Hey guys I'm red pill aware but here's my situation
I'm dating a girl we have gone exclusive. She was the one who asked, she always calls me, she wants her friends to know about me and she shows plenty of affection.
I have failed a few tests and I do notice her sometimes trying to get the upper hand and I I can get it back most of the time. She sometimes makes it hard for me to fuck but I do get around that too by pulling back and going again later.
We had a great day and I was on fire one morning best time, did everything right later that day though I had about an hour of just being really insecure. Fucked if I know the day ended up good though.
I do from time to time get really insecure, she's not a 10/10 but I do really like her. Oneitis setting in I know but what's the point if I don't like my partner. I could get other girls I am tall and good looking. she also knows this and gets insecure herself sometimes and was worried I would not wanna go exclusive.
Even though it's mostly good I don't want my stupid insecurity to get the better of me. Being red pill aware I know that she could just flip a switch and be turned off one day for any number of reasons. If anyone's gonna ruin it though it's me with my insecurities. Sometimes I just wanna eject and end it on my own terms while it's still good just because I'm insecure and don't want it to go bad. But the thought of ending it doesn't feel nice. I know this is a gay as post but that's oneitis for you.
Is this doomed to fail
Bulba 4y ago
Why exactly are you insecure? Is this just some irrational feeling? I don’t seem to get it. You just said you have a high SMV and plenty of options, so I don’t get it.
Diabs 4y ago
It sparked when I saw her talking to another guy who was good looking. It was inoccent but I let it get into my head and like a little bitch have been questioning myself since.
Bulba 4y ago
Is there anything about your appearance that makes you feel insecure? What is your current weight and height?
pfeilmacher 4y ago
You sound like you don't know what path you're on. Decide what you want. Make a step by step plan to get it. Then execute.
redpillskill 4y ago
Need some more specifics here man. Tries to get the upper hand how exactly? Makes it hard to fuck how?
I will say this: I went on a trip a month ago with a bunch of people. A mix of singles and couples. One of the couples was this dude, probably 8 out of 10, maybe 9. Good lucking guy. His girlfriend... maybe a 6, no higher than a 7. But every club, bar, restaurant we went to... guys slobbering all over her. I noticed girls would smile at him, waitress was even a bit flirty but nothing like the attention she received. The reality is that it's easier to be insecure as a guy because other guys advertise their interest like crazy, including good lucking guys whereas women don't. But doesn't change the fact that if you're tall, good looking, have a good job and so on you are very well-positioned to do well and you have to remember that.
Diabs 4y ago
I am usually pretty secure and know I have value relationships can bring out the worst in us guys and I have to remember there's a reason she's attracted to me and just be a man. Hard not to slip up though
whytehorse2021 4y ago
The cure for oneitis is not being attached. Attachment leads to loss(this is what you're insecure about). Loss leads to suffering. Suffering leads to anger. Anger leads to hate.
As for her trying to get the upper hand, watch this video by Rian Stone on female manipulation. It's incredible. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_uQQUodgDM
Diabs 4y ago
Thank you I am getting attached I just have to be okay knowing it might not be forever and just enjoy when it's good
whytehorse2021 4y ago
Yup. Even if you put a ring on her she will eventually die. Everybody dies.
theworldiknow 4y ago
I don't think this has much to do with the gal or the relationship. Unless she's testing a lot and doing things to make you insecure.
Work on yourself bro. Get real good at a sport / instrument / your job. (It was running for me - its a good "you get out what you put in" sport) Engrain it in your head that you will succeed when you put your mind to something. This will be a semi permanent cure for insecurity. Obviously its a little more challenging than typing a couple of lines on the interweb, but this is the jist of what you need to do.
Re the girl and the relationship: Be non reactive. Say less rather than more. This will at least keep you from fucking anything up too significantly, IMO.