What are TRP's thoughts on swinging?

I dont want to have sex with just one person for rest of my life, so think its totally unreasonable to expect someone else to want to.

So if I had been in an LTR or marriage for long enough and I thought it was heading towards dead bedroom, I would probably suggest we do swinging. NOT CUCKOLDING (fuck that), but yknow threesomes (alternating between MFF and MMF) and its just sex, no emotional attachment.

I think think that would help a long way to maintain life in the marriage / LTR

I agree, don't marry, I'm confused why the men on this subreddit are even thinking about getting married ye all seem to hate women why would you marry one?! Hell why do ye even date women?! .... It's confusing.

50% of marriages fail. The remaining 50% that do go on, 1/3 of them are sexless. So if you get married there is 66% or 2/3 chance it will either end in divorce or sexless.

Marriage was supposed to ensure sex for the beta male; now because that's no longer the case our society is crumbling.

I was married. It ebbed and flowed. We had lots of sex on vacations. We had some fun with role-play. Sex was about 2x a week even after many years of marriage. She eventually cheated though. That was the end of my turn. Now I am looking for a new player for this multiplayer game ????

No shit. The deadbedrooms subreddit is an endless supply of testimonials validating Red Pill truths. Of course if you try to tell them this or tell some sad sack to man up, lift, and stop being beta bux they will shadowban you.

B-b-b-b-but mainstream said sex isn't important and true love conquers all? Right? Riiiiiight?!

The answer isn't to not marry, it's to marry the right person or not marry at all.

And about 20 million of those 40 and being dicked down on the low by the same 2 million guys. That's some statistics for your ass. If she doesn't fuck you like she's trying to make sure you don't stray, then it's not love.

Marriage is out dated, like most doctrines that societies still show blind loyalty to. Marriage in no way benefits the male. Yes, court systems are starting to show a big change compared to the last 20 years. But, why go through the shit in the first place? Do you really want that T-shirt?

But marriage is not about sex you misogynist hairy pig.

[deleted]

There is not a woman on the planet that will not get bored of you after a few years. You can be Chad, Alpha, or whatever the fuck, but you are still a the same guy that she has already slept with hundreds of times. Furthermore, she honestly might not even want to sleep with another person, but the thought of going through the motions with you is nauseating. You can't change that. Don't try. 34 year old male that no longer wants to have sex with someone who shows no interest in sex with me, so i guess I'm done with sex forever now with my spouse. It's ok though, I can accept it. If you can't accept this happening to you, DO NOT FUCKING GET MARRIED.

And this is why I am able to understand people who cheat. Society portrays cheaters as assholes and incels, but noone really asks the question why they fucked other women.

No matter how loyal your dog is. So often have I read that a dog's love is unconditional, and this is total bullcrap. As soon as you stop feeding it properly and someone else does, he would give you the big middle finger if he could and live in his new masters place if the master allowed him and there was no legal objection to that.

If they can't fuck their own wife, they will look for someone that wants to get laid. If you get laid with other women, there is something wrong with your wife. If you can't get another woman into your bed, there is something wrong with you.

And thats why prostitution, strip clubs and escorts services are killing.

The claim is incorrect. There are only around 60.3 million people married. So, well over half are in sexless marriages.

ProTip:

Tell her on the 3rd or 4th date. Field Report: I've been with the same ltr for 5.5 years. I told her the night of our third date. Almost verbatim I said " I will never get marrier again, my first marriage cost me $$$. Therefore I will never get married again. I don't want to be dishonest with you. If this upsets you we can have dinner tonight and part as friends. But just so you know I will never say I DO BECAUSE I DON'T! "

Good luck my friends.

Just buy the book, read it and do the work, it's not easy but it's worth it; if you don't have time to buy it and read it how are you going to have time to fix the marriage?

Legit CNN source.

Moment you said that you lost me. Remember the last presidential election cycle? They would run with anything that wiffed a tinge of their agenda no matter how bad it actually stunk, fact checking be damned.

