Say someone doesn't like the amount/frequency you are tipping and they ask "did you remember to tip". First time I ignored/brushed off the question, then they ask again "did you tip"
How would you handle this as a man? The cuck is trying to socially shame you by making you admit that you aren't tipping because he takes displeasure with this behavior.
Just ask him "Is there a problem" and if he says no but continues being passive aggressive, let him know if there is no problem he needs to stop talking.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
Depends what the social expectation is. Tipping is a pretty standard social expectation unless the server/employee was dogshit.
I'm not sure why you'd take offense to someone saying you should tip, that's generally one of the social expectations you don't skip out on as a man generally speaking (unless you're poor)
If you're talking about other social expectations like taking women out to dinner etc or being expected to raise another man's bastard, then we're having a different conversation
If people are shaming you for things like above, you can pressure flip them and ask them a question of why they'd tolerate the expectation of they were in your shoes. That shuts up most people when they'd find themselves skipping out on the same expectation they're judging you for
Matthew 1y ago
This is at a poker table where they take 2 big blinds, 7 dollars out of every pot for the casino. The dealers make 5 dollars an hour + tips. A lot of recreational players tip 1 dollar every hand they win on top of the 7 dollars taken for the house. Since I am playing to make money I tip less frequently. This guy was annoyed I hadn't tipped this specific hand and was trying to pressure me into tipping or to admit that I was being cheap and not tipping.
At the time I explained he was being passive aggressive, I am playing to make money, that he should not tell me what to do, that if he is concerned about how much the dealer is making he can tip her, and asked him if he had any problem.
Terra 1y ago
Poker table. Isnt it the place you try to.shake.opponent?
Like other said nonreactional.
I would add - be patronising, but non reactive, calm steady voice: George you're such a good boy, you should tip instead of me. On response irrespective what it is, just repeat or: Come on George you know you want to do it.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
This makes sense. I imagined it was like a restaurant or something and it was a waiter/waitress
Your friend should have just shut up and played the game. Unneccesary confrontation on friend's part. Sounds like you handled it well but yeah if you made a lot on a hand, I could see tipping at the end of the game being reasonable. Your stance sounds good though
Not sure what more you could have done since your friend was doing this mid-game and presumably in front of everyone.
You could alternatively just not play with this friend any more going forward to also be proactive about it
coolsocks00 1 1y ago
You: "nah" Him: "you should" You: aloof smile, eye contact and a wink
If he brings it up again "i hear you say that", "maybe", "mhm" while not giving the time of day.
When you get defensive and confrontational you lose. Frame control.
Matthew 1y ago
makes sense, thanks.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Give a straight answer. Don't defend, don't give a reason.
"No"
"hey man you really should blah blah etc etc"
"As I said: No".
Other followups include "my life my rules".
Just don't lecture about "they earn enough because........." That is explaining, and only the weak need to defend or explain themselves.
You are avoiding, and that's bad too.
"No". Followed by things like "my life my rules" or "you do you bro" or "it's up to the individual how much they tip". Shit like that.
whytehorse2021 1y ago
This is red pill 101. DARE not DEER. Look it up.