Study that shit. That way you always know even if you go soft, which often happens due to performance anxiety the first time, that you got an Ace up your sleeve.
At minimum, she's getting the equivalent of a really good blowjob.
At maximum, after you go down on her, you're either rock hard, or in a good position to ask her to suck your dick till it's hard.
Aside from that, buy a selection of condoms, and try them on for size.
Not only does this ensure a good fit, but the practice prevents any fuckups when you're putting the condom on.
Other than that, lift weights, hiit running, kegels, and no death grip masturbation.
When you tell a woman you are a virgin, you are telling her other women don't want you. The opposite of pre-selection.
I had a Christian friend who before he got married, he waited until marriage. Virgin until his honeymoon. He was very attractive, extremely photogenic, ripped, cocky funny, confident, and had women throwing themselves at him all the time. He married a hot (but crazy) woman. But when he turned them down for sex and told people he wanted to wait, most women went elsewhere. And these were Christian girls who were also (supposedly) wanting to wait until marriage too.
When I told church girls "oh no, lol, I'm definitely not a virgin", with the non verbal big open eyes, they knew I had been around in life. none of them judged me or lost interest in me. It's like they were understanding. Even though I am average looking. And they would still be interested in me.
Women want men who other women want. It's a shit test. "oh totally a virgin" with a very sarcastic tone. Lose that v card man. Fast.
I had absolutely zero trouble hiding my v card when I actually did it for the first time. As long as you take charge, no girl will ever get suspicious.
It's less about losing the v card "physically" but more about losing it mentally and just being ready for it
When I was a virgin and was talking to a new girl I made it seem like I had been around a lot without saying "I've fucked 20 girls" when in actual fact I'd only ever fingered a couple of girls before.
Just the conditions of where it happened - high school parties, clubs etc. Being young and not having your own house means you don't always have somewhere to fuck.
The biggest problem I had with getting girls is having somewhere to go after I've pulled them.
Many women are self-conscious and shy too so the first times can be awkward anyway.
Edit: Contrary to everyone else, I suggest going for women you're sexually attracted to. No need to specifically try for the bottom of the barrel, go for a girl you'd want to bang.
No offense, but paying for it is probably the best option specifically so you avoid any sort of relationship accidentally happening or anything weird. When I started pout I had too many crazy women after me (which causes some beta behavior if you literally have to hide from stalkers and crazy chicks.) Being a virgin is partially in your mind and partially a lack of practice. A prostitute can help with both, providing you have safe legal access to one.
No lie, "this is what I've been completely frothing at the mouth, burning my wrist out obsessed with for like five years!?" is the first thing that went through my mind.
Then I ditched the rubber and upgraded the vagina and things got a lot better.
Tell everyone that you're an animal in bed. Lie about it. End of story.
People having sympathy for you being a virgin is pretty nonexistent in reality. Girls might say it's cute or that they don't mind... but the truth of the matter is that their pussies will dry up like a desert and every girl who knows will auto friendzone you.
Lie. For real. Lie. It is probably the single biggest SMV hit out there. Go fuck a prostitute. Get over that initial anxiety, get a feel for a couple different positions, what it's like to thrust, what it's like to get your dick in her pussy, etc. Get a fleshlight and practice edging with it so you get used to the feeling (use it with and without a condom). Practice focusing on your breath while you fuck your fleshlight and try not to cum. All this will hugely reduce your anxiety with a girl which will make you more confident which will keep you from losing the next potential fuckbuddy.
I'll never understand this edging thing. Why? What do you gain? Control? Because practice will give you that as well as exercise, good food, sleep, and avoiding drugs (the last one was my problem).
No, it isn't. Do it if you want to and if you are ok with the idea, but if you feel like this is not for you, don't force it.
You'll lose your virginity some day, question is how you want to do it. With a prostitute, it will be mechanical and you may feel dirty, but you know what you're getting and you know she's not judging you, she's had dozens of men who were completely inexperienced. With a hot girl with a high N, you're probably going to be very anxious, she'll know it, and it will just add to your nervousness. It might also end prematurely and you'll definitely feel the weight of her judgement. I'd suggest going with a less attractive girl who has a low N, you will still feel a sense of accomplishment for having done something more sophisticated than opening your wallet. Sure, the sex might not be great (probably won't be), but is it going to be really nastier than fucking a prostitute?
