A girl I am dating flaked on me the other day, and gave a ridiculous excuse that shows she (without going into unnecessary detail) has double standards and went against my own expectations.
Initially I was going to be up front and explain I didn’t agree with what she said, but instead, even though it pissed me off, I just calmly messaged ‘Ok cool’, withdrew attention and went about my life.
She obviously feels guilty now and she is worried I’m annoyed because like clockwork she’s been messaging me a lot, and tried to call me a few times and mentioned a couple of times about how much she ‘wishes she was here’. I’m not even pissed that I didn't get to see her; it was more the fact that her excuses didn’t make any sense and showed she has double standards.
Do I just forget about it and start acting normal again with her now she’s all worked up, or do I articulate to her why she has annoyed me, so we are both on the same page and it will ideally prevent it from happening in the future?
chenigmatressurion 4y ago
If you're still sexually attracted to her I'd say just play it cool and use her for what you need.
can163 4y ago
Your response was good. I think you shouldn't tell her about your reasons, because that's where the game is probably over. She will know, that it makes you emotional. Just act normal as nothing happened, ask her when her schedule is free and set up for the next date. If she flakes again, she probably has low interest, then better you go for another girl
mattyanon Admin 4y ago
The time to make these complaints is not when she's done it.
The best time is when she wants something, eg to see you again. If you want to call her on it, now's your chance while she's "regretful" (really she's just feeling the consequences).
I don't think you're applying dread, you're soft nexting.
People don't learn or change.
Give her a couple of days....... hit her up as normal........ then just before you're due to set up / commit to a meet, say something like "and this time don't do ".
That should be all it needs.