Something I'm trying to do is show not tell. What I mean by this is I am very aware
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CAPTAINSKINNYPENIS 4y ago
Fuck, phone posting and I pressed submit before I finished writing.
I am very aware that with my girl I explain when I'm not happy with what's going on. For example, my girl is genuinely busy sometimes, which is fine, but she has a habit of making plans she then has to cancel because she's busy. I commit the error of telling her I'm not happy with this, but then she keeps doing it. Obviously it's not getting through to her. I know the theory, that I need to withdraw attention or apply dread, but I can't seem to withdraw and I instead get into long conversations about how I don't like it, and thus I give her the attention she needs without actually showing her its not OK to make plans she cancels on because she still gets attention from me even when she does that. I know I'm being the salty simp and it's not working, but I'm lacking the discipline to behave otherwise.
Can someone smack some sense into me and tell me what I should be doing instead? Thanks.
unplugged69 4y ago
Hah mate it sounds like you already know what you're doing wrong. Here's the key, the reason why you cannot seem to apply dread and withdraw attention is because you probably have oneitis and you are making decisions from a scarcity mindset. This is why we say spin plates, it makes you immune to this shit because you have abundance and if a bitch doesn't treat you right you naturally gravitate to another.
It's hard but in my opinion your best bet is to downgrade her to plate and start gaming other women, if you are busy with them you are less busy giving her validation for her shitty negative behaviour. You should also read up on stoicism as you need to improve your frame, look up Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, Zeno of citium and other stoic teachers and learn from the ancients.
CAPTAINSKINNYPENIS 4y ago
Thanks mate, appreciate it. You're completely right of course. I downloaded Meditations recently, I'll make it the next book I read after I finish my current one.