Upon returning home, I had a quick flick through my previous comments to remind myself what I said I'd do. After noticing a couple of comments sitting in minus figures, I re-read them so I could have a laugh at what silly newbies were getting upset about... basically that I wasn't providing help to the specific standard that they demanded. Take a break here so you can have a good laugh at how entitled that is.
Let me tell you something right now, I (nor anyone else on TRP) is here to lead your life for you. There is only one person who can take the lead in your life and who is best suited to lead you... that is YOU. You should already have a reasonably good idea of your strengths and weaknesses. Since you know these more intimately than others, you're in a much better position to make the decisions for that person.
Now this is one of the little nuances of TRP that gets misconstrued all the time. It's why TRP is called dogmatic and dictatorial. Which it is to a certain degree, a necessity in order to maintain the quality of the area. If you want to disagree with the basics, then head on over to purple pill debate. We don't have time to keep having to rejustify the sidebar every time a newbie shows up. The attitude is: if you agree, then come read more. If you disagree, there's the door. It's pretty simple and actually more libertarian than you'd think since it emphasises a space for individual decisions. For leadership of your own life.
One of the biggest problems in the modern western world, due to the feminisation of it, is this submissive and indecisive attitude which is being taken up by so many. These people don't want to make decisions because they might make the wrong choice. Instead they look to someone more qualified to make the decision for them. As logic, this isn't a bad idea. Unfortunately life does not operate on pure logic or frequently allow you second chances or perfect scenarios. It's a messy, ugly, irrational world you're dealing with that has little bits of logical sense scattered here and there. There is a reason we developed irrational instincts... because they worked in a pragmatic approach to things we don't 100% understand. And because they're irrational, they too are not going to work correctly 100% of the time either. We are all making educated guesses about most things in life either because we don't have all the facts or we don't have the time to analyse things properly. This isn't bad in and of itself... it's just the reality we have to accept and base our decisions upon.
So this brings me to something that raises the fear many guys have when it comes to taking command of their own lives: You're going to fuck up. You're going to make bad choices. You're going to look back and realise you did something wrong and you're going to have to pull it back together, get up, dust yourself down and carry on. And it's not because you're beta. It's not because you didn't get the right advice. It's not because you didn't do the right reading. It's because you're a human being and humans are prone to error. When you're living in a world where behaviour is sometimes rational and sometimes irrational, it's not surprising that you can't figure out which is going to happen on every single occasion. It's normal. And it's normal to feel a little upset or sad or angry when things don't go right. That's natural emotion. Nothing wrong with it. (Just don't be sharing that heavy stuff with women.)
However, you need to start taking those risks. You need to make those fucks up, because even if you make a decision and it's wrong... YOU made that decision and you led. This is the goal for all TRP apprentices. You may seek advice and do reading... but don't look to anyone else to sit in your shoes and say what they'd do... because they're not you. I can react as me to a chick you describe... but ultimately only you can decide:
- how you'd best react to that chick.
- What interests you should be pursuing.
- What style best suits your features.
- What attitude and style of game will work best for you.
It's important that you take the lead on these individual aspects instead of asking for others to do it for you, because these issues are personal and if you try to fake being a different type of alpha to your own style... women will sniff it out and sense there's something fake about you. The end goal is to make your attitude, style of game and dress sense seem natural. Look at what you could be... not who is most successful. Those guys might be genetically different to you and therefore you're unable to become the same type of alpha as them... but that doesn't mean you can't be an alpha. Alphas are as diverse as the human gene pool.
You also have to remember that women want a natural alpha. The guy who "just gets it." She is not interested in the process a man goes through to become an alpha or the hard work he puts in. She wants the end product. Women can't see that it requires effort to become high SMV. This is because they don't need to put in effort to become high SMV. An HB8 or HB9 develops into that due to her genetics, as long as she doesn't overeat/not bother taking care of herself. The reason they want the man who effortlessly achieved great value... is because if the man did that effortlessly, it's because his position at the head of the pack was determined by his genetics. Hence great genetics. Hence she wants him for babymaking. So if you seem like you're not naturally at the head of the pack and you're faking your position there... there must be something wrong with your genetics. Bitch don't want faulty genetics. And that's all she wrote on it. They don't think about how a guy "eventually gets it" because they don't care. They want the guy who already "just gets it." So you need to become that natural.
Which brings me round to why leadership is so important for a man and how it fits in around here. As I said earlier, you are the one in the best position to know your strengths and weaknesses. Remember that alphas are as diverse as the gene pool. Similarly, the successful Red Pill men on here are also very diverse and each brings their own style of leadership to the table as demonstration. But the one thing they all have in common is that they're leading their own lives. They're standing up for their own analysis and their own opinions. They're not looking to others to do it for them. If you're respectful of the other men here, then they will be respectful to you, so you have nothing to fear in putting forward your own analysis/opinions and then standing by them. BUT remain humble as a new leader. As an inexperienced leader, you're likely to be worse at it than others, so be prepared to be proven wrong and accept the learning curve. That said, it's part of the process because you must become a leader.
