Background: Guy who was introduced to RP ideology gets frequent IOIs from women but didn't have much success despite kino. He wonders what the hell went wrong and why that chick who was checking him out doesn't approach him.
Body:
I realized something very important that was crucial to my success with women, and I finally knew what was going wrong. I would never approach a girl, and I would normally wait for her to approach me. If I did, I would not show any signs of interest at all, assuming that alpha males don't validate women. While alpha males don't, indeed, validate women, they don't lay there like a cold rock and expect to drown in pussy. If you like a woman, you approach her and give her IOIs. You never wait for her to eyefuck you and approach you, because this is never happening. Women can't approach for shit and are highly insecure. The moment they realize they are interested while you aren't is the moment they will look for another alpha.
Conclusion:
Being an alpha doesn't mean being an introvert. Don't ever think that showing interest is a beta tendency or is weakness; girls would love to get inside a high quality man's pants if he lets them. Fellas, approach ladies. Show them your interest. Don't validate them but also don't reject them. Thinking that women will run after you because you treat them like ghosts will never get you pussy.
​
Extra reading:
"But SATHelpPlz, how am I supposed to not validate women but also show interest?" Well, you have some homework to do. Attraction and showing interest are built by strong eye contact, kino, and flirting, NOT by telling her you are so hot omgg how are you even talking to guys like me. If you are interested in reading how to build attraction, check the sidebar.
​
As always, I will see you in the weight room, nerds.
Your_Coke_Dealer 5y ago
A more concise how-to: to show interest without validating women, challenge them to impress you. And be attractive.
cupshadow 5y ago
I think this is a coping mechanism to avoid the anxiety that comes with approaching. Can't speak for everyone but I used to to think like this for a while. There's no limit to how many excuses a man will find to not approach.
krym33 5y ago
If you don't show interest you don't really want it, selective, but not showing interest at all times means you don't know what the fuck you are doing lol.
"You look nice, I can give you a chance, let's see what you got" Then you approach her, you don't have a mentality to validate yourself and have the best mentality out there "I am the prize".
BurntYams 5y ago
A very needed post imo. Nice simple reminder OP
beachbbqlover 5y ago
Alpha is not being an asshole. It's not being disinterested.
It's being engaged, intelligent, and actively pursuing your interests and aligning others to them overtly and softly. Being gently assertive when you can.
Decisively reassessing your situation when things dont work out your way. Taking that moment to determine where you stand again and then standing there.
I dont even use the term anymore. Reminds me too much of Rocko from Undergrads.
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redpillcad 5y ago
I think this post is on the right track but I have a couple thoughts to add
First, its not bad to validate a woman. Last week a new bitch was really sweet and fetched me and my friends drinks and laughed at my jokes and squealed with delight when I held her down and fucked her and painted her tits white. I gave her plenty of that sweet Male validation because she earned it.
Also I agree that women never approach or do anything that one of her SoyOrbiters would think is a come hither.
But...knowing what we know about women...they put themselves in the position to be taken by men they desire. Its subtle but after some bold successes you can sense that if she is making herself available then she likely is DTF if you have game
Its leg day...see you there
Rollo_Mayhem3 5y ago
you can do "back-handed" validation by using words like "kinda cute" "maybe if... you put your hair up" or "picked a better color..." you are still showing interest but its conditional or incomplete... or "some guys would find you attractive for sure..." the implication is you're completely NOT sold on her but you acknowledge some aspect that is pleasing...
I usually push... like yeah your ass is cute but its getting a little juicy (fat) or I bet those jeans help a lot...I need to see the real thing...(aka nude). you leave them in limbo.. they need to work harder
silent_dominant 5y ago
You give validation after the fact, not before.
Think operant conditioning
frooschnate 5y ago
What are we counting as approach here and where. At clubs or parties they have a lot less motivation to talk to you cause there’s so much sausage there she doesn’t have to. It’s different on more casual day to day settings
redpillcad 5y ago
You mean different situations require different tools? Hammers don't work when changing car battery?
