So I've heard a lot of people on here saying online dating is stacked against males to the fucking max and, accordingly, favors women to the fucking max. I thought 'Okay well yeah it's probably not great but how can bad can it really be?" So I decided on a little experiment. I created an account in a big city about 30 minutes out from where I live and used pics of a girl I went to high school with. Now let's be clear: looks are subjective. Some of you might think she's pretty hot and others might say she's anything but. I'm very confident, however, the vast majority of you would place her anywhere from a 4.5-6. I'd place her at 5.5. She's white (white girls are generally preferred if we are being honest) and petite but her face will not blow anyone away. It's fine and all but there's not a wow factor I can assure you. So what sort of reaction did this somewhat above average girl get? In 48 hours, she received 657 likes and dozens upon dozens of 'INTRO' messages (I did this on OKCUPID). Now granted some of the guys messaging her were hardly Brad Fucking Pitt. But she did get messages from some pretty decent looking guys, including dudes with fucking impressive muscle mass, generally attractive facial features, and so on. One good looking dude who claimed to be looking for a sugar baby messaged her too.
So yeah it really is a fucking nightmare of structural disadvantage for guys.
Bullish_Business 2y ago
Alpha males are rare. I do amazing on dating apps, constantly dating multiple drop dead gorgeous women and having lots of great sex. I only use Bumble and spend maybe 30 minutes a day on the app spread out throughout the day. The key is acting as an alpha would if you are not yet one. Some things I do are as follows.
Hope this helps anyone who reads this!
splifferoo 2y ago
I like your tips, but I just don’t see what’s the point of the voice messages. In what way does it show that she’s putting in effort, unless she’s doing it too
Bullish_Business 2y ago
Exactly that. Lazy women who don't care will just text. High quality women who are confident and worth the time of a date will use voice messages. It is all part of the vetting process. I then ask for her number, again via voice message, and then call her when I have time in the evening and chat for a bit then ask her out over the phone. Not only does this convey that you are confident but it also is another vetting process to make sure you two will vibe well. I work 24/7 as a business owner so my time is worth thousands per hour so I am not even going to consider scheduling a date with a woman who can't hold a conversation over the phone or put in the same or more effort than I do. 95% of women are not even slightly worth my time and shouldn't be worth most mens time either. Just my 5 cents.
splifferoo 2y ago
I suppose this works for you, but I think that even if the woman is high-interest, she is not going to be compelled enough to jump thru hoops initially either out of fear, anxiety, or both. Sending one-two word openers, followed by asking for her number works wonders for me. I’m going to try your method tho.
Bullish_Business 2y ago
Well, I can report that they do but the rest of your life gotta be in order and authentic. It would be worth a try my man!
BabyUareSoSexy 2y ago
I was at a party yesterday and was talking to a girl who I'd consider a 7/10. She wanted to show me something on Instagram, but her phone died, so she logged into Instagram on my phone. This morning I kept getting notifications, non stop, she forgot to log out. So before logging off I checked her Instagram. It's unreal how much guys are chasing her. So, that's what it's like for a girl. Non-stop attention. I have seen Tinders of ugly girls getting bombared with messages, that's why I don't have social media, it's a waste of time.
Musicgoon425 2y ago
You're looking at the wrong way bro. I do really well online.
First off, quantity doest = quality. Girls have a lot of options, but the vast majority are pure shit. They have to sort through the garbage. Second, the part of your experiment didn't include follow through with messages. A guy could look good and be severy socially retarded or bland. There are many filters a women goes through.
Seriously, go look again and be honest. How many of the guys on there would consider vaguely attractive or have fun profiles? Not much I would say.
Get some good pictures up, message first if you can. You can be bold and message before a like with OKC. If you write interesting shit, you'll get a lot of success.
If you look for reason to think you're screwed, you will find them. It's all confirmation bias. Stop doing that shit.
Intrepid_Place53900 2y ago
agree, I do very well with OLD. I was setting up 3-4 dates a week (I could have done more , I didn't have the time).
BUT, I'm older, going after 30+ women. Really 40+, I have a terminal fear of baby rabies.
I put a bit of effort into my profile, make myself look like a cocky, good guy looking for a LTR. It works very well for me. But the women in this age group are a bit different than the younger girls, looking for different things. Some fun, but with stability,etc.
Now, what is it like going after the girls in the 20's up to mid 30's. I'd imagine the social media sluts are much worse in this range. They are looking for FUN, Best everything cuz I deserve it, blah blah.
I think in any age group, you have to keep in mind the following
If the girl is out for a hookup, or a guy who's FUN, that's what she's looking for. If she's looking for a LTR, it's a different profile.
If you aren't the Alpha Buck, then put a profile out there that would attract a girl who's looking for a bit more. If you are trying for the ONS, competing with the alpha buck, you will not be successful unless you have the physical traits to compete with them.
Not saying ones' alpha, ones beta. You could read it that way. An Alpha for an LTR is not all physical. But remember, A women looking for her LTR/etc, still wants an alpha, she wants an alpha who is stable, has other traits,etc, not just the FUN HOT one. That's where the epiphany stage is, what age do women see this, near the wall, but many do get it earlier, they want a LTR, not just a ONS or fling with a buck. They've had that I"m sure, wears off faster for some than others.
splifferoo 2y ago
What’s OkC?
pfeilmacher 2y ago
okcupid.com