I moved to Cancun Mexico 6 months ago. We both met each other the first few weeks, he was new too. First time we hung out we smoked weed and bonded over our new lives in this new country, learning a new language, we are both Americans but from different states. We started going out together, everything from touristic things to simply drinking beers at Mexican dive bars and what not. Going to clubs and dancing with hot Mexican local girls. Took some adventures into risky dangerous Mexican hoods that tourists normally dont go to, something we bonded over, putting ourselves in danger, we would go to clubs or bars there but be respectful, and we got respect back from locals.
We both had Mexican girlfriends. But coincidentally we both kind of became single at the same time, both bonded over having gone thru break ups as well, being in a foreign country learning the language still. We went out to clubs almost every weekend, dancing with girls. Honestly, I never really tried to take one home, i just went to have fun with a bro on a night out and occasionally bringing some other guy friends along. I already had 1-2 rotation going from Tinder. And I knew he had something similar
Well, we took a 1 week trip together to Panama from Cancun. The tickets were less than $80 roundtrip so we thought why not. We were at a club and this was the first time we both discussed "bringing some girls back to our place" as a goal. Before it was just drink and have fun soaking in the environment. I thought why not, were in a foreign country.
We went to a club together and I ended up bringing back a Panamanian chick to the hotel. She honestly wasnt even that hot. She was like 28 and had a nice petite body but i personally like curvy latinas and younger 18-25. He didnt have any girl to bring back. The next day we flew back to Mexico and we were laughing about the night, and the trip was good times. But its been 2 weeks since we returned and he has flaked literally 4/5 times I wanted to meet up and chill.
Its clear to me, that I think it has something to do with me bringing the chick back home because he never really flaked before. Its like he feels defeated around me or I got a one-up on him. The truth is that hes a good looking White gringo guy and ive seen him attract some decent girls and we both had smoking hot girlfriends. He also does well on Tinder overseas.
Why would me hooking up with a chick one night make him start flaking? Im not jumping to conclusions here but im pretty sure it has something to do with his ego. He gets women, not sure why its a big deal. I never "bragged" about it either since then. Its just last time we chilled he seemed really out of it and sort of intimidated by me, which was out of character, he just seemed anxious. Its just weird to me.
It sucks because I really am focused on building life long friendships in my travels. We had bonded a lot over the trip, and i know it has something to do with the ONS. Because we genuinely did some crazy shit in Panama that I wont forget about when im older. I cant think of any other reason why he would start flaking so hard.
I know guy friendships are different than women. Sometimes women flake for attraction issues or whatever. But it always catches me offguard when a bro does it. Guys live by different codes and it usually takes a form of beef, jealousy, envy for male friendships to end.

whytehorse2021 3y ago
If he's doing coke that's why. It becomes all-consuming. You can check out this guy's channel where he interviews crack heads on the street to get an idea of where they end up and they tell their back story. https://www.youtube.com/@alltimemedia
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mattyanon Admin 3y ago
Good..... lifelong friendships are mutual. If he's flaking, that's a sign that this one is not going to be a lifelong friend. Accept him as he is: a flakey fuck.... and treat accordingly... which means not making plans with him if you care if he flakes.
pocketroxx 3y ago
Well technically they werent really "flakes." Which is a confirmed plan then last minute changing or cancelling. He just isnt agreeing to meet up, has an excuse such as "My sleep schedule is so fucked. Sorry dude." It really was, because on the last day in Panama when I had the ONS he slept for an hour. He was doing coke with some non-sketchy Peruvian guy outside our hotel while i was in my room with the girl (its a funny story). He slept at 9am-11am that morning and we left to the airport around 12pm. But its been like two weeks almost and hes still saying his schedule is fucked up hes sleeping at 7am and sleeping at 6pm-11pm from that night.
Hes been a really solid friend otherwise. Like he lent me money twice when I had ATM issues with my bank. $1000usd almost. I paid him back every time and then some but I can tell it made him a bit uncomfortable but he still did it out of being a real friend. Only a real friend would do this.
Its really his first "violation" of bro-code, but its whatever though. At this point im just gonna wait for him to hit me up first. Were both leaving in like two weeks to the USA, not together, but just similar time frames. Just wanted to chill with him a few times, because I plan on traveling South America longer and he is planning on jumping back into his 6-figure 9-5 job back home and we probably wont cross paths again. But hes mentioned me visiting his city or vice versa.
mattyanon Admin 3y ago
Your post title includes the words "flaking on me".
Things come and go. It happens.
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