Back to topic, marriage is a useless vestigial function in society today. The original laws were fine. Over time lawyers and political activists (feminists and their male sympathizers) began to work around the marriage laws. Now we have a system where marriage is abused, no benefit for the men either way but all the benefits for women even if they break the contract. The laws were danced around, made fun of, and taken advantage of for so long that marriage as an institution is not what it used to be. It's a farce. It's a parody of the original intent. It's been legally neutered thanks to feminism getting it's way. Luckily it's still optional so best to avoid.

My brother provided for his family as the sole breadwinner; his wife was belligerent for years - in front of our mother and myself, berating him, badmouthing him, etc.

One day she invites her old high school friend to move into their basement; the woman is not at all attractive, but one day my SIL catches them in the act; it has possibly been years since SIL have given any to my brother (although she herself is obese and he may have lost interest).

I know that my brother had to take care of things...er...manually. Once he accidentally left some lube in the bathroom, and their daughter asked what it was; SIL made daddy explain to his (13-14 y/o?) daughter what it was for.....

Now SIL, who has for many years been a screaming shrew, is in a position where she will likely think she holds the moral high ground in all things, and will berate him even worse - probably forever.

She cost him his job as she would complain to his work about his schedule (she needed him home to do chores); now they are both unemployed and may lose their house, with three kids to feed.

Everytime I read something like this, I think wtf is wrong with this sub. Then I realize it's in America, and sadly probably true. The dating (and marriage) culture in USA is so fucked up.

In almost every LTR I've been in, after a year or so, its most often her engaging or taking the initiative to sex...

Maybe a third of american married men are really shit in bed?

Legit CNN source.

this is divorce lawyer marketing spam on ireport. ireport is CNN's UGC section... anyone can post anything there.

I recently broke up with my LTR of a few years. Fighting had gotten pretty bad and consistent, but she recently moved apartments and jobs so I thought it was just stress.

Last week two nights in a row she refuses to have sex, and not in a normal fashion. We started hooking up both times and she stopped, cold turkey, in the middle. She claimed she was tired and feeling sick, but I knew she wasn't, I've seen her before when she is truly tired or truly sick, and this wasn't it. Something was different, for the first time in the relationship, she actually did not want to have sex with me.

The first night it happened I gave her the benefit of the doubt and just sucked it up. Then when it happened again, I called her out about it and her reaction was so bizarre, it's like she was trying to convince herself she was still in love, but clearly wasn't. I told her that she needed to leave, she got an Uber and went home.

She comes over the next day to try to apologize and flirt with me. I was sick of giving her multiple chances for stuff, not just sex related, but also with her irrational anger and temper tantrums. I didn't allow her to try to hook up or stay long, I already had her belongings packed and ready to go, so she took them and left. We haven't spoke since.

Moral of the story - when a girl with a previously healthy and aggressive sexual appetite all of the sudden stops wanting to hook up with you, it's over. Best to cut her lose and start with someone else.

It's also funny, because I deleted all of our pictures that we had together on Instagram. I haven't told anyone about the break up, because I don't care to and it's no one's business. But what do you know, women I used to talk to are all of the sudden magically reaching out, wanting to get drinks / hang out etc (even women that are friends with her). Just goes to show the true nature of women

I just got divorced earlier this year. I worked out of town a lot and my wife basically stopped having sex with me so I started seeing other women. she knew I was doing it because i told her. after years of divorce threats and horrible behavior i was done. i basically told her I was tired of no sex and the ball was in her court. i was with her for over 20 years and i could write a book about all the crazy shit she had done. she had manic depression and i struggled with getting her the right medication and help. i would come home to a house that was painted 9 different colors with a yard that looked like a mine field. the worst part was her violent mood swings. i stayed as long as i could so she would have insurance and to save her from herself. as bad as she was i still regret seeing other women before the divorce was final .

The best thing that ever happened to me was my divorce.

I was engaged to be married. She was the first real long term gf I had. After many years, she wanted it and I just figured A) I should because "it's what people do" and B) I didn't want to give up the regular sex that always took a lot of effort before her. She finally told me to propose or she'd leave, and I proposed. We set a date in 9 months.