FereallyRed 5y ago
I've got a hammer and I nail just about everything.
clavabot 5y ago
Nah i dont believe it, one size fits all works, i got ripped/laid/rich thanks to my bowflex /s
frooschnate 5y ago
Ever heard of duct tape
Are you saying girls never do anything significant approaching or to show intent? There’s something not clear to me about the orbiter comparison
RightHandWolf 5y ago
Duct Tape is like the Force . . .
It has a light side and a dark side, and it binds the Galaxy together.
redpillcad 5y ago
I 'm saying that in class if a girl like s a boy, she will somehow always be near the pencil sharpener when he is there. Drinking fountain too.
If you take out clients to lunch and follow up with an email to all and she responds and doesn't CC the rest. It's on
If she texts about something she could have googled or asked her bff that she talks to 44 times a day...It's a lock
She won't unbutton your fly....She won't ask you out........She just enters your orbit and thinks please ask me out...please have a clue and be one of the guys who just gets it
frooschnate 5y ago
Yeah, that’s nothing new under the sun. We can agree on that, I got a different meaning from your comment at first.
redpillcad 5y ago
Maybe not new but most men absolutely won't take the hint that women yearn to be swept off their feet and treated like fuckdolls (by the right man)
frooschnate 5y ago
Exactly, and let’s keep it like that.
FieldLine 5y ago
A woman sending an IOI your way is her way of approaching.
frooschnate 5y ago
The most basic one. Girls can come up to you and start the conversation themselves too, that’s why it depends on the setting.
FieldLine 5y ago
I would still classify that as an IOI.
Opening a friendly conversation is very low risk, and it's still on you to escalate so the interaction doesn't end with "it was nice to meet you, see you around". The word "approach" (in my mind) connotes creating a sexual undertone that both parties are aware of, even if not overtly acknowledged. Using the word in this sense, women almost never approach men, unless there is a large SMV disparity.
Starting a conversation with random people is totally normal, even more so as you get older. There is nothing strange about opening someone while standing around in public. It happens to me every time I go out, both with me initiating, and other people talking to me. 99% of the time we don't even swap names, or even more than a few sentences.
So when someone in asktrp asks "hey, what to I say to her to start a conversation" I can't really be helpful because that is just a normal part of being social. Asking "how do I make this ordinary social interaction into a sexual one" is a more meaningful question.
It's not even that I don't want to help those guys, it's that I don't know how to reach them. Over the last couple of years TRP's target audience has shifted from guys who are socially well adjusted but sexually unsuccessful to guys who are socially retarded.
/u/CainPrice, do you have anything to add? From reading your stuff I have a feeling we might be on the same page, here.
CainPrice 5y ago
I didn't have much to say about this OP in general because it's fairly simple-minded.
OP is right that some guys decide that to be the truest of true alphas who don't prioritize women, they have to just sit there and let women fall out of the sky on to their dicks over how big their muscles are and treat every single sentence they exchange with a woman with indifferent dismissiveness. But I don't think these guys are actually going out and doing this around women. They're just regurgitating the textbook alpha crap they read around here, taken to the extreme. Most likely, they go out, they're still too chicken-shit to approach women and risk rejection, so they sit in the corner making creepy-eyes at a few girls and wonder why their creepy indifference isn't getting the women to come over.
Women don't usually approach. Sometimes, but not usually. When they do approach, it's always just polite conversation so they have deniability. It's up to you to take that polite conversation and turn it into flirting in a way that is subtle and seamless and not the least bit awkward. But most of the time, women don't even do that. They just catch your eye across the bar, maybe smile if they're brave or look away if they're not, leaning over so you can see their cleavage while they pretend they're not looking at you, and wait for you to come over to them. If you don't, some other guy will.
darksidessj25 5y ago
They won't approach you at all. I've only had one girl approach me and say Hi. She was really pretty and I was like why the fuck are you approaching me? You pretty much have to do everything from Eye-contact to leading the interaction. Women do give you a chance to establish eye-contact in the beginning of a conversation if your bold enough to. I do this quite often and it's what gotten me attention from girls. I had them just stare in silence three times and bite their lips. Fuck the outcome and awesome the positive.