This is because TRP is partly about teaching all men to become leaders. Leaders in their own lives, and leaders of women. Since most women are naturally submissive, they will look to you for leadership. You want a successful sexual strategy? You need to be able to lead them. You want to raise your SMV? We can give you the starting word: "LIFT!" But you've got to decide what programme you'll start and how you'll approach your diet. You're the one leading the project to improve your SMV. You're the one leading the project to become whatever it is you've chosen to be, whether that's a plate spinner, LTR man or MGTOW. Seek advice and knowledge, not decisions. You can still compare and contrast your approach with what others would do as a learning experience... but in the end, you need to be making your own calls sooner rather than later. Get on that learning curve ASAP!
Just because you aren't leading the TRP sub, does not mean you are to be a follower. Leaders can work effectively together. Seek out my old post titled "Roles, Respect and Responsibility acceptance as an alpha trait" for an explanation of how they do.
Alpha males are leaders, not followers. You don't need to be mod, manager or president to be a leader. There's living proof all over this sub.
Jester2552 8y ago
The master has failed more times than the apprentice has even attempted
Iam7777 8y ago
-Quote by Kanye kind of sums it up for me
"You see it's leaders and it's followers But I'd rather be a dick than a swallower"
vengefully_yours 8y ago
Failure isn't a death sentence in most instances, it used to be and can be such as in war, but it's not anymore. Failure is simply finding out what doesn't work whether it is right then, with that particular thing, or always. It's part of the learning process, you need to know what doesn't work just as much as needing to know what does. You won't waste as much time that way.
With girls what doesn't work with some will work with others, but some things don't work at all. Some things work with all of them, or so close to it as to be as such.
Used to be you had to figure it out on your own through trial and error, those who tried more often figured it out faster and perfected it. Those who were too timid to try never got anywhere. Now we have the internet and the information to get laid consistently is right at your fingertips, there's no excise for not going out and perfecting your game.
Don't be afraid to fail learn to enjoy it because you're discovering what doesn't work, for whatever reason. It might or might not work later, depending on what it is you're trying to do.
Iam7777 8y ago
The leader is within you. Once you got that impulse of the need to act, once you feel that shit you are reading is repeating itself, going in a circle; do you continue to read the same fundamental truth hoping for something new to come about? No. You act on that impulse and make an impact with your newly acquired knowledge. If you want to make shit happen for you, then you're going to have to apply yourself. There's no other way. Feed your impulse. Enjoy the grind.
[deleted] 8y ago
If you had to recommend just one source for 'game', for a beginner, what would it be?
[deleted]
MentORPHEUS Endorsed Contributor 8y ago
Glad to find leadership highlighted, it is indeed an important skill for an Alpha male to possess. There are many forms of leadership, and TRP often focuses upon the Machiavellian style, which is characterized by often ruthless self-benefit, and is indeed worth studying and adopting from. It's also important, and in much of life more practical, to build charismatic leadership skills. Consider the two:
A Strong leader makes people around him get things done.
A Great leader makes people around him want to get things done.
NightwingTRP 8y ago
Indeed. The Great leader who has people who want to get things done around him is particularly strong when he has a diverse collection of talented men who respect him and can lead in their own right. Inspirational stuff.
[deleted] 8y ago
True words.
the manager cracks the whip
the leader pulls the load first
Classic tell vs show. Always show.
[deleted] 8y ago
Agree strongly with that. Machiavelli is well worth reading, but there is much he didn't understand, and far better models out there. Working on a post on that very subject.
[deleted] 8y ago
A good leader rewards his followers lest they rebel.
Dustin_Bromain 8y ago
Excellent post. Gives me a lot to think about. Thanks to heavy introspection and self-analysis, I've discovered that I'm an LTR man. Too many blue pill feelings creep up with plates. But fuck it. Time to start leading my own life. Whatever that may be.
NightwingTRP 8y ago
You've gotta do what you've gotta do. I would recommend the 8 part LTR series by OccamsUsername as a solid starting point.
[deleted]
[deleted] 8y ago
Can you explain? I thought plate spinning would make you more outcome independent and thus not beta?
Dustin_Bromain 8y ago
It's not a falsehood in Red Pill theory. It's just an annoying factoid about my own personality. For some reason, I just get very attached to my plates. It's a problem that I'm trying to overcome.
Kathulos 8y ago
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us."
-Marianne Williamson
joshsoowong 8y ago
"If you do things only for other people, you are likely to fail. Do everything for yourself."
-/u/Iwastheproblem
[deleted]
PandaMania3 8y ago
This is post is addressing a very big issue to all man out there who keep on playing armchair activists.
