Here are some concrete tips you can use to inspire a healthy amount of dread in a relationship. I’ve been doing these and they’ve been working like a charm. You have to get these rolling from day #1:

(1) Don’t give her a straight answer when she asks “Is this serious?” or “Are you still seeing other girls?” Answer with a question: “Well, I’m spending pretty much all of my time with you, aren’t I?”

(2) Never friend her on Facebook, add her to your Instagram, or connect with her on any social media whatsoever, even deep into the LTR. Turn off read receipts on all of your messenger programs, and never use chat apps with her that say when you were last active. Never do voice calls or video chats with her. You’re untraceable when you’re not in her presence. Your life outside of her is your own, and it should be completely opaque to her. She’ll go crazy when you’re away. “What is he doing?! He hasn’t texted back for hours?! Is he with another girl?! I can’t track him at all!” She won’t be able stop thinking about when you’ll grace her with your presence again.

It’s crucial to never do voice calls or video chats with her, ever. If you voice chat with her when you’re free then it’ll mean something when you’re with another girl and you opt to text instead. She’ll know something is up, because you’re not answering the phone, and you’re texting instead. If you keep it strictly to texting 100% of the time then you deprive her of information. It’s not weird that you’re not picking up the phone, because you have literally never voice called with her, not even once. If she asks why then say you have phone anxiety, or something.

(3) Don’t cut her out of your in-person social life. Still invite her to social events with your friends. Since she’s excluded from your digital social life, getting a glimpse of your actual social life will be a blast for her. A night out bar hopping with your friends will be a huge treat. Be sure that your male friends are Alpha types who won’t be chatting her up beta style and trying to be BFF’s with her on Facebook. Your Alpha friends won’t invite her into your social media circles, because they won’t give a shit about her, just like they don’t give a shit about most women. Your beta friends might let her slip into your social media circles more easily, because they’ll think she’s oh so special and they’ll want to keep in touch with her. (Pro tip: try not to have too many beta friends).

(4) Always have somewhere to go so you can vanish if she disrespects you. Have a go-to bar. If you’re on a trip with her then have money in your pocket for a shitty hotel room so you can crash elsewhere. She’s allowed to express her preferences and debate with you about things, but she’s not allowed to be disrespectful, not even once. The moment she disrespects you say “OK, I think I’m going to leave now. Cya next time.” Then calmly walk out the door, head over to the bar, and crash elsewhere for the night. Don’t explain why you’re leaving, she’ll know. Don’t respond to the torrent of emotional text messages that will inevitably follow. At most wait a few hours and then respond “Chill your pants, I’ll see you next time.”

Remember that the trick to this is actually leaving for 24 hours. You’re not just threatening to leave in an attempt to coax an apology out of her, you’re actually walking out the door. Also remember that you’re not walking out the door in anger, you’re doing it calmly and for calculated effect. It’s a punishment. Your masculine presence is a reward for her. Getting to sleep in your arms is a reward for her. If she disrespects you, she loses your presence. You actually have to leave for this association to soak in for her. As a bonus, she’ll be going crazy wondering if you’re with another girl for the night, and she’ll be kicking herself for having driven you away. The next time you see her do not tell her anything specific about where you went. If you do this correctly that will be the one and only time she disrespects you.

(5) Talk to her openly about your plates, but in a playful way. She won’t be able to tell if you’re joking or not. Never bring it up yourself, but feel free to riff off of her about it when given the opportunity:

Her, after not seeing you for 48 hours: “So, when was the last time you had sex?” (Playful tone).

You: “Oh, you know, just last night.” (Sarcastic/flippant tone, even if it’s true).

Her: “Really?”

You: (make a silly face that doesn’t really mean anything).

Her: “Hey! No! Tell me! Did you really?!” (Worked up, but still happy).

You: “Who knows.”

(6) Protect your phone around her, even if you don’t actually have anything to hide (even more so if you do). For example, if you show her some random internet thing she’s going to want to take your phone from your hands to look at it. Don’t let her. If she ever gets a hold of your phone for some other inocuous reason then get it out of her hands ASAP. Make it so that your lock screen message alerts show no previews. When your friends are texting she’ll see that you’re getting messages, but not from who. She’ll wonder if it’s a side chick, especially because you’re so protective of your phone. If she asks you why you protect it say that you just like your privacy. If you do actually have a side chick then this should all be a given. At the very minimum you should occasionally be texting with some fresh prospects anyway.

(7) Talk down on people who have relationships (especially BP relationships) even if you’re very clearly in a relationship. Maybe your friend Ted vanished from your social circles recently because he found a new girlfriend. You’re hanging out with a buddy and your girl is there. Feel free to say “Fuck’n Ted, look at him being all Mr. Relationship now. Poof, he’s gone. Fuck that.” Later on she’ll shit test you by saying “Sometiems I wish you were more like Ted, and that you’d spent more time with me.” She actually doesn’t, and she’ll say that shit even if you’re with her full-time 6 out of 7 days of the week. As a bonus, when she says that you’ll know for certain that she sees Ted as a beta and doesn’t want to fuck him.

I’ve had girls tell me “You know, I’m 100% sure you’re cheating, but I have zero evidence. If you are cheating you’re really good at hiding it. I admire that.”

I’ll just grin, pause for a minute, and then say “thanks” in a confident but mildly sarcastic tone. She still won’t be able to tell if I’m joking or not.

Her: “Wait... are you really cheating?!”

Insanely hot sex will follow.

Remember that you can play these dread games even if you don’t actually have a side chick. If you do have a side then chick you’re hiding your side chick. If you don’t have a side chick then the act of pretending to be hiding a side chick shows your LTR that you’re high value and reserve the right to have a side chick.