N is the "number", i.e. the number of sexual partners. Standard metric of promiscuity. My experience is that women with high N complain the most about and are the most disdainful towards virgin men, so I'd stay away for a first experience.
Do it. You'll learn if you have performance anxiety. I edited my post above with some other shit you can do. Also, stop watching porn. If you get anxiety and you have a fucked up porndick on top of it you won't get hard and it will start a negative feedback loop.
Your attitude needs to be changed. If you aren't succeeding where you want to succeed, the factor is you. Don't try to shift blame, it's not productive. Admit the truth to yourself so you can move past it.
I've been all over SEA and have fucked numerous women. Yeah culture does make things different, but there are always women who are able and willing dude! Just buck up and go for it :)
It really has value if you have been addicted. But if you weren't addicted in the first place, you won't get superpowers of course. It really depends on the person. NoFap has actually proven benefits and some pseudoscience that could very well be true for some people.
Yea NoFap is legit. I made it 8 months before I relapsed. For me it clearly reduces social anxiety, I naturally hold eye contact, I speak more concisely, etc.
What the fuck, you found TRP today? Go read the sidebar.
Don't fuck a whore. It's desperate and a sign of low value. Even men will think less of you.
Your testosterone levels must be low if you don't need sexual release after 500 days. I don't care what you think no fap has done for you if you aren't getting laid you need to change tactics.
I'm in the Sydney suburbs and that's not my impression. I only have one friend who has ever mentioned paying for sex,and I never have (mid 40's now). There's nothing inherently wrong about it but it's not something most guys do by any means, and it's not considered a common, accepted, practice. Not in my world.
First of all being a virgin is looked down because of the shitty society we are living in. You shouldn't be worried about that.
Regarding your question, I'd suggest the same what others did. Lie about it, don't exaggarate but say that you've had a long term relationship and a few hook-ups. If you had asked this question over at /r/AskWomen, they would propably tell you that "Oh no honey that's not a problem, just be %100 honest to us". But that ain't the truth. Your SMV will drop significantly in their eyes.
TL;DR: Fake it till you make it and make it fast. Being a virgin puts lots of pressure on you and makes you act desperate.
I didn't lose my virginity until I was 24. In retrospect, I could've lost it before, and should have, but I was nerdy, came from a strict religious background, and had zero game.
If you find the right girl, she'll be sympathetic, and might even find it hot that she's the one who gets to "deflower" you.
Honestly, no you shouldn't even think about it. Just lie if it comes up and don't dwell on thoughts like what if I'm shit my first time. If you do then it'll be an issue.
Assuming you go to school still, keep an eye out and learn what girls look like when they are checking you out since they aren't exactly subtle at our age lol. Those are the ones that won't care really. Aim for girls at or just below you in SMV for your time too, since they tend to be so wrapped up in the idea of you they can be up for seconds later on.
Also don't stick around the girl you lose the v card to since that is nothing but a one way trip to oneitis city.
Fuck what you heard about lying. Tell your friends "im a virgin and I want to get laid" be open and honest but you dont have to tell any girl unless she asks just dont act like your something your not, it doesnt work. Dont put on sheilds because thats what prevents girls from feeling close to you. Also friends arent going to help their friend get laid again. But if hes a virgin they may feel more obligated to try and help. If I was open and honest I would have lost it a lot sooner. And when I finally did get laid, it sucked and she was mad at me because she thought I done it before and I sucked. Leaving me feeling not much better then before
Or at the very least if you want to take the advice of everyone else, dont tell girls your a virgin but tell your guy friends. They might pick on you for it but maybe they help you never know.
I asked this because I've been asked this before. She's attractive but I didn't have any game back then and was slightly blue pill so it didn't work out.
If you frame it properly, you'll raise your value while decreasing that of the others. Consider: "Nah, I haven't gotten around sex yet, I just haven't found a person who's truly worth it, you know? I know it's not the norm, but didn't feel like doing it with the first person to come around".