YoungBillionaire 5y ago
Speak for yourself girls have approached me
omega_dawg93 5y ago
this isn't true at all, dude.
women are VERY subtle, covert, and misleading with the ways they try to attract men.
they HATE rejection so they often play it very safe with how much interest they show. women NEVER want to come across as desperate, and in men, they find being desperate one of the worst qualities you can display.
they're giving signs... you're just not picking up on them.
Trenned_out 5y ago
And they want plausible deniability so it's easier for them to rationalize that they weren't rejected
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AAThrowaway5 5y ago
That poor young thing needs a DADDY
EPArt 5y ago
Adopt her man, as a guy in my mid 20's I approve.
odaklanan_insan 5y ago
I don't think age differences really matter for casual hook ups. All people are adults after 18.
If you get a good vibe from her, go for it. I'm in my mid 20s btw.
darksidessj25 5y ago
That's fucking awesome dude. Just reading that reinforces positivity. I use to military press 135lbs and bench 225lbs at a weight of 140lbs. I got injured though but I can still do 50lbs dumbbells. I did strength training. I got abs and shit but that didn't even work for me cause I didn't know how to flirt. You can completely kill it with your physique but if you don't know basic non-verbal communication such as eye-contact your better off being fat and over weight rofl. I didn't know anything about eye-contact. I had to learn this all on my own and at 30 years old. Most of my hook ups where from Tinder but the women on there are well you know lol.
nsfwalt900 5y ago
I would say being 140 isn’t killing it in the physique area.
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redpillcad 5y ago
When women act like nervous betas than she considers you AlphaFux
darksidessj25 5y ago
I flirted with Drs before and they where into it. Probably in their 40s. They where pretty good looking though. I had this girl who was married shoot me her Instagram when I first did it. I felt so bad. The next day I went back to see her we where still infatuated with one anther cause I had to pick up my prescription glasses. This chick was really pretty and probably around 35 or so. She started to role play with me about traveling somewhere lol. You get a lot of this if you're not careful.
Truedemocracy4 5y ago
Wrong boyo. Had 3 different women approach me last weekend alone while out. Now this is rare, but it does happen
darksidessj25 5y ago
Shit... awe wel at least women are into me lol. It’s better than being in attractive.
darksidessj25 5y ago
Wait do you guys go to bars and clubs? That’s a lil different
Truedemocracy4 5y ago
Ah yea this was bar st Patrick’s day so alcohol was flowing.
darksidessj25 5y ago
Ohh that’s still awesome though. I am mainly talking about day game and social circle game. I get 8-10 approach signals when I go out. It does mean what it means. I remember I approached a Japanese girl one time without knowing game at all. I took her out on three dates and she was inviting me to parties. I even got her in my room. I was so stupid back then and I didn’t know that she wanted to just bang. I also approached this girl at the gym before and we would go walk around sometimes. I didn’t know that they both wanted to fuck. My beta behaviors lol.
TheScarletScholar 5y ago
That may be true for you, but not everyone. I would say I get approached usually at least once every night I go out (most of the time they're not above an hb5). Also the reaction from girls will vary on an individual basis in regards to IOIs. There are many girls who I gave no IOIs too and made it ambiguous whether or not I liked them which caused them to chase harder. Occasionally when I was returning IOIs I would have girls subsequently flake.
On the other hand there are girls who showed no interest, then became interested after I gave IOIs. There is no one size fits all.
darksidessj25 5y ago
I do social circle game. I don't really do night game. I get roughly about 8-10 IOIs when I go out during the weekends. I strike up some conversations with the girls that show interest. The ones that I flirt with are usually right in front of me. I had a hair stylist grind up on me before while cutting my hair lol. She preened her hair as soon as I made eye-contact. I just escalated it from there. How do you show interest? For me it's just eye-contact and a slight smile while talking.
