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IBrokeBenjamin

Posted 11y ago in Uncategorized - Permalink - Locked - 146 Views

Okay so I just swallowed the red pill, and first off my life is already better; I just started college, left my psycho ex, and already have a few plates spinning in the last week. However I'm still having trouble not breaking frame in casual conversation. For instance I just sat down next to a girl in my chemistry lecture and started chatting her up, I overheard her tell her friend about her boyfriend, but I got her number anyway. We went to go eat and at the table I had trouble with eye contact among a myriad of other problems. Can I get some advice on a remedy?

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machimus 11y ago

What exactly are you nervous about?

xwm 11y ago

^ This.

Why are you nervous? You have plates for sex, so if she doesn't pan out, who give a shit. Besides, shes out with you. Boyfriend or not, this means shes interested.

If you want her as a friend, don't, guys make better friends for guys 100 times out of 100.

There aren't really any other options here.

IBrokeBenjamin 11y ago

She's just a plate, but that having been said one of my first since having started here. I'm just looking for a few pointers on not breaking frame over longer conversions, like a meal.

xwm 11y ago

She's just a plate

If you haven't slept with her yet, then no she isn't. If you have, then why are you nervous?

Also, you said "plates" plural, so what if one breaks and falls, you always have more.

I'm just looking for a few pointers on not breaking frame over longer conversions, like a meal.

Let me rephrase what you just asked, and it may clear this up for you a bit.

I'm just looking for a few pointers on not saying what I want to say or thinking what I want to think over longer conversions, like a meal.

All holding frame is, is doing what you want to do, and damn what other people think about it. Either they enjoy your company, or they don't. If they add to your fun, so much the better. If not, fuck em, you are having fun.

Also, someone pointed this out in another thread about conversations today. Its an hour long but well worth the watch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-a1jXgAsQI

machimus 11y ago

No I know what you said your problem was, and my question was an answer. I'm trying to get you to think of why exactly you need to be nervous.

r_a_w_k 11y ago

Books that I highly recommend for improving social interactions:

The Magic of Rapport

How to Win Friends and Influence People

Interaction Ritual

IBrokeBenjamin 11y ago

Thanks I'll definitely give them a look.

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