Say something like this, and you're immediately putting the girls who did give it up to the first willing guy, and they'll start qualifying themselves to you. You're also pushing up your value, because you show you have standards, and a mastery over your sexuality (you're not just a horny college guy who can't wait). Finally, never volunteer the information, only give it if asked directly and act as if you don't really care. If your frame is that it doesn't matter to you, it won't matter to others.
Nope, if you are confident and know your selfworth and act to it. Most of the girls wont see a problem. Im a virgin and still had girls too my home that wantes to sleep with me.
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CaptainFalconer 11y ago
Google: Nina Hartley Eat Pussy
Study that shit. That way you always know even if you go soft, which often happens due to performance anxiety the first time, that you got an Ace up your sleeve.
At minimum, she's getting the equivalent of a really good blowjob.
At maximum, after you go down on her, you're either rock hard, or in a good position to ask her to suck your dick till it's hard.
Aside from that, buy a selection of condoms, and try them on for size.
Not only does this ensure a good fit, but the practice prevents any fuckups when you're putting the condom on.
Other than that, lift weights, hiit running, kegels, and no death grip masturbation.
sniperhiding 11y ago
Do. Not. Tell. A. Woman. You. Are. A. Virgin.
When you tell a woman you are a virgin, you are telling her other women don't want you. The opposite of pre-selection.
I had a Christian friend who before he got married, he waited until marriage. Virgin until his honeymoon. He was very attractive, extremely photogenic, ripped, cocky funny, confident, and had women throwing themselves at him all the time. He married a hot (but crazy) woman. But when he turned them down for sex and told people he wanted to wait, most women went elsewhere. And these were Christian girls who were also (supposedly) wanting to wait until marriage too.
When I told church girls "oh no, lol, I'm definitely not a virgin", with the non verbal big open eyes, they knew I had been around in life. none of them judged me or lost interest in me. It's like they were understanding. Even though I am average looking. And they would still be interested in me.
Women want men who other women want. It's a shit test. "oh totally a virgin" with a very sarcastic tone. Lose that v card man. Fast.
farbenwvnder 11y ago
I had absolutely zero trouble hiding my v card when I actually did it for the first time. As long as you take charge, no girl will ever get suspicious.
It's less about losing the v card "physically" but more about losing it mentally and just being ready for it
Hyooge 11y ago
This is a very important point.
When I was a virgin and was talking to a new girl I made it seem like I had been around a lot without saying "I've fucked 20 girls" when in actual fact I'd only ever fingered a couple of girls before.
feelinglazy 11y ago
How can you finger a girl but not fuck them?
ampwyo 11y ago
School bus trips... Choir, band, debate team etc. Football players were always the popular ones, but in debate our trips were co-ed
Hyooge 11y ago
Just the conditions of where it happened - high school parties, clubs etc. Being young and not having your own house means you don't always have somewhere to fuck.
The biggest problem I had with getting girls is having somewhere to go after I've pulled them.
lillojohn 11y ago
Your story is not correct? How could he marry a hot woman if it scared them of?
HarleyWalker 11y ago
He did say she was crazy
[deleted] 11y ago
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lillojohn 11y ago
Okeey and it would be stupid to tell something unnecessary.
feelinglazy 11y ago
What do you suggest? I wanna get laid but I'm not that desperate to paid for it.
GraphicSeniorNudity 11y ago
Don't fuck an ugly chick. Adopt the binary scale system. Yes or no. Fuck the yeses not the nos.
whatsazipper 11y ago
Date women. Escalate. Fuck.
Many women are self-conscious and shy too so the first times can be awkward anyway.
Edit: Contrary to everyone else, I suggest going for women you're sexually attracted to. No need to specifically try for the bottom of the barrel, go for a girl you'd want to bang.
ProjectShamrock 11y ago
No offense, but paying for it is probably the best option specifically so you avoid any sort of relationship accidentally happening or anything weird. When I started pout I had too many crazy women after me (which causes some beta behavior if you literally have to hide from stalkers and crazy chicks.) Being a virgin is partially in your mind and partially a lack of practice. A prostitute can help with both, providing you have safe legal access to one.
feelinglazy 11y ago
There's a story in there. Care to share your experience?
dave_is_not_here 11y ago
Oh grow up. Pay for it.