TheScarletScholar 5y ago
For some odd reason workers at fast food restaurants hit on me a lot giving numbers unsolicited etc so I feel ya on those working girls lol. I would say strong eye contact is a given, but simply kino as well as more of an effort to talk to them. Especially in group settings when I'm gaming a chick and not giving IOIs I'll sorta half-ignore her or prioritize my attention so that she is near the bottom of radar. Lots of negging when I do interact too. I find this works better and more often on bitchy type girls. I for some fucked up reason find rbf to be hot af so I often interact with these types of girls.
Edit: I also don't like social game too much if I can help it. Helps preserve anonymity and likelihood or length of time they'll push for a ltr.
vandaalen 5y ago
Rocking that Ronald McDonald look, eh?
TheScarletScholar 5y ago
Bitches love clowns
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darksidessj25 5y ago
Shit I blew it with so many of them lol. I get a lot of 7s and 8s that flirt. A nice ass and a pretty face goes a long way for me lol. I can't fucking help it when I see a girl with these features. I had this chick at this restaurant submit right in front of my face and I didn't do shit and she was a 9. I'm kind of shy in the beginning but I kill it with my non-verbals. How do you get their number without putting pressure on them? I don't want them to get called out or nothing by their manager. I'm also with people the majority of the time witch makes it even more difficult. I do kino to a bit like touch her hand while she's passing me something which is pretty much all you can do.
TheScarletScholar 5y ago
Don't think of it as "blowing it." Dont experience every interaction hoping to get laid or a # (outcome independence). This will help you perform much more confidently in your game because you truly dont care how it turns out. Its an experience you learn from. There's a common phrase thrown around that 'rejection is better than regret' because when you don't interact you don't know if you had a shot or not and it's this lack of knowing that drives humans crazy. I've found in my experience most of the time when you do something ballsy like asking a girl out in front of a group of people you'll rarely get called out. It shows you're either bold or unaware of societal courtesies. This can help or hurt you though. It shows the girl that you dgaf but it also puts her in the spotlight of the public which can trigger her ASD and she'll turn you down out of nervousness/anxiety/not wanting to look easy.
I would say to up your likelihood is to catch her on your way to the bathroom or be the last one to leave, this way it is a more isolated convo. Ask for a # and what time she gets off or something like that.
If you have trouble initiating due to being shy I recommend reading "The subtle art of not giving a fuck." I don't know your religious beliefs but I'm a big proponent of absurdism. There's only one life you get so don't let unwarranted fears prevent you from doing what you should or want to. This certainly is easy to forget though.
darksidessj25 5y ago
Yea, I had ASD from a girl at work cause I approached her while she was with another guy which was my lead. They won't really talk to you in front of someone that likes them. She gave me direct eye-contact in silence for two to three seconds for know reason. I said good morning to her today alone and her reaction was really positive. I can approach a girl but she has to be right there and not across the room or busy talking to someone while looking at me. She completely ignored him when I was walking toward her and then went back to talking to him. I had to talk to him anyway so that's why I was heading over there and not to talk to her.
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Rimefang 5y ago
I had this with a coworker for about a year. Rarely spoke to her, but I got her hooked. She started crying to her friends that I didn't give her any affection after V-Day. I got rules to follow. Work protocol. It really got me down, and she saw that look on my face. However, I always look like this, either that or really mad.
Now things are awkward. I think she tries to make me jealous, actively avoids me, and just doesn't care, although she sometimes still glances at me. It's frustrating, but I always ignore it. I want to salvage, but the rational side of me is telling me that is stupid. It wouldn't work. I made a decision I would not get involved, and that's what I am sticking to.
Well, I plan on leaving that job soon anyways. If anything, I might say something on my last day. Maybe not. I haven't decided.
darksidessj25 5y ago
If your in a management position you shouldn't flirt with anyone. I find it to risky to risk a full time position for a girl. It would be best to put in your two weeks and then ask her out if your really interested. Multiple people date at my work so it's allowed. I flirted with the HR and she's interested in me. It was by accident lol and I didn't really mean to. We talk from time to time and it's not awkward. I make things relaxed and chill.
