This post is a more detailed explanation of the concept found in this comment from earlier today.

Traditional marriage

Before feminism ruined marriage, marriage was a lifelong partnership between a man and a woman. (Yes, polygamy existed in many places but that's irrelevant to this discussion). Within this union, the man brought masculinity and the women brought femininity to the table. These two polar opposites worked together to produce a happy and balanced home. While the success rate was never 100%, overall, as a generalization, it worked.

Masculinity and femininity

The polar opposites of masculinity and femininity can be seen in several different ways. One of these is - as giver and receiver. Provider and provided for, protector and protected, go getter and gotten for are just some of the traditional gender roles that come back to the base concept of the man being the giver and the woman the receiver.

When this union works the way it's supposed to work, these two characteristics are like the charge and grounding ends of batteries which together produce a stable dose of power. The masculine is the charge, always out to conquer new horizons and the feminine is the force that keeps him grounded.

For thousands of years, this arrangement worked most of the time because society enforced these roles in such a way that neither end of the sexual dynamic could go unrestrained.

Leaders and followers

In addition to the physical protection and provision that was given by men and received by women, was something deeper - the essence of being a giver and receiver and the deep intimacy that comes with it.

Without the giver, the receiver goes hungry and unprotected. Without the receiver, the giver has no one to give to. Being a provider and protector is built right into the male psyche and brings a deep sense of satisfaction to the men who engage in it.

This partnership called marriage was therefore a two way street. Men gave and women received, men led and women followed. Givers create receivers and receivers create givers. Leaders create followers and followers create leaders. Women need men for their physical needs and men need women for their emotional needs.


Along came feminism and began to fight battle after battle to remove responsibility from women while still expecting men to remain responsible for traditional male roles of responsibility. Many women today are progressive with regards to female gender roles and traditional with regards to male gender roles.

Men remain the givers and women remain the recipients of male generosity and giving. This hasn't changed and probably never will change because it's likely to be biologically driven. What did change was that women used to be receivers and now they're takers. The relationship used to go both ways and now it's a one way street.

As a side note - this one way giving is what's referred to as simping which is the female exploitation of the very deep seated male need to be a provider and protector. Many men wake up as a result of this one sided deal because unlike the deep satisfaction brought about by the giver and receiver relationship - the giver and taker relationship leaves one feeling empty and taken advantage of.


There's a fundamental difference between receiving and taking. The former has been a key element in thousands of years of successful marriages while the latter is a key element in the breakdown of gender relations in general and marriage relations in particular.

As more and more men wake up and refuse to keep on being the givers in this one sided deal, more and more women are asking - where are all the good men? Ladies, you did this to yourselves. You (collectively) became takers instead of receivers. You made the bed you now lay in.