[deleted] 11y ago
Wish I had done that. Your first time having sex is always pretty bad anyways. It's not special in any way.
dave_is_not_here 11y ago
No lie, "this is what I've been completely frothing at the mouth, burning my wrist out obsessed with for like five years!?" is the first thing that went through my mind.
Then I ditched the rubber and upgraded the vagina and things got a lot better.
Whatdididotoyou 11y ago
Yes. Fuck an ugly chick. You need a practice ride before you put your pride and soul out there on the line.
[deleted] 11y ago
Well yeah you should lower your standards to get experience in the beginning. But hey don't make your pride dependent on some bitch
Whatdididotoyou 11y ago
I know. The pride and soul aspect comes into play once he busted nut getting the tip in. We were both virgins once.... A long time ago for me,
[deleted] 11y ago
Tell everyone that you're an animal in bed. Lie about it. End of story.
People having sympathy for you being a virgin is pretty nonexistent in reality. Girls might say it's cute or that they don't mind... but the truth of the matter is that their pussies will dry up like a desert and every girl who knows will auto friendzone you.
aguy01 11y ago
Lie. For real. Lie. It is probably the single biggest SMV hit out there. Go fuck a prostitute. Get over that initial anxiety, get a feel for a couple different positions, what it's like to thrust, what it's like to get your dick in her pussy, etc. Get a fleshlight and practice edging with it so you get used to the feeling (use it with and without a condom). Practice focusing on your breath while you fuck your fleshlight and try not to cum. All this will hugely reduce your anxiety with a girl which will make you more confident which will keep you from losing the next potential fuckbuddy.
rpkarma 11y ago
I'll never understand this edging thing. Why? What do you gain? Control? Because practice will give you that as well as exercise, good food, sleep, and avoiding drugs (the last one was my problem).
aguy01 11y ago
Because he finds it difficult to get practice with a real woman.
feelinglazy 11y ago
A friend of mine also suggest fucking a prostitute. Is that necessary?
[deleted] 11y ago
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[deleted] 11y ago
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zyk0s 11y ago
No, it isn't. Do it if you want to and if you are ok with the idea, but if you feel like this is not for you, don't force it.
You'll lose your virginity some day, question is how you want to do it. With a prostitute, it will be mechanical and you may feel dirty, but you know what you're getting and you know she's not judging you, she's had dozens of men who were completely inexperienced. With a hot girl with a high N, you're probably going to be very anxious, she'll know it, and it will just add to your nervousness. It might also end prematurely and you'll definitely feel the weight of her judgement. I'd suggest going with a less attractive girl who has a low N, you will still feel a sense of accomplishment for having done something more sophisticated than opening your wallet. Sure, the sex might not be great (probably won't be), but is it going to be really nastier than fucking a prostitute?
feelinglazy 11y ago
What do you mean by N?
Yeah, I want to get some pussy, but I'm not That desperate to pay for sex.
zyk0s 11y ago
N is the "number", i.e. the number of sexual partners. Standard metric of promiscuity. My experience is that women with high N complain the most about and are the most disdainful towards virgin men, so I'd stay away for a first experience.
aguy01 11y ago
Do it. You'll learn if you have performance anxiety. I edited my post above with some other shit you can do. Also, stop watching porn. If you get anxiety and you have a fucked up porndick on top of it you won't get hard and it will start a negative feedback loop.
feelinglazy 11y ago
I'm actually 557 days on NoFap right now. But yeah, thanks for commenting on that.
friestogo 11y ago
You're putting your energy into the wrong things if you still haven't got laid yet.
feelinglazy 11y ago
Maybe, but I live in South East Asia. Women here are sexually repressed. They're not that open to premarital sex.
Not everybody is privileged and live in a huge fuck fest like you do.
Gold_Leaf_Initiative 11y ago
Don't blame everyone except yourself.
You just blamed women, your country, and society.
Your attitude needs to be changed. If you aren't succeeding where you want to succeed, the factor is you. Don't try to shift blame, it's not productive. Admit the truth to yourself so you can move past it.
feelinglazy 11y ago
There is a cultural factor at play. Don't be ignorant.
