I've read the sidebar twice, and I have no interest in exclusivity with this chick. I bring up the sidebar because I wouldn't exactly consider this a "what are we?" question. We met at a party and we've smashed twice, both times not at either of our places. I haven't even known her for two weeks and just now she hits me with this:
"what are you looking for with me is it like fuck buddy or a friend or more? just curious and I'm bold haha"
How would you guys handle this? I want to keep smashing, but I don't know if being too forward or direct is the wrong way to go about this? I'm thinking of saying "I like to take things slow". What do you guys think?
Edit: told her I like to take things slow and she ate it up
J_the_goat92 4y ago
Tell her what you want from her. She’s either with it or she’s not.
redhawkes 2 4y ago
It's the talk, different variation. You handled it good.
Bullshit her until the plate breaks, 'Im open to everything with the right person', 'Lets see where it goes', 'I like what we have, lets not put labels onto it' etc. This ain't leading on, you ain't promising a thing.
Don't play the autistic straight game.
mattyanon Admin 4y ago
Yeah, I like to answer this one honestly. It's a fair question for her to ask.
Women are usually happy with a FWB situation, but don't want a one night stand. They don't like "sex only", but they are usually happy with "sex plus friendship" on an extended non-exclusive basis.
So I tell them "Well, there's no certainties in life, but what I usually like to do is to see a girl I really like, have great sex and fun times together, and yes of course more than once so long as we like each other". Which is basically stating my intentions to fuck her more than once, have other fun with her, but not offer her any real certainty at all (which would turn her off and trigger her "make him wait" instincts).
And I phrase my choice, selectivity and preferences always as "we". So long as WE like each other. While WE want to see each other. This sounds fair and reasonable, but girls always understand that this means I have a choice as well as she does.
This is girlspeak for "I want to date you but not have sex with you".
Be a man, state your intentions, excite her without committing to her.
SteinitzX 4y ago
That's exactly what it is.
Do your usual thing. It'll be fine.
I just saw the edit, so there you go.