Basically here is my situation I'm 26 with a degree in economics/philosophy. I owe 38k in student loans and not sure what my next move should be. Some background is I was heavily addicted to opiates from ages 18-22 and it put me behind in life. Here are my options, I stay in my hometown a city of 900,000 metro where I have baggage and would prefer a larger city to game.
The pros to staying here is the stability I have a job even though it isn't ideal coming out of college it pays enough that I can live comfortably and my parents are willing to help me financially living in my hometown so I can pay off my student loan debt (can pay off 900 a month living here). The other option is moving to Milwaukee a city twice the size, a fresh start free from my past, and 1.5 hours from Chicago. I could set up in Milwaukee and then in a year try applying for jobs in Chicago (I'm afraid of going straight to Chicago and going broke without a job lined up). The cons to this is lack of stability and not paying off my student loans anywhere near as quick due to not as much parental support.
So should I stay in my hometown where there is more stability or move to another city where there is more freedom? I'm torn, as I tried moving to Las Vegas in the summer and was forced back due to inability in finding a career job and lifestyle I was living there, I know I need to get more serious about my finances but I also seriously don't want to live in my hometown, what should it be, stability or freedom?
abdada 9y ago
Don't move for access to women, move for access to success.
Women are a side effect to being a man worth being with.
You can visit a bunch of cities to get interviews and use couchsurfing to find places to stay for free.
creating_my_life 9y ago
Live at home, save as much money as possible every moment of every day.
Get your shit together. Let your family help.
Find a GREAT career somewhere you're excited about living. Don't do the intermediate move. Too much wasted time, energy, and money.
Aleventures 9y ago
I don't think I can stomach living at home more then another few months, it kills my chances with women. I might still stay in my hometown since my parents are more willing to support me in other ways financially then if I lived in another city.
WhorehouseVet 9y ago
You will never make money chasing women; always chase money.
I always recommend new grads to go where the money is, get a strong financial foothold, then a horizontal or vertical transition.
scarthearmada 9y ago
Note -- pay attention to cost of living and taxes in the cities that you're looking at. You may make a much higher salary in San Francisco, but your cost of living is going to be way higher than, say, Philadelphia or Houston. "Where the money is" means more than just "where will my salary be highest?"
scarthearmada 9y ago
In your mid-20s, any city close to or above 1,000,000 people is going to have a ton of young, single women around. As others have said, move where your likelihood for financial/career success is higher, or preferably highest. If your cost of living in Milwaukee is $40,000 per year and you get hired making $42,000 per year, you're netting $2,000. If you're living in Chicago for $47,000 per year, and you're netting $47,000 per year, you're breaking even.
I personally chose the cheaper city first, before moving to a more expensive city. Great "cheaper" major cities are cities like Houston, Philadelphia, and Phoenix. I chose Houston. Now, I live in one of those great expensive East Coast cities and I'm making twice as much money. But I cut my teeth and gained real world experience in one of the cheapest major cities in the US.
Just remember not to stay there longer than you feel it is necessary to peak at your job, unless you really love the lifestyle that the city offers. I hated the heat and humidity of Houston, and so after three years, I started to look for another city to move to.
Pretty women are available everywhere, if you're making enough money, and taking great care of your body. So, make more money than you spend, pay off your debts, build a career, take care of your body. And stay the fuck away from drugs and heavy alcohol use.
Aleventures 9y ago
The cheapest option for me is easily living in my hometown because my parents are willing to support me in ways they wouldn't if I lived in another city.
scarthearmada 9y ago
As I said, at this stage in your life, you want to increase the rapidity by which you find your way into a higher income level, and become debt free. If you're debt free, making six figures in your late 20s or early 30s, you're doing a whole lot better than the overwhelming majority of men in the world.
Now obviously I don't know what sort of baggage you have locally in your city. If it's something that would seriously harm your professional life, or prevent you from getting dates, well then it's probably not worth considering staying with your parents. But if you just have a shitty ex who fucked your friends and still tries stalking you on Facebook -- well, who the fuck cares? Save money on rent, stay with your parents for another 1-2 years, and then move elsewhere.
But work your way through it rationally. You're not a woman operating on feelings. You're an adult, and a man. What's a typical rent for a small one bedroom apartment in your city? $800 per month in an area populated by young professionals? So okay, $9,600 per year saved by staying with your parents. In Houston, say, you're paying $1,000 in a trendy area. So okay, $12,000. How much more money are you going to be making in the Houston job market versus in your home city? And how much is the new scenery worth it to you?
I moved from Houston to Philadelphia because I can have a whole lot more fun in Philadelphia, and so it was worth not staying in Houston and saving a couple thousand dollars per year in state income taxes. (Texas doesn't have them. Pennsylvania does.) But when I was 25 years old, I chose Houston because I was making good money with a relatively low cost of living for a major city, and was in a serious relationship (and ended up married). I wasn't too concerned with wanting to maximize having fun outside, doing new activities all year round.
Just take your time, and think about it. And remember -- if it doesn't work out, either buy your way out of your lease or move to a different city when your lease ends. You're not committing to either decision for the rest of your life. Just try to do what's best for you now.