But yeah, a lot of it is because of me. I'm just not proactive enough.
rpkarma 11y ago
I've been all over SEA and have fucked numerous women. Yeah culture does make things different, but there are always women who are able and willing dude! Just buck up and go for it :)
[deleted] 11y ago
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feelinglazy 11y ago
Let me guess, you're in Thailand? Sexual preference change from place to place. In Thailand it's more liberal.
I live in Vietnam and girls here are Really, Really repressed.
niczar 11y ago
I thought you were going to say Malaysia or some other Muslim country. So it's not a religious issue.
I don't know anything about current Vietnam. So here's what I'd recommend. Find a guy who gets laid a lot, hang out with him, and do what he does.
feelinglazy 11y ago
You said it likes it's so easy. I do know a guy who get laid, but he only game girls in his social circle.
Regarding religious, you have no idea man. We're not religious but we are as sexually repressed, if not more than Muslim.
redpillshadow 11y ago
And you still believe in the value of the NoFap religion?
LiLBoner 11y ago
It really has value if you have been addicted. But if you weren't addicted in the first place, you won't get superpowers of course. It really depends on the person. NoFap has actually proven benefits and some pseudoscience that could very well be true for some people.
feelinglazy 11y ago
I've just found out about TRP today.
NoFap has given me a lot of stuff beside sex. It works man.
aguy01 11y ago
Yea NoFap is legit. I made it 8 months before I relapsed. For me it clearly reduces social anxiety, I naturally hold eye contact, I speak more concisely, etc.
[deleted] 11y ago
Read the sidebar bro. You'll learn a lot about women and, more importantly, yourself.
[deleted] 11y ago
What the fuck, you found TRP today? Go read the sidebar.
Don't fuck a whore. It's desperate and a sign of low value. Even men will think less of you.
Your testosterone levels must be low if you don't need sexual release after 500 days. I don't care what you think no fap has done for you if you aren't getting laid you need to change tactics.
Sign up for a gym.
feelinglazy 11y ago
I'd also want to add that it's illegal as fuck where I live.
feelinglazy 11y ago
I'm not really clueless about this stuff. I knew about this before but then kinda forgot about it.
[deleted] 11y ago
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Burner1701 10y ago
I'm in the Sydney suburbs and that's not my impression. I only have one friend who has ever mentioned paying for sex,and I never have (mid 40's now). There's nothing inherently wrong about it but it's not something most guys do by any means, and it's not considered a common, accepted, practice. Not in my world.
[deleted] 10y ago
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scalentorn 11y ago
First of all being a virgin is looked down because of the shitty society we are living in. You shouldn't be worried about that.
Regarding your question, I'd suggest the same what others did. Lie about it, don't exaggarate but say that you've had a long term relationship and a few hook-ups. If you had asked this question over at /r/AskWomen, they would propably tell you that "Oh no honey that's not a problem, just be %100 honest to us". But that ain't the truth. Your SMV will drop significantly in their eyes.
TL;DR: Fake it till you make it and make it fast. Being a virgin puts lots of pressure on you and makes you act desperate.
feelinglazy 11y ago
Yeah, I know what that means. There's this girl who showed interest in me and I acted all beta and shit and now she's ignoring me.
[deleted] 11y ago
I didn't lose my virginity until I was 24. In retrospect, I could've lost it before, and should have, but I was nerdy, came from a strict religious background, and had zero game.
If you find the right girl, she'll be sympathetic, and might even find it hot that she's the one who gets to "deflower" you.
Whatdididotoyou 11y ago
Lie. You are under no obligation to tell anyone the truth.
Cray_for_the_Day 11y ago
Honestly, no you shouldn't even think about it. Just lie if it comes up and don't dwell on thoughts like what if I'm shit my first time. If you do then it'll be an issue. Assuming you go to school still, keep an eye out and learn what girls look like when they are checking you out since they aren't exactly subtle at our age lol. Those are the ones that won't care really. Aim for girls at or just below you in SMV for your time too, since they tend to be so wrapped up in the idea of you they can be up for seconds later on. Also don't stick around the girl you lose the v card to since that is nothing but a one way trip to oneitis city.
Cray_for_the_Day 11y ago
Sorry if this isn't very clear, I'm really high on pain killers right now.
