She used to always ask me a variation of this. I took them as comfort tests, and treated them accordingly. She constantly used to hint that I was a bit too high value for her (I bet you get a lot of girls. I have a feeling you have many girls im just another one etc)
So initially I took it that my SMV was constantly dreading her and she was insecure.
But the comfort tests kept coming back in that variation, mainly during our fights. The third time she asked me that in a 1 month span, I basically told her "Sure." because the comfort wasnt working. She said "Omg youre so serious" And she never brought it up again.
Anyways, I am not so sure if these were comfort or shit tests. And I think those were actually out of baggage, such as a form of abandonment issues? So shes constantly making sure i wont abandon her?
I just never dealt with a girl asking me these questions before, when everything in the relationship was going smoothly. On the other hand, I did explore the possibility that she may have a second guy lined up and she wanted to make sure that this relationship wasnt crumbling before branch swinging...?
Its irrational, so im not sure if it was a comfort/shit test, branch swing in progress potentially, or most likely abandonment issues from childhood. She definitely has daddy issues, she didnt have the best relationship with her dad, he was present but not emotionally.. she does love him at the end of the day.
aj14 1y ago
I've got way too much experience with this type of question.
She has something fucked up in her past. She's been cheated on/raped/abandoned/etc, Take your pick and move on with it.
It's a self-fulfilling prophecy with bitches like this. She thinks you're too good for her, and will start to assume you're thinking of other women. She will in turn start to look for other guys as back up for when you inevitably leave her. It's not your job to constantly reassure her. She's probably guilty of some shit. Whether you care enough to get down to the bottom of it is up to you.
PandaPandaPanda 1y ago
I'm with you on this mate. Been with a girl for a short period and promptly left her when I noticed this behaviour. The constant seeking of reassurance was exhausting. I understand some women could be insecure. But there is insecurity and there is INSECURITY. You don't want to be constantly providing that because it needs to come from the inside of a person not from the outside.
[deleted] 1y ago
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mattyanon Admin 1y ago
So now you know it was a shit test.
The problem with comfort tests is that you look fucking beta if you provide comfort.
Try something more like "Look girl, I'm with you and I do a lot for you, if that's not enough to show you I want to be with you I don't know what the fuck is". Make her feel stupid and ungrateful.......... DO NOT provide more comfort, this will kill attraction. "You're lucky to have me" is what you want to project at all times.
Well, it's all a bit of a trick.
She's insecure, but female insecurity drives motivation and attraction so if you make her too secure she'll get bored, lazy and fat.
roblox_porn_addict 1y ago
That still sounds like "comfort" to me, isn't any statement affirming your commitment/interest "comfort"?
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
It contains a very obvious "shut the fuck up or I am outta here" threat.
STAYShredded 1y ago
Yea this is bad news, they usually think ur getting ready to branch swing and will likely be doing the same…
whytehorse2021 1y ago
Yeah she's probably setting up a branch swing. She's got a few orbiters she's stringing along and a few exes she can go back to. She doesn't know whether to drop them or keep messaging them and dangling her poosay card. The only way to know is to check her phone. Is she advertising her sexual availability to other men? Does she have a bunch of dudes in her contacts?
I lived with an ex-prostitute for a year. She was always up in my shit about cheating or talking to other women. Turns out she was fucking a bunch of other guys right under my nose. said she was cleaning houses. She was actually cleaning penises with her vagina.
bymxco 1y ago
I dont check her phone, isnt that insecure?
whytehorse2021 1y ago
Nope. That's man-shaming that sluts do so they don't get into trouble. It's biologically evolved in men to become jealous and territorial about their mate. It's also biologically evolved to be repulsed by promiscuous women.
bymxco 1y ago
Girls cant differentiate between self-respect and jealousy. Soemtimes we do things out of self-respect: not wanting to be cucked, they take it as jealous.
I have not heard the LTR Phone thing to be a redpill move. I would never want my girl to have access to my phone, even though im not cheating its just personal and my own stuff.
How do you create a situation where you are checking your girls phone, and she cannot see yours?
whytehorse2021 1y ago
Trust but verify. You can just do it while she's in the shower. If it's locked out get her password. Some guys will just straight up ask her to show him her phone. I would just be honest and say "Look, I noticed you've been asking me if I still want to be with you. It has made me wonder the same about you..." then give her a serious look. Wait for her to profess her undying love for you or dump you. If she professes love then say "OK, then can I see your phone?". So she has to prove her love now by showing you what's on her phone.
I believe this is called making her qualify to you and it's called a compliance test in red pill terminology.