I have two other girls besides her I’m fucking. They really want me, constantly texting me how they can’t wait for the next time I dump my load down their throat. Its just simple, I don’t even think about them, I feel like I just have them.
But I hooked up with this really hot girl, and now she is all I can think about. And I KNOW my mind is fucking itself.
From the beginning when I matched her, she was always pretty aloof. Taking forever to respond to shit. Etc….. but I didn’t care at all, I just kept it positive and chill. Fun. I was like whatever happens happens.
But now after fucking her a few times I’m so in my god damn head. She was so sweet and attentive and nice and shit in person. Beautiful as fuck, just adorable.
Its like, she got covid and under any other circumstance I’d always ask a person. How do you feel, whats your mental state are you anxious. Try and help them. But with her now I’m like.
Does this come off as too nice. There is a chance she transmitted it to me but she didn’t ask me how I’m feeling should I do it for her.
X,y,z occurrence hanging out with her showed me she likes me, so maybe she is playing it cool I should lead and escalate into relationshippy shit because its what I want from her because I have oneitis. But nah I should divest and play it cool too always give less.
She’s a broke ass 18 year old and I’m a pretty wealthy 23 year old, I offered to pay basically the whole date. She wanted to split things but I wouldn’t let her. Even though at the time I gave 0 fucks, to me the $100 was nothing and to her it was everything. Does it come off as beta that I didn’t let her pay. Is she gonna want to see me again, or did I blow it.
She said she wants to be a fwb but still do all the cuddling and romantic relationshippy shit. She said she wants to keep doors open. Is she just saying that because I told her I’m seeing other girls and she wants to play it cool and basically imitate what I’m doing or is that really what she wants.
Like I’m so fucking overthinking this shit. And it makes no sense. She’s just a girl. I can get laid again, I can get someone else again. I already have girls. But just something about her, the way she sucked my dick, all the compliments she gave me, the caring and kindness she showed in person, offering to split the bills and shit. Its like I just have this urge to see her again, I want her.
whytehorse2021 4y ago
You just have to realize that your way of thinking will lead you to behaviors that will scare her away.
[deleted]
mattyanon Admin 4y ago
Mistake.
You want her investing, you want her to pay half, you don't want her to see you as beta bucks.
The problem is that provider behaviour triggers her "make him wait" strategy. She basically pretends to be innocent and asexual to try and secure increased commitment and provisioning. This is female instinct.
The problem isn't that the $100 means nothing to you, the problem is that $100 of provisioning behaviour means something TO HER.
She might have mental illness, possibly BPD., Research "BPD" and "Lovebombing". These girls shower you with attention and compliments, are dynamite in the sack, and then in 6 months time you're sitting in a jail cell wondering what the fuck happened.
Moonraven 4y ago
Ok so the fact that I didn’t let her invest isn’t like “gross run away” to her but more like “secure commitment” ok….. I can still fix it then.
I did tell her I’ll pay for things that first date but I’ll let her take me out for a dinner next time I see her. And I did let her pay for SOME things, I just paid for bulk majority.
I get the whole alpha game, its just when girls act so “beta” and soft and sweet with me I feel like I have to and want to reciprocate. I can only be like a hard ass lets fuck and get lost kind of guy who not very feminine girls.
Diabs 4y ago
Always play it cool my gf tried to "play it cool" with me a few times early days and when I called her bluff she came begging for commitment. they have to know you are willing to walk away and let them do the fighting for you. Because if they aren't willing to fight to get you they probably don't like you enough.
I think it's good if you like a girl allot as long as she likes you just as much. Oneitis is bad but if it's mutual and you don't overinvest, get crazy, go insecure or co dependent and fuck it all up then it's just a relationship with two people who love eachother.
Because all this is hard and hard work relationships have low success rates.