Greetings my young Specties, this is you're Uncle GLO with my State of the Manosphere after 30 years of TRP. From humble beginnings way back in '12, weve grown to over 68 million GoogImPlant subscribers! But just because President Redpillschool got reelected in that crazy landslide and even his awesome sons have unpresidented approval ratings in their positions, we can't let ourselves get fat and weak and complacint. Set you're self apart from the SoylentBoys and there high estrogen, skinnycoulottes wimpy lifestyle; otherwise Uncle Gaylubeoil will roll over you like an invading army, for you're own good. Slowly the Overton Window is shifting our direction to the left, and Red Pill Ideas will continue to become even more mainstream. Having Red Pill characters in every TV show book and movie, chad PUAs making their moves openly in public and, grade school kids as young as 8 being allowed testosterone if they identify as masculine aren't anywhere near enough, we have to keep pushing the cock of our agenda down the cucked cultures throat like their all a bunch of Crimeans.
The fat, aposematic breed of femenist may have died out a generation ago, but beware of certain words creeping into the dialectic and old fashioned hardcore femenist styles coming back. Modern women insist that they like their short hair as fit for the modern era, and that long hair always falls in the baby's face. Some of us remember when mainly a special breed we called "femenazis" back in the day wore that as their badge of honor. No matter how faithful they are to their Captain and family and all the other trappings of femeninity, I'm still suspicious of they're ulterior motives whenever I look out over a sea of these modern young women with their fashionably short hair. Hair or not, all of my wives have done a good job of cranking them out, especially the newest most exotic one who produced my Chaddiest sons. Turns out Hybrid Vigger is a positive thing after all, as good old Arnold Schwarzenegger first showed me. 25 years ago if you told me one of my spiciest wives today might be both Black and Jewish, my head would of exploded instead of my nut. Even my gym buddy Kamal think's its hilarious.
On this month's extreme philosophy reading list, perfect for those of us whove gotten bored with mundane traditional "Trains run on time (to the ovens of course)" fascism. I present two works by Petr Aven, who since spinning Alfa Bank off into RussiAmerican Express International, has been on fire with his newfound devotion to writeing the most hardcore misogynist and fascist philosophies I've read yet. His latest two books, трахнуть ее в глаза (Fuck Her in the Eye) and ослепить суку (Blind the Bitch) actually spontaniously got me hard, which is pretty impressive when you get to be Chad Senior like me. You young cucks today lack the intelligence necessary to appreciate the finer points of Real Fascism, no matter how unpopular it becomes. I'm tired of you fucks throwing you're rebuttals in my face with what happened to my old country Russia and it's masculine but shortsightidly corrupt oligarchs. I keep telling you: That wasn't true Fascism!
Speaking of unpopular today, I insist The GloboHomo Conspiracy is alive and well no matter how casual and mundane the current fucked generation considers what they call "Their gay bros." Ive been around long enough to remember when they were having parades in the streets and recruiting vulnerable young men as "rapid onset gender dysphoria" cases (I swear I'm not making that up). Sometimes my wives' hair triggers memorys of the bad old days of short haired femenist dykes, but they keep cranking out the babies and the Bloodwork Bot keeps vetting them as mine, so I just roll with amused mastery like the top dog Alpha I am.
Don't fall for the denialist agenda that The Bentonville School has been trying to force down our throats. Those homegrown American Thorium Oligarchs, the Walton-Trump Brothers, have totally infiltrated our colleges which as we all know are loaded with classic cuckservatives. Just because the hoopla surrounding faggotry died down 20 years ago in pop culture, don't think your safe from the Globohomo Conspiracy which will surely rise up again at any time. That was around the time the more cucked parts of The Manosphere stopped treating them as enemies too, but somebody has to carry this torch. Please take The GloboHomo Conspiracy Theory seriously!
Its 2042 and your STILL using crude testosterone manipulators instead of the real thing? I see chucklefucks bragging about that stuff every day in askTRP on the old Roogle platform. Doctors have been warning us for the last half century not to fuck with our endocrine systems carelessly. Among other long term effects you might regret, the affects of hair loss on you're SMV is a real bitch. Might as well get used to fucking only chunklers and single moms now if your gonna go that route when your young. Listen to you're old Uncle GLO and stick with genuine test and relyable name brand bloodwork bots. Some people can rock the bald man look but, I don't care how alpha you don't want to be walking into bars and clubs looking like a dick with abs (NSFW) if you can avoid that.
I can't believe I once dismissed my now favorite passtime as degenerate. In Memory of my dear old fellow Russian friend Grandpa Vasiliy, who finally got it through my thick head that bondage is actually really fucking fun, I present to you my updated Of Human Bondage: Uncle GLO's guide for men who like to tie up young ladies. Its great and my wives let me do it all to them. Except for the hair pulling, but I had a plate for a while who had long hair that was good for pulling, such a rare treat these days. A little B here and D there fits in neatly with my LARPy fascist aspirations too so win.
