Hypergamy doesn't care about your wants or nihilism. I want a lamborghini. I deserve a lamborghini, my culture shows how everyone has a lamborghini. NONE OF THESE are arguments for why I should have a lamborghini.

If you're looking for comfort and a reason why you aren't wrong. You won't find it. You are wrong.

Now moving on - I don't know the context where Rollo said that, his book is a rehash from the manipulated man, not a bible we all know and quote from.

I assume that it's in relation to the definition of hypergamy. I.e. no matter how much resource a female got from the male, if a opportunity for more resources or status comes up, she has a biological duty to take it - even if she might not want to emotionally due to loyalty or other values. This is the biology definition as hypergamy is a biological term not a sociological one.

In reality there is nuance. If a girl doesn't think she has a shot with the better option in terms of security, she won't jump. If the connection to the current beta bux is greater than whatever she knows she can get from her usual relationships, she won't jump. If the dude she is with is evolving and upgrading and she passes her girls in status and social rank - she won't jump. If she is generally just lazy arse and is having fun, she won't jump until her priorities change and they clash with what her current dude has.

Hypergamy discussion over.

I understand "spin plates" is the usual answer but beyond that, if you're a person who wants deep human connection, what can you do?

All people want that, I am a male whore and still enjoy the deep talks and cozy sunday afternoons. What I don't have is a hang up over sex and don't pursue relationships with women just for my thirst for affection and human connection. This is fucking you up. And ironically due to the nature of women - this is also preventing you from becoming more of a man that has experienc with women, so that they trust you and give you more of those exact moments you crave.

I am an arsehole, but I genuinely say this with love and compasion as I have seen a lot of men fuck themselfs up because they see every chat, every female touch, every hookup as just foreplay to that deep human need for agnolegement. It's wierd man. It feels super heavy energy and you will repulse kind good women that are the exact women you want to be agnoledged by, because they aren't looking for that deep energy then and there, when they are with you.

Even more tragically - all emotionally imature women, crave the same thing. Daddy\'s girls, BPD girls want the human contact, while neglecting the fun, the sex, the growing toghether aspect. Needy unstable women will be the only women that will respond to that heavy vibe if it comes too soon. And when you get to that moment of vulnerability and intimacy - you realize you both wanted that moment to be about you - and then the jack knifes come out and you both feel swindeled and duped.

Aalternatively if you have status and a reasonable age - you might get picked up by a single mom or gold digger that understands weak men. That understand your desperate craving to be agnoledged and comforted - and she will play you like a fiddle.

It's human nature, but try to avoid putting these concepts in discrete boxes. Girls exist on a spectrum and classifying them as "this is a ho" or "this is a good girl" is often inaccurate. Sure each one will lean to a certain pole, but every one will ho given the right situation. The way to protect yourself is to try to not get too emotionally attached, and do not entangle yourself with legal marriage.

It means her feelings are her feelings, and that there's no such thing as "relationship equity". Whatever you did for her in the past, doesn't matter (to her feelings) when a better hypergamous option becomes available.

It does not mean that a woman will always follow through on her feelings though. She might be loyal, she might have a moral compass, she might have self discipline, but her feelings are her feelings.

Don't overthink it, just accept it, and be the best you can be. It's basically just the female equivalent of you wanting to fuck other women. You're polygamous (seeking variety), she's hypergamous (seeking bigger and better). Doesn't mean either of you actually will.

Women want to be with the best option available to them.

If she see's you as her best option, no worries.

If she doesn't see you that way, there will be issues. It's that simple.

Most people, especially as they get older, want a LTR, some stability. As you get older, you don't have the time or social circle you used to have,etc. A LTR has benefits.

What can be done? Don't get married, don't get financially (attached) to them, don't purchase things together, with the idea of stepping out is very easy.

When the LTR is no longer (beneficial) or you have better options. You move on