ago
Seems like the FR made you see your own mistakes and reflect on them. Good FR, use more paragraphs.
hatefatwomen23 3y ago
You made the right choice, always trust your gut feeling. It's the same from my experience. Girls who have male friends (orbiters) in their social circle deserve to be on the streets. If given the chance, any of those guys would fuck their female 'friends' in a matter of seconds.
I've seen this plenty of times with former plates. Most of them had some beta male friend, who was getting nothing from the girl. But as soon as you screwed up, they would be the first in line to gaslight you, and to try to have sex with the girl.
As for your situation, you did great noticing the problem, but the way you handled it was pretty bad. It's always a waste of time to argue with a girl (I'm guilty of this too). When she disrespected you with the smoking, it would be better to come up with an excuse to leave the place, and ghost her for a few days. Now you seem insecure, because you're telling her not to hang out with her male friends. Even though it is a normal boundary to have, but most girls are retarded.
Ithappened8588 3y ago
Yeah my excuse to leave was that I didn’t want to smell like weed, I see where you’re coming from though.
My whole problem was her portraying me like her boyfriend to everyone while introducing me to “guy friends” she used to sleep with. Disrespecting me making me look like a cuck. She also didn’t want to follow my boundaries when I told them to her so I cut her off.
Lone_Ranger 3 3y ago
You could go either way on this one. I am assuming by 'smoke' you mean weed. not sure you did the right thing? Lots of guys and girls keep ex's in their circle of friends, its not a crime. I never that personally, once an ex, I never really wanted to see them again. But I dont' think this girl did anything wrong?
If you go around expecting perfection you'll end up with nobody. Sounds like you are looking for a woman with no past at all?
Was it more the fact that she smoked weed or the fact that she had an ex in her social circle that bugged you?
Ithappened8588 3y ago
Yes I mean weed. I don’t mind who a girl fucked in the past, it was the fact that she brought him around me and didn’t tell me about their past, wanting me to be all buddy buddy with him and she couldn’t respect my boundaries when I told her you can hang out with guys but I don’t want you clubbing/smoking/drinking with them because you aren’t in your right mind.
Also she completely lost her shit and was cussing me out when I told her we were done because that’s outwardly disrespectful to bring someone around me you fucked in the past and consistently still hang out with them. I feel like I dodged a bullet.
Lone_Ranger 3 3y ago
I get it.
No-Stress-Cat 3y ago
Good report. Well done, young brother.
whytehorse2021 3y ago
The moment she took your phone was the moment to set boundaries. I can see how you kind of got suckered into meeting her guy friends but you need to recognize party chicks as a huge red flag.