i'm almost 16. Next month as a matter of fact. I'm or have been a huge simp until now and loser in general, and i need some advice. So here goes:
as a preface i live in eastern europe, if it makes any difference.
Looks wise i am not the worst and not the best. i am 184 cm tall, good weight(around 80 kg, not a ton of muscle but not a ton of fat either, i am on the more defined side than the average guy in my class, but there is some fat on my legs and lower stomach specifically(which i really need to lose if i want to actually look better and be able to run more than a few minutes without barely being able to breathe).
My face is not really that attractive but not bad either, maybe a 6? or a 7 on a good day. I'm actually able to already grow some stubble so that's kinda cool but unless i shave daily i look like a bum( not long enough to actually connect the sideburns to the goatee so that kinda fucks it up ) One of my big flaws looks-wise would be my posture ( typical nerd posture, also some scoliosis i think, i remember being diagnosed with it a few years back) and my teeth. HOLY SHIT my teeth are garbage. i have a pretty large overbite and a few teeth in the front are crooked as hell ( actually getting braces tomorrow, doc says they'll last for a year or 2.
My hair looks decent once i actually style it i think but what do i know about hair.
With girls i'm awful honestly. The most experience i can remember is simping for 3 girls. 2 a few years back and one last year. The one last year i actually mustered up the courage to ask her out, turned down, maybe she smelled i was a loser or i mistook her kindness for attraction who knows. Other two i can remember( not ones i simped for, others) i remember a girl asking me out last year, a 7 i would say, decently pretty blonde blue-eyed. I just literally froze and walked away. My simp mentality fucked me over bad. Another one i remember was basically simping over me for 3 years, we barely got to see each other (once or twice a year type) but that girl was fucking nuts. One of those "witchesvspatriarchy" type broads in the making if i were to take a bet. Probably HS slut too.
I want the typical white picket fence 2 kids and dog kinda deal but that looks more and more impossible. Hookup culture and the like fucking disgust me but seem unavoidable. Hell i know a girl who on the first fucking day of class this year, before the lockdowns (she's still 15, maybe 16) got a "School tour" from the chad of the class. (she was a new student) Pretty sure he was also fucking the one i simped over and turned me down last year( not sure, i dont know)
I also hate the way most of my classmates behave, smoking like a chimney and drinking like a fish at 16-17. Hell when physical school was a thing they smoked so much that cops had cars permanently in the HS driveway just to catch them. Now given the situation of said hs i'm obviously trying to move out(this one as i said is not really the most harvard-esque of places) but it also doesen't fit me. It's heavily focused on maths and physics and i can barely do those at a 6th grade level. JUST barely.
Currently trying to get over porn(And failing), and i'm not really too addicted to video games, but to the internet in general yeah it's pretty bad
Not really that social, some may even call me antisocial, with some anxiety. i do go to the gym sometimes(haven't gone much in the past week) and i can keep a diet for a week at most. (gotta lose that extra fat before i worry about muscle is the way i see it, what good is being big if i can't run a mile without dying)
My sleeping schedule is decent i would say, sometimes fucked though. I've been trying a new routine: wake up at 4-5, do a little home-workout, shower all that shit, then breakfast and i'm done with all of that by the time it's 6 30. (online classes usually start at 7 so) And this works all right but sometimes( like today) i simply go to bed and even happen to miss my first class
i have a classic and electric guitar too, which i am total garbage at but hey i figured they would be a fun hobby. Now they're kinda collecting dust, it's demoralizing to see how good others are while i am well...me.
So, yea.. any advice would be appriciated.
firmware_pimp 4y ago
regarding facial looks: "My friends say I'm ugly, I got a masculine face" - Tom Waits. Being ugly is manly. Being pretty is for girls.
Also, body composition without a doubt has a huge effect on facial looks, it's astounding. Check out facial differences in before/after physique transformation pics.
Also, check out Jay-Z. Life ain't easy, but looks aren't really that big of a deal.
Also, I myself have pretty decent facial structure, and it hasn't saved me from endless bullshit with women. Being a 8 isn't like some magical ticket to banging Stacy happily ever after. There is just no answer to things like this. Relax and see what you can get out of life.
Re: simping - yes, this is a disease. Become comfortable with this idea.
Re: getting over addictions, two pieces of advice: 1) Exert steady but small effort against your addiction. You don't need to re-format your life to expunge minor addictions; you just need to have a steady long-term effort at reducing them, and building the mental framework that they're a thing to be eliminated, and eventually they just disappear.
2) It's a dangerous view that addictions are vicious and unescapable. I've heard a theory that this view is promoted by the cigarette industry in order to convince people that they can't get out. Just look around and you will see plenty of people who got themselves out of addictions just by putting in mild or moderate effort.
Re: getting better at math and physics from a grade 6 level, see the above. You don't need to kill yourself by studying, you need steady long-term commitment. Develop a sharp sense of "I don't understand this" so you know where to focus and ask more questions. Math and physics is all about developing mental confidence with hard problems. In some ways, the grade 6 level is one of the most difficult, because you're being introduced to fundamental concepts, typically by people who don't understand the concepts themselves. If your teacher is saying some shit that doesn't make sense, consider the possibility that they don't get it. Watch multiple sources; sometimes a different perspective can get you un-stuck. Mastering math and physics takes a solid 5 years of effort; it's not a couple-of-months kind of thing.
firmware_pimp 4y ago
One more comment.
About 80% of 16-year-olds are simp losers. I had a buddy who was quite chadly at 16. By 25, he was mentally fucked and mired in who-knows-what. Now he's coming around again. Life has ups and downs; it's not a platitude to say that things pass. Don't be deluded by people's outward appearances; a huge amount of people are just good at hiding their pain. It might take another 10 years for this to really sink in.
jpwilk 4y ago
Pump iron until you can effectively wield Golic's Hammer. The fittest man in the room always has an advantage. Even at Tiddlywinks.
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Lemmy 4y ago
thanks, i'll give OMAD a try again, it failed a bunch but why not. In your opinion would it be okay to eat more unhealthy during said meal as long as i keep on track with omad? nothing too bad but as an example home made burger and fries or again home made pasta(i'm a sucker for pasta)
[deleted] 4y ago
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