She slowly started changing, becoming more of a controlling bitch and losing her frugality. Suddenly, nothing was good enough, or I should say, expensive enough, for her tastes. She was basically laying down the law of how things would be and they were going to be completely different from the way we were before. If I didn't like her spending habits, I could just work longer.

Her friends started in on me, telling me we had been living too frugally. Her mom started in on me, telling me that "modern men" now did half the housework, even if the mom was not working.

Fortunately, my needs did not move to second place behind hers. No, that would be too good for me. My needs simply became irrelevant. SHE would tell me what I wanted. It was as if the world just became this giant manipulation factory for me to work more and expect less.

So I GrewAPair and bailed, ten days before the wedding. The pretend love then evaporated and she backed a truck up and took everything while I was at work. I considered myself lucky to have gotten off that easy.

My fears were ungrounded, I had a new GF who tried to start sleeping with me more than I was asking for before the ex had even moved out.

I've started several successful small businesses that are entirely mine, and I don't have to share half with someone who didn't build them. Marriage usually means giving 60% of your stuff to the person you hate most in the world.

When they pressure you, and they all do, hold on as long as you can and then bail. Her friends and family will shame you, but, no one else will care. She threatened to tell my employer so I just told them in advance and a number of men in senior positions told me they had done the same thing. It's so common to bail that the White House will send congratulatory letters for anniversaries, births, etc. upon request, but they have two categories they refuse to do until AFTER the event, and that's births and weddings, because so many of them never happen.

Now with more than 10 years behind it, it was one of the 5 smartest things I ever did. Do Not Get Married.

Married Man Sex Life Primer, read it, before I read it we had sex once a week (which I never thought was enough), now it's 2-3 times a week; when I read the book I couldn't believe what women will do (started me reading red pill stuff), but after I changed my behaviors and worked out a lot everything got better; read that book and apply it, he is right on. The part that really got me was he talks about a wife drip feeding you occasional sex (and occasional hyper sex) just to keep you hooked; he even says in one part, if a woman told you in 10 years you'd only be having sex 5 times a year you'd just laugh and tell her good luck; if there's no sex it's just a financial partnership, keep that in mind

a sexless marriage (having sex less than 10 times a year)

All the guys having duty sex once every two weeks... once every month.... those guys aren't included in the stats. Conversely all the short term relationships and newlyweds ARE included. That's why it's only a third.

Realistically more than half are sexless to a more reasonable definition (sex less than 2x per week). Now discount the short term LTRs and the newlyweds from the stats, and you're looking at the vast majority of LTR's and marriages being sexless after 5 years.

Everyone here says this stuff. We know how it works. We know what happens. We've seen it play out countless times. Guys.... pay heed. She isn't a highly sexed unicorn, you're high on your own brain chemicals and so is she. Don't expect the honeymoon period to last.

Women very quickly are aware of sex as a token and are quick to weaponize it to their own benifit, no matter how alpha you are once they set their claws in to you and know that they are the only source.

Exactly. And this weaponisation is partly (but not totally) logical, it's how she FEELS. You have limited options, therefore she FEELS that her sex has massive value to you, therefore she FEELS unattracted, and FEELS you should do more housework after you risk your life in your dangerous job all week.

Think the sight of you on your hands and knees scrubbing the floor is gonna excite her?

Then you hear "it's normal for wives not to fuck their husbands" and this is mostly true. You'll hear shaming language "I'm not your whore!" because that's how she feels - like a whore (and not in a good way) .... because having negotiated-sex with a man she is no longer scared of losing isn't fun. He's not attractive. He's doing-things-to-get-sex (or worse: approval), and so when he complies she's doing sex-for-favours. Not sexy.

But she doesn't understand this dynamic (determinedly so). It makes her look bad, so she won't admit any of this to herself or anyone else. Instead she blames the man, and demands he makes her feel attractive as a condition of sex. A billion flowers and a trillion words won't work nearly as well as a little dread game...

So this is what you get in a LTR after a few years...... What... did you expect gratitude for your giving up your dreams, making your marriage vows, lifelong commitment, and grinding away for decades to support your family?

