Character building

Living life includes many experiences, good and bad. If you're wise, you learn from your life experience, especially the negative ones. Each new experience has character building potential within it. Each negative life experience has even more character building potential within it.

Live and learn is all about character building, as is growing up and the process of maturation. From this perspective, having had a really rough life has the potential of shaping you into a true gem of a human being.

A person's character is part of the intangible, non physical element of a person. It's manifestations and ramifications may be felt in the physical for better or worse, but character itself is intangible and non physical.

A person is born with tendencies towards certain character traits that are influenced by genes and environment. However, this is undeveloped. Development of character requires work over time and through various life experiences. Therefore, the older one is, the more wise they become if they've been continuously developing their character. If they haven't, the passage of time will make them dumber due to the aging of their body (see next section).

Bodily breakdown

The physical body works in the opposite manner. When you're born, you're fresh and have a clean slate. The possibilities are endless. However, the more you age, the more your body (slowly) breaks down.

The body does go through development during childhood and adolescence. However, once it's done with that, it's slow deterioration and breakdown from there until death.

Scars are reminders of past wounds. Scarred skin will never be as appealing to the eye as skin in its natural state. An older person will never be as beautiful as a younger one nor will they be as strong, as fast, as agile or anything else that involves the physical elements of a person.

As a person ages, they'll become wiser and a better person as they gain life experience from the good and bad parts of life. Their character will develop. As their character developed, their physical body will slowly deteriorate. An unwise person who does not develop character throughout life will become dumber because the physical brain deteriorates just like the rest of the physical body.

SMV and RMV

Men and women find different things attractive from a sexual perspective as well as a relationship perspective. What's attractive to men may not be attractive to women and vice versa. What's attractive for sex may not be attractive for a marriage. A healthy marriage includes a healthy balance between the man and the woman, the sexual and relationship, the emotional and the practical needs to the extent that's possible to do so.

Male SMV includes - strong arms, broad shoulders, chiseled jaw, good posture, good teeth, good hair, scent, adequate length and girth of the penis among other things.

Female SMV included - perky rounded boobs, firm rounded ass, long legs, long and soft hair, soft skin, curvy but slim figure, good posture, scent and adequate tightness of the vagina among other things.

Male RMV includes - smarts, speed, performance (especially under pressure), earning potential, commitment, devotion, authority and strength among other things.

Female RMV includes - yielding, demure, thrifty, pleasant, commitment, devotion, sexual, caring, uplifting and encouraging among other things.

There are certain things that are attractive to both genders. Commitment and devotion are attractive to both men and women from an RMV standpoint, posture and scent are attractive to both men and women from a SMV standpoint. The specifics may be different but the concept is the same. For example, we're both attracted to the scent of the other, but to different scents.

Other things are different, some are even opposites. Yielding is the opposite of authority, softness is the opposite of strength, thrifty is the opposite of earning.

A healthy marriage, is a balancing act between all of these. It's an attempt to satisfy as many needs as possible, simultaneously. Sometimes, some needs need to be compromised but a healthy marriage does not suppress or eliminate a core need.

Example - a man may give up on sexual variety with many partners. Instead, he gets sexual variety with one partner through engaging in a variety of sexual acts. Likewise, a woman gives up on her ability to monkey branch and in exchange for that, she receives lifetime security in her marriage. (This is how it works when marriage isn't broken).

Conflating opposites

When looking for a spouse, men are primarily attracted to the tangible while women are primarily attracted to the intangible. Men go for what they can see now, women go for your potential to change into the man she wants you to be.

One of the key differences between the two is explained in the beginning of this post. The intangible developed and improves with time while the tangible deteriorates and breaks down over time. Many many things can be understood with this premise.

When a man is disgusted by a woman's sexual past, it's because her tangible body is no longer in its pristine state from a SMV standpoint and her emotional ability to pair bond is no longer in its pristine state from a RMV standpoint.

When a woman says - “just because I did “that” with him, doesn't mean I have to do it with you. I don't owe you specific sexual acts. I learned from my mistakes. I'm a different person now”- what she's essentially saying is - I'm attracted to the intangible which develops and improves with time and life experience, especially rough life experience. Therefore, the fact that I went through 5 abusive relationships, did anal and facials on the first date with 15 bad boys and gave BJ's to the whole football team is all the more reason for me to be a better person now which in turn is all the more reason for you to find me even more sexually and relationship-ly attractive!!!

Conclusion

Male and female SMV and RMV have some similarities and many differences. What's appealing to one may not be appealing to the other.

Men are attracted to the tangible, women to the intangible. When a woman demands you find her sexual experience appealing and not disgusting, she's conflating what's important to her with what's important to you.

Many of the core differences between male and female attractiveness from a SMV as well as RMV perspective, comes back to this core idea that men are attracted to the tangible and women to the intangible.

Cheers!