I have been in college for 2 years now. Sometimes I’ll meet some guys I hit it off with, and they are always down to meet up, go out, drink, smoke, just chill etc.
We get along, crack jokes, they’ll give me free beer free weed, vice versa, good friendships. But I notice that they will rarely ever hit me up first. It’s always me reaching out.
It sort of makes me feel like they are just bored and are down to chill under those conditions.
Are these red flags or some guy friends just are passive and I guess (“not leaders”) when it comes to initiating plans.
All my best friends from high school back home hit me up all the time. I know it’s not fair to compare college bros to childhood best friends, but sometimes I’m not sure what to make of it.
Is it considered a friendship red flag if guy friends you meet do this to you? Like I said they’re almost always available to hang out and have good vibes we crack jokes etc. I just want some redpilled chill ass dude friends who are on their mission killing life, I want to surround myself with friends like this, so I’m constantly trying to find some solid male friends
Do some guys just passively tumble thru life and wait for others to make plans? Or are these “fake” college friends?
whytehorse2021 1y ago
Those are acquaintances. Think of them like plates. And like most women, they just bumble through life going with the flow, never initiating anything. Other guys will start approaching you when you are doing something interesting: working on a car, going fishing, etc. I go to these classic car shows and lots of guys initiate there and then talk your ear off about their rare and unique vehicles. Same thing at rocket launches. But it only lasts a short time and you never see them again until the next thing. I like to call them my "5 second friends".
It gets worse too as you get older. As guys get betatized by their wives they drop out of any male spaces and are never heard from again until they get divorce raped and turn up here or kill themselves. It's a sad state of affairs, my friend.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Ok bro..... I'll help you out here.
GET USED TO IT.
Most people are passengers in their own life story. Fuck all people will initiate, make plans or even try to maintain friendships. Even otherwise really great people. They will sit at home and cry about being lonely, but will not reach out, make plans, invite friends out, or do a damned thing to make a difference in their life.
Everyone wants an invite, noone does any inviting.
THIS IS HOW PEOPLE ARE.
Yep, it's useless and they are not great people. But this applies to 99.99% of the people on the planet, so you can't lose them over it.
Not "some"......... almost everyone is like this.