For about 3 years, I have used online dating for the occasional hookup if I find the girl sexy and sane (rare) enough. It's a great supplement for dating women and breaking a dry spell. But, I won't sugarcoat anything for you - the most important part is being aesthetically attractive. If you aren't, it's a waste of time. Women can't hear your voice, see your body language, or do anything but read your words. A good picture and boatloads of wit is what gets you the face to face meeting. And, considering how idiotic most men are interacting online with women, this isn't difficult to do. I have been on more dates than I can remember (let's say 200 in 3 years) and live in one of the biggest cities in the world, so that's also a factor. Here are some tips and notes.

NOTE - Everything in quotation marks was lifted directly from a profile or a personal message.

  1. A lot of women think sarcasm is attractive - Feminism has taught women that it's oppressive to be warm, feminine, and inviting to an attractive man's advances. So, they are as combative as possible, because they believe men love a challenge. What I've found is that once you break through the initial bullshit filter (i.e. ignore the sarcasm), these women don't back up their big talk. They're insecure and use don't like it kiss my ass kind of talk to hide it. That said, these are the type of women who will cry when you're sarcastic back to them, so beware.

  2. Women with colored hair (i.e. blue/green/pink) always have issues - These neon nightmares are so clearly not insecure about their entire existence. They don't care what anyone thinks about them, that's why they take so long styling and coloring their hair and perfecting their appearance. It's part insecurity, part special snowflake syndrome. These women are the types that were bullied by pretty girls in school, so they turned to feminism. But, now that they're older, they've blossomed into beautiful women, but still have the poisonous victim ideology, so they spend their lives in cognitive dissonance. Mostly, I deal with whining about how some old lady in their coffee shop said something along the lines of you're so pretty, why are you doing that to your hair? Tip - grandma is onto something. I just nod along, because society is so oppressive to artistic women mmhmm. These women are always open minded and great for fucking. Any long term time spent with them will devolve into feminism and muh opreshunnn, so I don't advise more than a booty call here.

  3. Career women love fucking - Women that are so focused on their career tend to have more masculine traits and a higher libido. What they don't come with is an appreciation for romance, whining, or childish behavior. If you show any signs of being less mature, try to take them to a nice dinner (muh oppreshunn), or display any insecurity, you're out of the game with this one. These are the types who will rant about how every company doesn't have a female CEO or vice president, something she read on HuffPost, or blah blah'ing about the GOP and their anti-lady attitude (muh birth cuntrollll). These women tend to call you up on 9pm, go out for a drink, bring you back to their place (always) to fuck their brains out, and then ask you to leave. No cuddles, no love, just pure sport fucking. Don't expect to bust anywhere but inside the condom though; cum on their body is muh opressunnn. If that sounds like a good time and you don't mind being treated like a piece of meat, career women are right for you. If you're still in early blue-to-red mode, avoid this woman at all costs!

  4. The more tats/piercings, the harder the fucking - Amateurs beware! If you're inexperienced with women and think you should go after a heavily tat'd girl because they'd put out easier, you'd be right. But, what they aren't telling you is that if you're inexperienced sexually or not in touch with your masculine animal side, you will be laughed out of the bedroom. This will have a far more damaging effect on your psyche than a woman that's sexually inexperienced and doesn't know any better. These women require the rough stuff. Choking, slapping, forcing their head on your dick, spanking, and bruises from pounding them and tossing them around the room. It's great, but there are drawbacks. One, while all this stuff in the bedroom sounds awesome, these women are incredibly easy, so you won't ever be the only banging their skull into the headboard. Two, they always have severe daddy issues or an ex-religious upbringing, hence why they've turned their body into a circus attraction. Tip, if a girl wants you to choke her during anal, she's not the one you catch feelings on. Yet, time and time again, I see men fall for this exact type, and it's for one reason: The sex is amazing. This is exactly why "good girls" can't let go of alpha losers. Most guys treat them nice, show up to the Christmas dinner, and have awesome 3 minute missionary sex. An alpha will fuck her so well she'll have trouble walking the next day. Getting the picture yet?

  5. Average women treat you like a king - I won't bullshit you, by my history of success with women, I'm decently attractive. Thus, a woman who would call herself average would see me as above her in terms of SMV. These can be plain janes, curvier girls (which I love), or feminine women who take great care of themselves, but top off at cute, never hot. If I ever have a bad week, suffer a setback with a really hot girl, or am annoyed by the current women in my life, I always come back to these types. These are the women that put work into themselves and actually have hobbies/talents (cooking, embroidery, baking, etc.) They will show up to every family function you invite them to and act like a lady. They will have sex with you and wake you up with a sensual blowjob the next morning, then make you breakfast and sit on your lap kissing your neck. If you're sexually inexperienced, have not had much affection from women over your lifetime, these are your girls. Trust me, if you're new to the game, a "10" isn't worth the bullshit. Know the phrase "get your feet wet" before you become an expert? Same logic applies, except when I say feet I mean your dick.

I will tell you as someone who has fucked 10s (by my standards), these average women are worth the downgrade in looks for the pure femininity and lack of bitchiness. They don't constantly crave attention or have a phone blowing up 24/7. But Gatsby, you say, aren't there women that are hot and feminine. Yes, of course there are, but if you think you'll find them online dating, you're delusional.

This is getting too long for the post limit, so expect a PT. II in the future!

  • Gatsby