Rimefang 5y ago
Not management, but I tried asking another coworker out once. She reported me and I got reprimanded for sexual misconduct despite the fact that I kept my distance and only asked her out. I did learn however much later that she was a tad unhinged. She broke her wrist the day after I asked her out, was unusually aggressive(like she was always agitated) in her mannerisms, and I always found that odd, but dismissed it like an idiot. Now I always watch for shit tests.
Honestly, because of her, I am more cautious. I don't want to say I hold back, but that really turned me off for a few good months to everyone. But you're right. I do not want to risk a full time position for anyone. That's why I never pursued this other girl in the first place, even though this other girl has had eyes for me since day one. Still, things are just awkward between me and her now, and I just don't want to feel shitty, even though I know I did nothing wrong.
I think I'll go to the gym in a bit. Clear my head.
darksidessj25 5y ago
The girl that you asked out probably didn't like you to begin with. I stay away from people that don't give me eye-contact or show no signs of attraction. This is how you get those reports. Did you come off really strong? Like straight up ask her out without talking? This will get you sexual harassment and you'll be labeled as a creep.
Rimefang 5y ago
She probably didn't like me at the time looking back at it, but she made advancements towards me in the past. Strong advancements like chasing me down to talk and putting her hand on my chest. When they got a statement from her, she said she was sorry for leading me on. But yes, I was direct. I fucked up too. I'm not even gonna lie.
I don't think I was labelled as a creep, however. Basically, everyone involved felt sorry for me because it shouldn't have ended this badly, but it's done.
darksidessj25 5y ago
Yea those are strong advancements. Then why did they even say shit if she apologized. Was this girl even worth it? What she look like? I only for them if there really hot like a 7 or an 8.
Rimefang 5y ago
Those are the rules at my job, which was bullshit. I asked a HR rep beforehand, but I guess that's just for higher ups.
Also, understand that I talked to her on my blue days. She looked young and hot for someone in her 40's. I learned much later that she was divorced twice. Double red flag.
CanuckinFL 5y ago
Boys. Don’t care if dating at work is allowed. Don’t do it. Wisdom: (again) do not shit where you eat. And you look weak, not appropriate to your mission.
Or am i just old school and stuck in my ways?
Rimefang 5y ago
My boss told me the exact same thing.
RightHandWolf 5y ago
Do Not Fuck Around With Co-Workers. Period. Full stop. Even if things start out good or even spectacular, they won't stay that way. Women talk. They like to give men shit about "locker room" talk, but women's locker room talk would probably make a gynecologist blush. I drove a cab for 12 years on the weekends. Girl's Night Out. Bachelorette Parties. Service Industry workers planning their bar hopping around which studmuffin bartender is working which place. They talk, and they share Intel, and they love to trade the latest gossip about who's shagging who. They go into all kinds of detail and totally forget that they are in a cab instead of at a slumber party.
If you ignore the advice, and shit goes south, (Spoiler Alert: It will) it will be your word against hers, except that all 29 of her work BFFs and orbiters will help spread her version of events. In the days of "pound me too" you would have to be mentally defective to go this route. So Say We All.
Rimefang 5y ago
Like I said about coworker who's had it for me since day 1: she cried to all her friends when I didn't do anything for her. I sometimes get odd looks from her friends, but it doesn't concern me in the slightest. I always keep to myself.
Papiless 5y ago
This is how I got MeToo'd. I did not even do anything with the girl, she just had crazy high interest and I did NOT do anything to validate her. If I would have banged her I probably would have not been reported to HR. You really can't win.
BoskOfPortKar 5y ago
Nothing complicated.
Either they look at you, come close to you, initiate the conversation, speak to you from 20 cms face to face, or... if not,
Just eyefuck them : if they blush... done !
99% of men are afraid of women...
Before I concluded with my wife (at 20 yo) , I saw dozens and dozens of (many good-looking) men approaching her like simps for 18 months and being rejected badly...
At the end of the last year I eyefucked her in class (but did not expect any success). She blushed like hell.