The only thing you're buying with a marriage is your own enslavement and obligation. Societally enforced. You think your friends will be happy with you when they hear you left her "just because of a silly little thing like sex"? They aren't going to back you up in case their wives disapprove and they lose their monthly duty-sex.

I went through it. You'll go through it.

I spotted this happening in my exclusive LTRs too. 2-3 years in, the passion fades and the demands start to increase at the same time. Usually she puts on weight too. The deal goes from "sort of ok" at the start to "fucking terrible" at the end.

If you provide for your family and don't get sex freely you are in a very bad, unfair and exploitive situation.

Yes, and noone cares. The law says she doesn't have to have sex with you...... but she can demand money and commitment..... and ultimately if she leaves, you'll be paying alimony and child support and not even getting duty sex. Although ironically you'll probably have more sex with your wife if you DO get a divorce, and certainly more sex with other women.

And let's not forget this study also applies to LTR's, not just marriages.

I looked around at all the marriages I knew... the only "successful" ones involved devoted men with moderately unattractive women. The rest are a fucking shitstorm of misery. None of them are even close to what I'd want.... and now I know why: women are simply not suitable for LTR's. It's not in their nature for them to work.

Why the fuck men continue to be faithful when their partners have sexually checked out is beyond me. But at least studies like this show you what you're in for if you do decide to commit to a woman.

[deleted]

Ok so after not getting marriage before TRP and freaking out over the idea after trp , can anyone please explain to me how does exactly the average joe go through the whole sales funnel for the thing and what is he gaining or contributing to?

you loose a lot of money, lost identity, lose most of your quality time, have stress, disrespect from society etc. Let's assume it actually goes very well over time, better than 70% of cases. what do you exactly get? regular sex with the same woman? status in your community? sense of completing something properly?

Even at the point of pregnancy there is higher roi to bail and pay your bills, while deciding how to get custody in your legal situation.

I feel sorry for you mfs in countries where prostitution is illegal.

When you learn all you need to be balls deep in 8/10 is a phone and $80, it really changes your whole perspective on sex and women. Like looks mean very little to me now bc looks are very cheap to acquire, A1 personality tho, that shit is hard to come by.

Thats why 6 yrs into my LTR my gf still craves my dick. Bc sex is the only power she has, but since I'm always just one phone call away from being balls deep in a bitch, no woman can use sex to control me

It's easy to dismiss TRP discussions as incel, angry sexless betas being angry and amplifying minor issues. The reality is that a big chunk of normative, "mature" relationships end the same way.

most people will... but then it's A THIRD of your population, you should be looking at why and how this happened.

I come from a Muslim background, I don't practice it but now I realize they are the most red pill Alphas ever. The American – Christian marriage is the most blue pill beta shit I've ever seen. In Islam, the woman must take care of her man and his sexual needs. If she cannot fulfill those needs then he has the right to request another wife. Think about that. Women cannot use sex to gain the power in the relationship. It's like oh honey, you don't want to have sex, that's fine I'll just get another wife, I mean, what's the point of me taking care of you and paying for everything if you don't want to have sex with me anymore. In America that's cheating, and would just speed up the inevitable divorce, unless the man cheats secretively. I believe during this process the woman is also cheating either at work or at home while she is cooking for her man at work. They desire it too.

"Legit CNN source" that was sarcasm, right? CNN is the biggest fake news outlet out there.

As a single man from India, I am terrified at the rate of destruction of the marriage system in America and the western world. Here, the gynocentrism is in the toddler phase but with the hook up culture slowly on the rise, in less than three decades or so, we men in India might be facing a similar situation.

Marriage without a hard prenup often removes any incentives to please. Removal of those incentives often leads to a relatively rapid decline. It's not just her controlling the sex, it's also a less attractive, less pleasing person than what you started with. Neither of you are as interested in initiating. Cultural networks can sometimes also help at least with social pressure to maintain appearances.

You forgot to add option D. Go to Married Red Pill and learn how to be a man within marriage. Maybe the consequence of reclaiming yourself will be increased frequency and quality of sex. Option E. Get a divorce. If you are not getting value and what you want out of her, then it is time to move-on.