You always let something/someone/some shit lead your life for you.
Male feminist, Thinking that pushing for more Female autonomy helps to give them a better life, but doesn't do things to make themselves better.
MRA, Fighting for more rights trying so as to have a better life. Yet not all are into improving themselves. They got stuck on the anger phrase and rage against the system.
Blue Pill Plugged ins. Wanting the recognition by society and mindlessly swallowing everything society gives them throat down.
White Knights, believing that Downplaying other man helps make them more attractive but doesn't do anything to physically or mentally better themselves. Working like dogs sniffing for pussies in peril to show up with their glorious White (Note : Cum stained) armor.
What MGTOW or TRP always advocate is to get a grip of your fucking life. Live the best out of You, not follow a fucking template of the "Perfect Male Specimen" and thinking that after clearing a sequence of checklist, Test you will graduate with all woman bending over asking you to fuck them.
Always remember Elysium is a Lie. You don't overcome a hurdle and expect the world to be free of obstacle for you in life.
deeman010 8y ago
Nice stuff... one of your points was bugging me for a while. Why is it that most people commenting on this sub (recently at least) think that failure = beta.
How do you choose to not fail at something?
NightwingTRP 8y ago
Because it is true most of the time. Behaving as a beta male will likely lead to social, romantic and sexual failure. Not always, extremely good looking men can act beta and still get laid. High status men can act beta and get laid. Total SMV is made up of a number of different factors and your behaviour is a big one... but that doesn't mean it can't be overcome if your status is high enough and you have enough money etc etc.
I don't believe it's possible to try to achieve something and then choose not to fail. All you can really do is just maximise your approach to things. Be pragmatic and use as many of the things which are within your control, then don't care if you fail because of things outside of your control. Remember: success is a lousy teacher. Failure gives you the chance to grow and address problems.
Even the most epic of alphas on here will get rejected by women sometimes. This doesn't make them beta. So failure does not equal beta. However, being beta means you're likely to be failing. It's a subtle difference, but yeah... as a result we tend to label negative actions leading to failure as simply "beta." Remember, it's the actions which we're labelling, not the failure itself. Keep an eye out for the idiots who label the failure as beta and not the actions.
deeman010 8y ago
Thanks for the explanation and I get it. I was more of wondering why people are thinking in that particular manner. I don't recall it (failure = beta) being one of lessons from trp.
I'd also like to contest one of your points where you said that betas are more likely to fail. I'd like to narrow this down to "betas are more likely to fail at getting women". There are tons of corporate drones out there getting paid thousands upon thousands of dollars for their work. I don't think that I can remove them from the definition of financial success.
NightwingTRP 8y ago
It's a fair caveat. It's why I said "more likely to fail" because women switch their strategy around the "epiphany phase" to lock down a beta for provision. Betas are not terrible at provision. I think there's plenty of beta managers and senior managers out there. However, from my experience of the corporate world... betas are rare at director and board level. They also don't last long in consultancy.
Ultimately the reason I didn't go with that originally and downplay/don't really talk about what betas contribute or achieve is because I don't want to encourage being beta in any way for any part of your life. It's just not a sensible move. I can only think of one circumstance where being beta could be considered Red Pill.
deeman010 8y ago
Fair enough... it's more marketable and it will probably lead to better results (ie more men willing to reform their beta traits). Understandable and I respect it.
[deleted] 8y ago
Disagree with that completely. Women who look good put more work than you understand into themselves.
NightwingTRP 8y ago
They groom themselves. That's it. They don't need to spend months on end lifting and pushing themselves. They don't need to spend months and years achieving things in their career or developing skills to raise their SMV.
Simplifying that back down... women are just attractive as time lets them develop through their genetics. Men are (typically) not. That is the difference I was talking about.
ColdEiric 8y ago
Make a list of shit stupid shit and a list of the mistakes the unattractive girls do, and I'll tell you what the attractive don't do. They keep from doing that, or the opposite or both.
[deleted] 8y ago
I understand downplaying women helps your inferiority complex, but you need to understand that really good looking women put work into themselves. If you can't see that I kinda feel bad for you.
Have a good evening, or morning wherever you are dude.
NightwingTRP 8y ago
Your passive aggressive side is showing. Don't do that. It's extremely feminine. That's the last piece of advice you'll get from me.
Dustin_Bromain 8y ago
Dude, you're white-knighting and attacking an endorsed contributor with classically female shaming tactics. That's bullshit.
draquish 8y ago
Her look might take three hours, but mine has taken three years
[deleted] 8y ago
Like what? This is an honest question - apart from nutrition and a bit of working out, I don't really know what women do to become HB9. Sure, they put on makeup and fake hair and fake tits and flashy clothes, but to me, that's not attractive - that's what whores wear, not high-quality, high-SMV women.