There are few things worse than being an orbiter. You are stuck in a position close enough to a girl so that she gets the validation and company she wants while stringing you along with the prospect of sex.

You keep investing in her, spending time with her, spending money on her, thinking about her, etc. But your dick stays in your pants. You’re stuck in friend-zone and the likelihood of feeling obsessed with this girl grows by the day.

The first time you go out with a girl, it is almost impossible to distinguish whether you’re an orbiter to her or a potential love interest. Many times in her mind she hasn’t decided yet. It is the next few dates (i.e. times you hang out with her, for lack of a better term) that will decide whether you become her lover or her beta orbiter.

The simple way to never become an orbiter is to ESCALATE. Always be physically moving on to the next step.

The problem is that women are crafty motherfuckers. They’ll avoid hanging out with you in a place where sex could happen—namely your place or hers. That gives her full reign when you escalate in public for her to say, “Not here!”

And then, when it’s time to go back to your place or hers somehow she’s feeling tired, sick, has to be up early or is on her period.

And then the next day she starts with the breadcrumbs. She texts you flirty, friendly messages as if she likes you. She’ll talk with you in different ways, meet up with you, confide in you and make you feel like you’re her boyfriend—except for the sex of course. Welcome to orbiterville.

So here’s what you do to ensure you never become an orbiter again. The next time she wants to hang out with you text her:

“Stop by my place with a bottle of wine.”

Or

“Come over to my place. We’re gonna watch a movie.”

The idea here is that you refuse to go out with her in public where sex can’t happen. The next date is at your place. If she’s in, then she’s in. If not, she will use every excuse she can to not go over your place.

And if she refuses to come over your place, then you have your answer. She’s not into you enough. She won’t fuck. Cut off contact with her.

It is possible she’ll come over to your place and not hook up with you, but if that happens the next step is still the same: Cut off contact with her.

This is the best way to ferret out her words from her actions. No matter how many times she says Yes with her mouth, if she says No with her body, that’s the real answer. Her actions reveal the truth.