[deleted] 11y ago
[deleted]
feelinglazy 11y ago
Yeah, I read that book. I even got the whole course (2 GB of Videos)
RedPillington 11y ago
"5? or no 6... hundred... thousand... this week, anyway. i have terrible long-term memory. must be the exhaustion."
EDIT: or smile and say "i'll tell you tomorrow over breakfast."
EDIT2: or "wouldn't yooooooooooouuuuuuuu like to know? hahahaha, how about no?"
GreyWolf89 11y ago
Fuck what you heard about lying. Tell your friends "im a virgin and I want to get laid" be open and honest but you dont have to tell any girl unless she asks just dont act like your something your not, it doesnt work. Dont put on sheilds because thats what prevents girls from feeling close to you. Also friends arent going to help their friend get laid again. But if hes a virgin they may feel more obligated to try and help. If I was open and honest I would have lost it a lot sooner. And when I finally did get laid, it sucked and she was mad at me because she thought I done it before and I sucked. Leaving me feeling not much better then before
GreyWolf89 11y ago
Or at the very least if you want to take the advice of everyone else, dont tell girls your a virgin but tell your guy friends. They might pick on you for it but maybe they help you never know.
feelinglazy 11y ago
I asked this because I've been asked this before. She's attractive but I didn't have any game back then and was slightly blue pill so it didn't work out.
[deleted] 11y ago
[deleted]
feelinglazy 11y ago
You're trolling right?
[deleted] 11y ago
[deleted]
feelinglazy 11y ago
Seriously? Waiting for the love of my life? That sounds beta as fuck.
zyk0s 11y ago
If you frame it properly, you'll raise your value while decreasing that of the others. Consider: "Nah, I haven't gotten around sex yet, I just haven't found a person who's truly worth it, you know? I know it's not the norm, but didn't feel like doing it with the first person to come around".
Say something like this, and you're immediately putting the girls who did give it up to the first willing guy, and they'll start qualifying themselves to you. You're also pushing up your value, because you show you have standards, and a mastery over your sexuality (you're not just a horny college guy who can't wait). Finally, never volunteer the information, only give it if asked directly and act as if you don't really care. If your frame is that it doesn't matter to you, it won't matter to others.
OneTouchHowMuch 11y ago
If you say it with a smirk on your face, it doesn't come across that way
[deleted] 11y ago
[deleted]
feelinglazy 11y ago
You said it because you're getting all the pussy. It sucks when you're a virgin. You'll feel desperate and take any pussy just to lose your virginity.
lillojohn 11y ago
Nope, if you are confident and know your selfworth and act to it. Most of the girls wont see a problem. Im a virgin and still had girls too my home that wantes to sleep with me.
feelinglazy 11y ago
Do you tell them that you're a virgin? How old are you?
lillojohn 11y ago
Im 19 year old and choose to be virgin, because of my faith and pratical reasons.
feelinglazy 11y ago
Dude, you're still young. What do you mean by practical reasons?
[deleted] 11y ago
It means he's bullshitting and he can't get laid - practically of course.
lillojohn 11y ago
Awesome that you know so much.
lillojohn 11y ago
You have more trust in each other when you marry, because you could stayed virgin till mariage.
You can't compare the sex with previous experience.
STD chance is much smaller.
Unwanted pregancy also.
Chance of rape accusations is also smaller.
aguy01 11y ago
If you were a girl, yea.
lillojohn 11y ago
So you were born a failure?
If someome cant get sex when he wants to, maybe that is a failure.
But you have other people that just can have sex but have different standards and perspectivem
feelinglazy 11y ago
So religion. Ok, I won't touch that topic. Good luck on your journey.
lillojohn 11y ago
Did you even read the reasons that I gave?
It doesn't have any connection with religion. They are just facts and it is best in the long term for me.
feelinglazy 11y ago
It's pretty much religion dude. You're just backward rationalizing it. You can avoid pretty most of your "reasons" with a condom.
It's ok though. I'm not here to question or faith or convert you or anything. Live your life the way you want it.
lillojohn 11y ago
Only two of the reasons...
The divorce rate is much lower too.
and Oxytocin willl make you feel a bond with the person you have sex with.
I don't try to tell you that it is bad, but facts tell me in the longterm it could be better.
[deleted] 11y ago
If you were anymore beta you'd come with a questionnaire on feedback assistant.