5 minutes alone in the evening : closed in 30 sec.
So much complicated ....
P.S. : I was fucking 2 8/9 chicks at that time we "met". Bad boy reputation. She "hated" me for 18 months. Don't be nice guys.
At my old age (45), there are still chicks in their thirties/forties/fifties (the worst) and even 20s who will just be even more "direct" like it is text book "sexual harassment".
And I am not Chad. Around 7 now (still in shape/BB).
One_time_back_when 5y ago
Women will directly approach, it's just not common and not efficent use of time. More commonly, however, a woman will indirectly approach you just by placing herself in your immediate vicinity to make it easier for you to approach. You need to recognize when this happens
nross368 5y ago
Yes women will approach with no shame.
RPSilverfox 5y ago
This is so true. If you’re at a bar hanging out and a girl comes and stands within a few feet of you this is an IOI and invitation to approach. It’s happened to me numerous times and it becomes easy to recognize when it happens. And if a girl talks to you, even to ask the time, you are being approached. They are just more indirect about it.
redaftrp 5y ago
If they ask the time its always "Fuck o'clock".
TheScarletScholar 5y ago
Typically the more direct of an approach, either the more promiscuous or less attractive a girl is. One funny indirect approach I received occurred when I was at a bar and made 1-2sec eyecontact with a girl across the bar. A few minutes later I was texting and noticed in my peripherals there was someone facing me and they stood in that same position for a good 5 seconds about an arms length away from me. I looked up and it was the same cute hb8. We stared each other down and I didn't say anything because I assumed she came over for a reason and would say what it was. She just stood there awkwardly.
After a good 5 more seconds I said "hey what's up?" And she just acted like I had initiated the interaction. Easiest lay of my life. Not a frequent occurrence, but I'm not complainin.
KeffirLime 5y ago
Women are very risk averse by nature, if they don't have to approach they won't.
Why put themselves through the emotional instability of a possible rejection when they have a buffet of men to choose from simply by virtue of being present.
The only exception is if the male is significantly higher in value and the possible reward is worth the risk.
CanuckinFL 5y ago
This may seem banal, but I tell women I know well that I like me enough for 6 of them. Now the real average for us is 1/10 will maybe say yes to us. I’m smarter so I’d say I choose or read IOI’s better (I loathe rejection). So that’s 6-9 rejections I walk through before I talk/fuck happily.
For those supposedly confident dominant chicks, I want a comparable statistic.
True confidence comes when no one, but no one, in the room likes you, and you are just fine.
That’s internalized frame. And it beats cocky cuz it’s legit and it’s earned. And I still miss or falter some IOI’s, when I’m tired, and not top tier aware.
And yes, women are chumps for developing or maintaining rapport. I have a few ‘trained’ and I Still have to scold them from time to time for being socially awkward dipshits. What you gonna do.
ChrimsonChin988 5y ago
If no one in room doesn't like you and you don't give a fuck that doesn't make you confident. That probably makes you a sperg because if nobody likes you there's probably a good reason and you should actually give a fuck.
Confidence is when most people in a room do actually like you and you don't give a fuck because you don't need validation. Don't hustle backwards nigga.
CanuckinFL 5y ago
Oh look it’s someone replying and -aggressively at that. You must know what you’re talking about then. Good. ‘Don’t hustle backwards nigga’ however, makes no sense in this context. And as to the veracity of my comments I’ll go with Rudyard Kipling, not you, friend.
Yep, I’m referencing the poem ‘If’. Look it up it’s pretty inspiring. And the next time you ride shotgun to my comments, add something of value or stay your keyboard hand huh? Attaboy
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INNASKILLZ2K18 5y ago
Yeah, this is a problem I've seen with other guys. It's kind of autistic. I mean, imagine it - you're standing there, and in your head your all 'hell yeah, I'm totally not showing any interest, and not even acknowledging her, fuck she'll want me 'cuz I'm so alpha'.
In reality, you are just some guy standing in the distance, who if she has noticed is either not thinking about you, or thinks you're too afraid to approach. How the fuck is someone supposed to think something about you, if you don't actually present yourself to them?
