Recently had a plate that I was fucking for a steady month. Everything seemed to be going fine until one day she was on her period and was acting distant. I just kinda shrugged it off and figure she'd come around. Left for the night then didn't hear for a week. I hit her up next week and we hung out but it sucked, she just told me all her problems and I listened, but was like "wtf was that that sucked."
She asked me what time I got off work the next day and I told her, but I didn't make any plans because I wanted the ball to be in her court and I could feel her pulling away and just assumed her "problems" were made up bullshit to justify her coldness, thinking she was just losing attraction. The next day she hits me up and says she wasn't feeling well still and that we should talk next week. I told her that I hope she feels better but I don't want to just "talk" with her and to hit me up if she changed her mind. We met up one more time a week later and she was hostile towards me within the first 5 seconds of interaction, so I just walked away and was like "lol fuck that crazy bitch" I kept my frame by just walking away because she really just wanted an argument, something I never do with women.
She then comes to my apartment door ranting about her "emotionally abusive ex" blah blah blah and rationalizes her way into somehow comparing me to him. I just said "Listen, seems like you're going through a lot right now. Take some time to yourself and figure things out and when you do shoot me a text."
I never lost frame but I just feel like there was nothing else I could have done to keep her attracted. I let her come and go and never plead or anything but it just sucks knowing that no matter my frame, I still couldn't maintain the attraction for longer than a month. How can I learn from this? I analyze what I did "wrong" in the relationship and can't pinpoint anywhere where I went beta... You're supposed to learn from every woman but if I don't know where I went wrong, I can't make sure something like this doesn't happen again.
Growing 4y ago
Alpha widow. Also, during periods, you should beta. Afterwards, alpha.
alnova 4y ago
Good on you for noticing, dude. But here's a different take. The fact that she's sharing 'soul' stuff with you might mean that she's even deeper into you and she's letting you into her emotional world. After a while of a physical relationship, girls will want to make an emotional bond. This doesn't mean that she's about to friendzone you. It might actually mean that she's treating you as "special" enough to let you into her world, where she clearly feels shame, anger, resentment, fear and god knows what else from the past abuse. After a month of fucking, you might well be her One is what I'm saying. This drama may be her way of telling you that she wants an LTR with you - she's basically slotting you where her ex used to be. I've had this happen to me multiple times with plates in the past. Wounded and vulnerable women are especially prone to this. After this point things get harder, because she'll be suffering a lot if you keep her as a plate and keep denying her LTR status. They can start pleading, bargaining, asking you how you see them, etc. You might get ghosted and she might go out and meet other guys. If you keep up the alpha though they can also get desperately giving at this point and you can have your craziest desires met, fyi. I don't recommend going the LTR route, because she's clearly damaged and it will suck lots of energy out of you and you will have to play tampon. Truth be told though, putting your dick in her now that the genie is out of the bottle will likely end up being pretty agonizing in any case because the emotional cloud won't ever disappear after this point. Basically if you want her as a plate, you're gonna need to get into some emotional management, and that can take a toll on you if you're anything like me. On the flip slide, you might get some crazy sex like I mentioned.
whytehorse2021 4y ago
OK, you need to watch Rollo's video on ovulatory shift. Here's what's going on: During her period she gets all the betas away from her(that would be you). Then the week after her period she's trying to get pregnant with an Alpha(again, not you). Then the next two weeks she's trying to secure a beta provider(you). Here's the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfiL-JjbxSY
IamRedPilled 4y ago
Honestly, I think this is what happened. She was on the pill for the month we were fucking then ran out. During the time she was on the pill, we were having great sex and she was submissive. She ran out of bc and then she did a 180. Running out of the pill started her period again and I think I just got unlucky as fuck because it must have completely changed her psychology going off of it. I don't think I was in the position to be as Alpha as some random dude she just came across because we spent a decent amount of time together, probably too much time but lesson learned.
whytehorse2021 4y ago
Yeah it's so predictable. If you're not the guy she wants to fuck right after her period, might as well move on or up your alpha game. It's funny because once I learned this I observed my wife and she goes nuts fucking me during her alpha week and then it tapers off until right before her period and then she's fucking like crazy and the period halts it leaving me frustrated for a few days and then it starts over. Shark week, as Rollo calls it.
IamRedPilled 4y ago
I'm curious as to how much this changed her psychology. I'm sure she didn't have a period for months and months before running out of the pill. Do you think it's possible that she would be more "in heat" than the typical woman who has her period monthly, making my job to maintain attraction that much more difficult?
Edit: Based upon google, for sure yeah. Kinda sucks but whatever nothing I could do.
whytehorse2021 4y ago
Yeah I think birth control puts their estrogen high all the time and that's when they go for alpha fux, and it also puts progesterone high which makes them want beta bux.
MonkMode 4y ago
Fuck her while she bleeds is my only thought.
She may still come around after some distance.
IamRedPilled 4y ago
Naw bro it's been 2 months... shits over. Also, have seen her around with other dudes.
[deleted] 4y ago
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IamRedPilled 4y ago
Yeah, gotcha. She was the one to hit me up the week after our gay little therapy session but you're right on this point. Will keep it in mind.
Musicgoon425 4y ago
You are her emotional tampon my man.
Here's a rule for you:
If she's not fucking you and wants to spend your time talking about another guy, you're her beta chump. Ditch her immediately and lose her number. You aren't in the running to be anything but another girlfriend to her. Chicks like this aren't attracted to you they need attention. Move on from them quickly.
IamRedPilled 4y ago
Nope, we were steady fucking then she pulled this one day and I pretty much ejected because I realized what was happening. She wanted to keep "talking" and I shut that shit down. After this stuff started is right when it ended, pretty much. I know not to be a woman's therapist.
mr_Tobbor 4y ago
Everything is OK as long as you don't feel how soul-destroying is such a behavior. How long do you think you can stay emotionless, indiferent etc.