This is probably gonna be long and it does not directly have to do with sexual strategy. However, I do not know where else to turn to and this story does show what horrors BP can bring if you succumb. So please bare with me.
tldr: My extremely BP, low IQ brother and his gf are causing me and my family a lot of problems.
Last year my father has passed away. He knew my brother was balls deep in the shit, a ton of debt, unable to pay his rent, a blocked bank account, so he made peace with his dishreveled girlfriend and asked them to move into the family house for free as long as they pay a share of the utilities and help him and my aging mother. As they were moving back in he already passed away and left the house to our mother, me and my brother. I have long lived outside. Thus, my brother was now supposed to look after my mother as was the wish of my dying father.
It's been a year now and the girlfriend of my brother has since manipulated him and turned him against me and my mother. They react very sensitively to any wish my mother makes, they leave the house in a mess and demand money for any support to my mother. The backstory of my brother: My mother and him were taken to a first world country from a third world one. They would surely be dead if not for him since they both had TB when they arrived. My brother has struggled, has a low IQ and only has a basic job (better than nothing tho). He has always been extremely bad with money, his bank accounts always maxed out. He is an extremely impulsive buyer and a lot of his shit lies around the house still in its packaging. You can't imagine, it is pathological. He even keeps parking in a spot where he gets a ticket, then does not open the letter with a warning so it ends up costing a couple of hundred in the end. He has turned to my grandma, father and mother for financial support, sometimes weekly, and has always gotten it. They always saved him when he was at the brink of total collapse. Even though it was always his own fault. There were even police warrants for his debt.
He has found his match with his girlfriend. She is a single mum of two adult children who both went to a special school for children with learning disabilities and who both stayed voluntarily with the father after they separated. They are not even divorced so the children of my brother have the name of the ex-boyfriend. Do you believe it? She has very expensive tastes and refuses to work. She screams all day long with her children and is very easily irritated. Child authorities came after neighbours complained about the way she treats her kids. The kids are severely underdeveloped, can barely speak (4 and 5 years old). It is all really tragic.
My brother keeps making more demands. Declared "war" on my mother because she said something to the girlfriend. My mother is actually a very polite and timid person and has always only wanted the best for everyone, it is insane to me that they would declare her the evil enemy. He does not appreciate the support my family has given him over the years. He was always in the wrong, it has always been his own making and still, he was saved. And now he can't even appreciate that and threatens my mom and bitches about doing basic shopping for her.
Basically, I feel like my father made their problems mine by letting them move into the house. He also hated his gf and threw her out but made peace with her in his last days, like dying people do. He was the bigger man. I know have to keep in touch with these people because they have to look after my mom. I can't get rid of them since my brother owns part of the house. I have to share in all kinds of expenses for the house with them which they always bitch about because we all own the house. As long as my mom is alive I can't legally sell the house and I don't want to anyway. As of now it is a money sink for me while my brother saves a ton because he does not have to pay rent. The gf has not payed a single cent in all their relationship. I can't force my mom to go into a care home legally and I don't want to.
I hope you take this as an example how making BP decisions with women can lead to utter destruction and despair for generations. I will try to keep contact at an absolute minimum and see that my mom is taken care of. It is useless to ponder protecting the family assets, my father has made the decision to give money to those who absolutely cannot deal with it.

carnold03 4y ago
If your mother's receiving retirement benefits and your brother's productively employed on top of receiving free room and board living in his parents home, why are you financially helping with a property you're not interested in owning? Don't bother replying, the question was rhetorical. Your brother and mother can clearly see that his girlfriend and her brood are psychotic as can you. It reads like your brother, mother, and you have codependency issues.
The most expedient option I can see is that you simply cut them off from any further financial assistance on your end. Just close your wallet. If when your father died, the will made you all equal owners in the home, then pitch your brother a price he can buy you out at. I'd suggest asking for a price that at least allows you to recoup what you've given them so far for the home maintenance and work your way up from there. Good luck.
Virtual_Hall8986 4y ago
You should probably live separately so that your brother won’t create problems for you and mother. Don’t know exact situation with the house, but maybe you can buy your brothers part and evict them. Or just sell your and your mothers parts and move elsewhere with her. I know he’s your brother, but if he fails to see gf’s manipulations he has to be left with her and learn it the hard way. Don’t abandon him though. And about your mother.. if she isn’t actively social or doesn’t have friends, help her to find some communities for seniors she could join, that way she will not be alone and will not need so much care. Seniors can take very good care of themselves, if they don’t feel alone and have someone to talk to and do stuff (folk dances, chore, knitting, involvement into church community). Or you can put her into retirement home, just make sure it’s a good place.