I know all this stuff is going to sound tedious and immature but im very new to relationships. Im not good at processing this stuff yet.
Been seeing girl for a few months now, were very compatible and I know for sure she cares about me. We have not yet had "the talk" but have been acting like bf and gf. I also have a best friend since we were 14. Ill just refer to her as F and him as M
Were at a bar last night. M is drunk and guess thought it would be funny to put his fingers in Fs mouth. He also did it to his girl. I know it sounds dumb but we were all really drunk. She bit his fingers but was laughing about it like it was funny. M was also doing stuff like pretending to grind on dudes, hes not gay, that was 100% comedic, so im not sure how to take the finger in the mouth thing. Sexually or just drunk comedic shit.
She was being touchy with him after she got drunk. She does this with everyone though. She eve asked a stranger guy to dance right infront of me. She then quickly asked me to come too. Again I dont know if it was meant to be a sexual thing because it was right infront of me, maybe shes just kind of socially oblivious.
While F was being touchy with M she did some weird thing where she made her mouth super wide open and brought it close to his face. But didnt touch.
When I came back from the bathroom I saw them sitting together and their faces were really close to each other making exaggerated "lovey" faces. It was so exaggerated im thinking it had to be a joke, nobody naturally makes those faces.
Im going to her place now to end it and i think im going to have to end my 15 year old friendship too. I dont know what else to do. Please tell me im being stupid and this isnt a big deal.
whytehorse2021 4y ago
Those are drinking buddies, not friends. They sound immature. She sounds like a hoe trying to get you into a gang bang or 3-way with her and your friend or some rando.
Tooktheredpill 4y ago
Drunk behaviors = sober thoughts.
I don’t know her, but it sounds like she’s for the streets. That was very disrespectful behavior on her part as well as his. You may want to consider demoting both of them, because none of this was cool.
Dddinav 4y ago
I did. It sucks and it hurts but you guys are right
Tooktheredpill 4y ago
I know it’s tough, but good on you. That takes balls to do, but at least you have self-respect.
SheLarror1234 4y ago
Nope your doing the right thing bruh.
NEVER in my life (and I lived in the most slutty, sexualized city's) have I ever heard of a girlfriend letting a guy put his hand in her mouth and doing what you said UNLESS something sexual was going on. This girl sounds like a big slut in disguise. Like, she's only pretending to be all loyal in front of you but her real behaviors and wants shows itself time by time. Not a girl you want a relationship with 100%.
They probably already smashed too. Even if she was drunk, she had absolutely no boundary's for you and i guess this is a lesson to you as well.
Your a big bluepill (in this situation) for many reasons.
Because you even have to ask this question. You should already have known that she was digging the guy and ready to smash by observation alone. Trust your instincts more
Because your pretending to be BF and GF on some fairytale nonsense. Even dudes with real Girlfriends are getting cheated left and right. So If it was never official, what are you even doing with her bruh? You can go to her place and "cut it off" but make sure she doesn't clown you and say "we were never even official" to you and the world.
So yea, your frame is pretty much gone with this girl IMO. Cut if off. What i would do with the friend personally is test the guy. I act like i don't care and ask him questions like "would you smash?, did you smash?, she was trying to smash that day bro..etc" Basically just to see if the guy will be honest.
Dddinav 4y ago
But he put his finger in her mouth, she didn’t do it. Does that change anything?
SheLarror1234 4y ago
Him putting his hand in her mouth is a very dominating sexual act. I mean, its by no means normal for your friend to be putting fingers in a girls mouth, let alone a girl you had a relationship with? Its 9988% a sexual act. Its even worst than the guy just straight up grabbing her ass OP. How are you not seeing this?
Because you have to ask this question I'm not even sure if you are aware of this chick actually digging you? Were you her beta or her alpha? You need to tune into your intuition more. You need to be more aware of masculine behaviors, and sexual ones. You already know you were getting cucked, or would have been if that was your real GF. You already know that's overly sexual so IDK why your asking it.
I feel bad for you lowkey. Its sad how you have to ask this question here, but i wont blame ya. Your "friend" was clearly enjoying sexually dominating and flirting with your girl, so he probably had/is having history with her, sexually. A simp would feel angry at the guy for doing this, but reality is I'm sure the signs of her being a big slut was present even before this incident.
Like i said if u wanna see if someone's your friend for real you have to test then. Put your feelings to the side and be a "bro". If you obviously know he's trying to smash, or did already. So just poke at it and see if he's honest to you and himself.
Most dudes, best friend or not are like animals. Also, Its a real thing for friends to deeply desire only what their other friends have. I've had a large % of friends who only really liked hanging with me to get the girls i attract, as the friend dynamic makes it easier for them to pull my girl.
Dddinav 4y ago
Thank you
Ok I’m done with the friend. Is the girl justified though? She didn’t want his fingers in his mouth and we never were actually official. Maybe she would have acted different if we were officially boyfriend and girlfriend?
SheLarror1234 4y ago
Why are you done with the friend and not the girl? Cut off both of them. Don't be that guy who only gets mad at the dude. She can tell you she didn't want his fingers in his mouth but that doesn't mean she didn't want his fingers in her mouth. Naïve
If you want to continue living like a cuck then go ahead and keep making justifications to thot behavior. I highly doubted she would have acted any different if you were officially boyfriend and girlfriend, because the looks of it tell me that your not really alpha. Dont take it personal just observation. Id recommend learning more about female nature if you dont already understand it tbh.
"she bit his fingers but was laughing about it like it was funny."
"She was being touchy with him after she got drunk. She does this with everyone though. She eve asked a stranger guy to dance right infront of me."
"While F was being touchy with M she did some weird thing where she made her mouth super wide open and brought it close to his face."
Op.
[deleted] 4y ago
[--removed--]
SheLarror1234 4y ago
ahgreed
Dddinav 4y ago
She wasn’t my girlfriend officially. We never talked about it.
Does that change anything? Maybe she would have acted differently if she officially was.
[deleted] 4y ago
[--removed--]
shootinglikekobe 4y ago
I don't condone fucking with a friends girl for ANY reason, but for the sake of diving deeper, I assume the only reason he did it was because w/ regards to women, he doesn't respect OP. It's easy to get mad at the friend, but at the same time OP needs to work on himself. The fact that in the moment he didn't even say anything about it just proves my point. IDK them so I can't really assume a profile, this just sounds like what it is.
Another thing, it's not even his girl. They never even talked about being exclusive. Imagine if your friend brings a HO to hang out. She's being mad flirty with you, and you easily pick up on the hoeness. I don't think at all that friend was going to try to fuck her, but reciprocating flirting with a ho who's aggressively initiating it with you? Doesn't sound that bad to me. Sounds like it's OPs fault for not recognizing the type of girl that he's considering committing to. In situations like this, I've usually told the friend subtlely that the girl he's with isn't who he thinks she is. I imply she's a ho or pull him aside to go talk to other women.
Then again I could just be an asshole.
[deleted] 4y ago
[--removed--]
RPEsq 4y ago
I’ve them both and take it as a lesson that the quality of people you surround yourself with matters.
Dddinav 4y ago
Do quality people even exist? It seems this is most people
[deleted] 4y ago
[--removed--]