Aleventures 9y ago
My baggage isn't like I can't show my face, it's my like my ex-gf dumped me due to my past, I burned a lot of friendships down, like on New Years I was at a party after the bars closed with a lot of people from high school years and I was asked to leave because the host wasn't comfortable having me there, stuff like that doesn't happen a lot but every once in a while does. My city is a really insular city, the social circles were established in highschool/college and my social circle from highs chool I burned down and in college I was high, its difficult to make friends, the ones I have are through pick up. Also small cities aren't good for cold approach, there is no anonymity, you develop a reputation.
scarthearmada 9y ago
A city of 900,000 isn't a small city though. You should absolutely be able to find new social circles, or create your own. But I get it that it may be difficult to find new spots to like in a city with so many blackened relationships floating around.
Have you looked at the salaries in your field in other cities? Are you just looking at other regional cities? When I first moved to Houston, I picked 5-10 cities and put some data together for each one: typical cost for rent, tax rates, salary ranges for relevant jobs, etc.
Aleventures 9y ago
That's the thing I tried moving to Vegas in the summer and getting a job with my economics degree but to no avail. I was able to find an hourly sales job but a career, salaried gig, no luck. I tried in my hometown to get an entry level finance job, got interviews but nothing after the phone interview. I currently have a job doing internet technical support, plan on looking for a better job in a few more months. I looked in moving to Milwaukee and then Chicago eventually, Milwaukee is a lot more live able but if I want to pay off my student loan debt ASAP staying in my hometown would be best because my parents can support me in ways the wouldn't elsewhere. I'd live on my own and pay rent but my parents would be wiling to pay for other things such as gas, groceries, car problems if I was committed to paying off my debt they said.
In Milwaukee I'd be lucky to pay off 6,000 a year, in my hometown I could pay off about 13,000 and more once I get a better job. I want to go abroad in my early 30's and teach as I like adventure and foreign women and they like older guys so you can be in your 30's and be dating 18-19 year old hotties, I have a tefl and getting certified to become a highschool teacher now. I'm looking at sucking it up, living in my hometown for a couple years(get a place with my brother), making the most of it, paying off my student loan debt and going abroad after the debt is payed or moving to a bigger city afterwards. I'll still be able to do damage with the women in the US in the age group I prefer for another half decade at least and afterwards I'll go abroad where age isn't as big of a deal.
scarthearmada 9y ago
Las Vegas is a rotten city constantly in an economic mess. Almost no one is able to get a job in Las Vegas, lease of all educated people. It does sound like it would be a good idea for you, financially, to be able to spend 1-2 years in your home city to pay off a substantial amount of debt. If you cut that $38k in half in two years, by then you should be making $10-15k more per year. At that point, the increase in income will offset the savings of staying at home. And so the debt shouldn't really be overwhelming for you.
As far as a tech job, one thing that I would recommend to you is to start seriously thinking about what direction you want to head toward in your life. If you want to build a career for 3-4 years only to drop it to go teach English in Asian to sleep with cute Asian girls, you're selling yourself short. If you want to teach English abroad, cut your student loan debt in half, at least, and minimize your other debt obligations (e.g., car loans, credit card debts, etc.), and teach English abroad in your late 20s. Don't want until your mid-to-late 30s before you start to pursue a "real" career.
It's not too late at that point, obviously, but it will become increasingly difficult. A huge part of why men tend to be appreciating assets after 30 is that our careers continue to develop, our salaries continue to increase, and we amass more wealth. If you're coming back from Korea or Japan at 34 and only then starting a new career, you've just lost SMV relative to other men who have already built a strong career at home.
Herdsengineers 9y ago
I lived at home after college and paid off debt. Didn't move out for almost 2 years. It sucked, but being debt free was worth it. I also saved a ton of money in the long run because the early pay back avoided a ton of interest.
I could have lived on my own too, but almost 20 years later, I think I did it right.
Aleventures 9y ago
If I wanted to pay off all the debt in 2 years I would most likely need to live at home for 2 years, don't think I could handle that.
Herdsengineers 9y ago
It depends on how things are with parents. Mine were cool. They just asked if were gonna be gone all night to let them know, they never tried to tell me what I couldn't do or not do by that point. I was paying them some rent, a college grad and working professional. I just didn't bring chicks home to screw. Went to their place for that.
I always made sure to lead with i was working, had a good job, good prospects, good future before revealing I was living at home still. That way it came out as I had my shit together, I was making a business decision, it wasn't like I was some loser doing nothing.
It really worked out fine for me to be honest. But that did need parents who would back off and not try to treat their adult son like a kid. I had a higher education, was making more money than they did combined, had all my own insurance, still took care of the yard, cooked family meals, took them out for dinner a few times per month, etc.
I never had to talk to them about it either. Just be a grown up, show respect, and generally things work out well.
RedditAdminsSuck_88 9y ago
You need to have your living expenses as low as possible so you can get those loans paid off. Pick the cheapest option when it comes to housing and cost of living.
Aleventures 9y ago
That would mean staying in my hometown, something I wouldn't mind if I didn't feel such a need for a fresh start.
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