If this logic worked, she would think every guy who passed her on the street without acknowledging her, must be an Alpha.
It would be fantastic if we could go to a bar, stand in the corner, and have every woman come up to us because of how we 'don't engage with, talk to, or acknowledge anyone'.
I also see a lot of guys who think approaching equals validation. This is why we qualify, come from a place of high value. Make them jump through a few hoops, teasing, etc.
Basically, get your back up off the wall...go approach...and remember YOU are the prize.
darksidessj25 5y ago
How do they approach you? I’ve had them walk by me and smile.
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Hviterev 5y ago
Attraction, validation and commitment are different things.
You show attraction, you reward with validation and you don't give commitment.
Lambdal7 5y ago
Being an alpha isn’t what you think it means. It’s not being the boss and loud and dominant. These are fake alphas.
The real alpha is the one who nobody sees actually doing much except just chatting, but people just gravitate towards him. The key is subtle man-to-woman vibe while offering value, wit and a bit playfulness. With men, it’s very similar just that the vibe is more around having/offering value.
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That_Deaf_Guy 5y ago
Funny timing on this post; a girl initiated conversation, outright told me I'm attractive and asked me out for a drink, giving me her number. She's coming over tomorrow.
I don't even think I'm objectively attractive to be honest... it's rare, but it happens.
frooschnate 5y ago
Only situation where you’ll really need this is if you wanna take your pick at modelling. And it ain’t even objective cause some of those mfs are ugly
That_Deaf_Guy 5y ago
That is a fair point, cheers. I do get the occasional compliment on my looks so maybe I'm not doing so bad.
ThrowFader 5y ago
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tyronethejabrone 5y ago
I generally go for this but I can’t see someone getting results if they don’t have good looks or charm. /Slight humble brag
ThrowFader 5y ago
deleted ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.4806 ^^^What ^^^is ^^^this?
Hombremaniac 5y ago
That helps with everything.
ThrowFader 5y ago
deleted ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.2720 ^^^What ^^^is ^^^this?
wanker7171 5y ago
A good tip I picked up back in the day is that it’s great to compliment and validate a girl, when she’s earned it
bradyo2 5y ago
Completely agree. I wish this was hammered home more on this sub. It would have saved me a bunch of time and confusion a few years back...
Luckyluke23 5y ago
Attraction comes FIRST then comes showing interest. if it happens when shes not attracted it doesn't work.
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sebastianconcept 5y ago
For me is more important to send them confusing signals than to let them on zero validation. But when/if provide them of any validation, it has to be in “homeopathy doses” (very rare and infrequent)
Nighthawkdragon8 5y ago
Not showing interest is alpha, but still won't work in game.
odaklanan_insan 5y ago
Not showing interest is alpha, only when you're genuinely not interested.
Being alpha is more like, not having second thoughts about getting what you want.
ThrowFader 5y ago
deleted ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.5945 ^^^What ^^^is ^^^this?
Nighthawkdragon8 5y ago
Good point. If you do give a fuck and try to mask giving a fuck by not showing interest, then that is very beta
[deleted]
tyronethejabrone 5y ago
No. It’s “alpha” to go after what you want
To ravish a girl really would be alpha. But it’s not 10,000 BC and everything is a balance
Stop mixing up stoicism with a lack of proactive desire and intent
Nighthawkdragon8 5y ago
I see where youre coming from, and that sounds good in theory, but in the field to "go after what you want" will never work as well as coming from a screening frame.
tyronethejabrone 5y ago
Yeah man I gotta say it was pretty easy for me to type that one out.
Look, “alphaness” is a spectrum and being in complete control of one’s environment is alpha. People have definitely benefitted from not showing interest but it is a passive tactic that makes you much more reliant on others to make the outcome that you want happen.
Nighthawkdragon8 5y ago
Good point. I also find that showing disinterest used to help me more when I was truly just starting out, cuz it could make them chase validation hard, but as Ive progressed not showing interest just stifles me and gets me in my head.