Red Pill theories really have been a boon to my career as well I highly recommend you young Specties follow them. I finally Alpha'd my way to a decent promotion at RiStoneCorp, which is going to buy a lot more masculinity to surround myself with, from upgraded home gym equipment to keeping my orgy size shower well stocked with consumables. Always be closing! Last week the boss took us top producers out on his yacht (that happens to be a retired navy vessel that he completely rebuilt from stem to stern in his personal drydock facility) which is going to bring you premium members of my channel the most masculine deep sea fishing video ever released in the long history of the Manosphere. Also make sure to check out my Uncle GayLubeOyl's CorporateLand series including the latest installment Nepotism: secret weapon against getting automated the fuck out of my job.
If you want to download one of my new for 2042 line of T-shirts or masculine cars or any other commodity I offer, my Googazon ID is GLOstheBESTEST. While your there, download my latest GeeBook, Ride the Bobcat by Orange Julius GayLubeOyla, and my classic GayLubeOyl's guide to managing your bitches.
As head mod, founder and, highest upvoted poster on Roogle/MarriedRedPill, I also offer the Manosphere's best life coaching and personal consultations to help you unfuck your marriage via GoogleVoiSkype.
DeGENZerate 5y ago
This post is okay OP but if you really wanna step up your April Fools writing game you should talk with u/GayLubeOil about his coaching service he is the king of satire around here. Just food for thought.
GayLubeOyl 5y ago
Ive been a student of his for years, he taught me every conjugation and contraction error and malapropism I know.
AWorseManThanYou 5y ago
I have no idea why people are salty. It was amusing and I enjoyed it.
Joshua_Pectorals 5y ago
I'll wait for the 2070 line of state enforced GLO t shirts tbh
MentORPHEUS Endorsed Contributor 5y ago
Well shoot, I was going to make a "How to be a strong ethnonationalist shitlord alpha and still love cats" post to troll u/gaylubeoil for April Fools.
Now it's like, I got nothin'...
PerplexingPegasus_ 5y ago
Would love to see a /u/GayLubeOil & /u/GayLubeOyl podcast talking about hypergamy and why all men are victims. Think it’s possible OP?
GayLubeOyl 5y ago
IDK young me is acting all quiet about this. Also 2019 RedPillSchool and I agreed to ban this account after today to prevent future trolling now that his IT guru son figured out why we're crossposting to that year and this portal will be closing. TRP.RED has grown into an amazingly robust platform is all I can reveal.
AutoModerator 5y ago
Why are we quarantined? The admin don't want you to know.
Register on our backup site: https://www.trp.red and reserve your reddit name today.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
GrandYam_HomeRun 5y ago
Big Ups for using aposematic correctly. This should be in everyone's' vocabulary.
Beware the Siren Song of the brightly colored.
Imperator_Red 5y ago
Dude your writing is legitimately unreadable. I just can't make it past the first paragraph.
odaklanan_insan 5y ago
I didn't know you could read at all buddy. Keep up with it.
[deleted]
GayLubeOyl 5y ago
Bro Ive been coaching young specties like you're self for 30 years now and am the most upvoted poster and commenter on MarriedRedPill. You should sign up for my coaching service via GoogleVoiSkype.
max_peenor 5y ago
Ok, hit my limit. I can't keep a straight face after that one.
[deleted]
FuzzyBeanDip 5y ago
Sperg is the preferred nomenclature
GayLubeOyl 5y ago
That term faded from use back in the early '20s when they consolidated everything back onto the Tard Spectrum. Glad you reminded me, now I have something for Throwback Thursday.
Vikingcel 5y ago
If you uphold the 1st of April as an international day of jokes, you're a conforming faggot and should turn in your radical card.
RStonePT 5y ago
Cyberpunk is best punk ????????????
Funny how that works, it's impossible to be non conformist without conforming. It's almost as if conformism is based on some innate part of us, and not manipulations from dr Strangelove.
No matter where you go, there you are.
Though I'm reminded of rebel vs revolutionary archetypes. The beauty of this is in that the rebel using tradition (or the nostalgia of) to resist conformity, when it is tradition that the typical rebel is rebelling against.
Then again in this story I'm the revolutionary that was tempered by the contemporary in a world that gives everyone we would want, and yet simultaneously attempt to subvert it with the same rebellions that it used under FEMENISM, but now with a shiny red coat of paint.
GayLubeOyl 5y ago
A true Alpha grabs beta shitlib holidays by the pussy and make's them conform to his needs. Not, the other way around.
[deleted] 5y ago
[--removed--]
RightHandWolf 5y ago
I'm suddenly picturing Christian Bale in clear plastic rain gear for some reason.
Geleemann 5y ago
So mods are allowing shitposts now?
redpillschool Admin 5y ago
It's one day a year. Sometimes it's good to poke a little fun at yourself.
odaklanan_insan 5y ago
Apparently, OP's a mod himself.