Teasing is one of the most misunderstood concepts in men’s dating advice. Some men avoid teasing women because they don’t want to be ‘mean’. Others avoid teasing because it’s ‘not natural’.
Despite what most people think, teasing is one of the most fundamental skills for attracting women. Teasing can make the difference between a platonic interaction that ends in, “it was nice meeting you,” and a sexually charged interaction that ends in a bedroom.
In this article, you’re going to learn exactly why mastering the art of teasing women will take your game to the next level. Then, you’re going to learn a step-by-step system for teasing the women you meet (in a way that instantly sparks attraction).
Why Teasing Works
We communicate with women on two levels: logical and emotional. Once, I approached a beautiful woman and said, “You’re absolutely hideous.” Logically, you’d think I was being an asshole - and that she should slap me.
But that’s not what happened. After I told this stunning girl she was hideous, she burst out in laughter and said,
Who are you? I like you.
And, five minutes later, she asked for my number.
Logically, I was being a dick. But emotionally, I was showing this girl that I don’t give a fuck. A beautiful woman gets hit on by thirsty guys every day. But she rarely meets a guy who’s willing to challenge her, who’s willing to reject her. And when you tease a girl, the underlying emotional communication is that you don’t care if she leaves or stays.
Most men try to attract women logically. These guys shower women with positive attention, (I.E. “You’re so beautiful.”)
She already knows she beautiful. She already knows most guys she meets want to fuck her. There’s nothing exciting about meeting yet another guy who’s willing to bend over backwards to get with her.
Teasing shows that you don’t care whether this girl likes you. As soon as a woman doubts whether or not you’re attracted to her, she has an incentive to start chasing you (of course, you need to have made a positive impression for this to work: https://redpilltheory.com/2018/03/31/how-to-be-an-attractive-man/ )
Is Teasing Mean?
Teasing a girl is inherently risky. If you tease a girl in the wrong way, you may offend her.
However, the real reason most men have trouble with women is that they don’t take enough risks. If you don’t risk offending a girl, then you also don’t risk turning her on.
Risk taking is attractive because it shows a high degree of confidence. If everything you say is agreeable, women will feel that you must be a people pleaser who doesn’t say what he really thinks.
If you tease a girl well, you will rarely offend her. Instead, your teases will make her laugh – hard. She’ll be grateful that you’re not yet another nice guy who puts her on a pedestal.
Teasing isn’t mean, it’s challenging (and women love a challenge.)
Is Teasing Unnatural?
Many guys don’t want to use pickup techniques like teasing or disqualification because it’s not ‘natural to their personality’.
There’s a serious problem with this line of thinking.
First, the desire to ‘just be yourself,’ is an excuse to stay in your comfort zone.
The first time you try teasing a girl, it is going to be uncomfortable, and possibly even awkward. But that’s not because teasing is inauthentic to you, it’s because you’re inexperienced with it.
Think of the protagonist in your favorite movie. Does Marlon Brando seem inauthentic when he’s portraying Vito Corleone? Does Brad Pitt seem inauthentic portraying Tyler Durden in Fight Club? Of course not.
Actors learn how to completely transform their personality, and they do so without sacrificing authenticity. Expanding your personality to become comfortable with teasing takes practice, but saying it’s ‘just not you’ is nothing more than an excuse.
Anything you do that expands your personality is going to make you feel uncomfortable at first. For example, if you’ve never approached a woman before, you’re going to experience intense anxiety on your first attempt .
Does that mean approaching women is ‘unnatural’ to your personality? Of course not, approaching women is just out of your comfort zone.
If you don’t try things that are uncomfortable, you’re not going to grow – that’s the inescapable nature of change. On your first few attempts, teasing a girl might make her less attracted to you. But if you push through the initial awkwardness, you’ll be able to use teasing to effortlessly spark attraction in women.
How to Tease A Girl
We’ve established how teasing works, but how do you actually do it? In this section, I’m going to teach you a simple, yet effective way to tease a girl.
The initial moments of conversation with a girl can feel like an interview. You can inject some teasing here to add emotional charge to this phase of an interaction.
Whenever a girl answers a basic question, tease by saying, “You would be…”
You: Where are you from?
You: You would be from Texas…
If you do this in a playfully challenging tone, she’ll either laugh or she’ll ask, “What do you mean by that?” (To which you can respond, “It’s not important, anyway…”)
If your delivery is off, she may become a bit confrontational and say something like, “What’s wrong with Texas?”.
If this happens, it’s okay. Just respond with something to the effect of, “Oh, I didn’t mean that as an insult. I think Texas is cool. What part are you from?”
You can use this template for pretty much anything she says. If she says she’s a nurse, “You would be a nurse.” If she says she likes to hike, “You would like hiking.”
A tease doesn’t have to make perfect logical sense to have an emotional impact. The power in the statement is that it sounds challenging without being insulting. Deliver it well, and this one line can spark attraction in what would otherwise have been a platonic interaction.
There’s a million other ways to tease a girl.
You could tell a beautiful girl, “Maybe you hear this a lot, but you could be a model.”
She’ll say, “Thanks!”
Then you can reply, “Yeah, you have such great hands, you should definitely consider becoming a hand model.”
If a girl says she’s from Ohio, you could respond by saying, “That’s cool. You’re the most interesting person I’ve met from Ohio all night.”
You don’t need to memorize a long list of lines. It’s better to practice teasing with a template like, “You would be…” because once you get comfortable with that line, you’ll develop an intuitive understanding for teasing. Then, you’ll be able to come up with your own teases automatically while you’re interacting with women.
Conclusion: How to Tease A Girl And Spark Sexual Attraction
Teasing gives an interaction tension. That tension is what excites a girl to start pursuing you.
To be fair, there are other ways to create tension in an interaction:
- You can hold strong eye contact.
- You can disagree with something she says.
- You can use disqualifiers.
Use all the above tools to create tension in your interactions. If you currently don’t use any of the above techniques, start by learning to hold strong eye contact (because it’s the single most powerful technique for building attraction).
Once you get comfortable holding strong eye contact, experiment with teasing. Once teasing become automatic, practice using disqualifiers.
Teasing may feel unnatural. It may seem mean. But if you put a genuine effort into learning how to tease a girl, you’ll find that teasing is a fun way to create sexual tension.
You can follow me on Snapchat to see daily infield footage (approaches, pulls, etc. Guys often message me saying that seeing my snaps motivated them to take action. Username: AveryGHayden