This is a report in which I’ll preach as little as possible - I’m not too terribly deep into the red pill journey myself - but I will say the few things that I wish someone had said to me:
I got into an LTR with a girl I considered great - attractive, smart, and stable. She had just left a 3 year relationship with an abusive ex. Things were awesome for a few months. In fact, they were so awesome that when she started having sex less, I thought it was ok. I trusted her.
Every so often she’d talk to me about this girl or that girl, how they did this and that and she just couldn’t understand. I’d laugh along with her, ignoring the slutty pictures she was starting to post on insta and vsco. It wasn’t that I was bluepilled, I’m a more “naturally” red person than most, it’s just that because of her track record, I couldn’t even manage to think the worst. It was incomprehensible to my conscious brain - but my gut was uneasy.
We went on, things getting worse, little by little. You know, if you put a frog into boiling water, it’ll jump out immediately; but if you put a frog in room temperature water and heat it up, the frog will stay in until it dies. But here’s the thing: it was never bad. The relationship always seemed to be fine, people even looked up to us for never arguing, being supportive and all that. Only now do I realize it was all because I never argued, because I never needed support and gave it freely. I was the prize all along.
One day I told her she made me feel distant physically, and she just broke up with me. I was devastated. She rattled off a slew of things that “weren’t working” between us, all of which were trivial, things I would’ve been happy to work through because I loved her. I didn’t understand!
But now I do - it was just the hamster, rationalizing dumping me. She finally had something she could rationalize dumping me over.
I was devastated, and then I found out she had been cheating on me for months. I couldn’t believe it, I was the “perfect guy!” I listened, I paid for meals, I could give her several orgasms at a time. And now she was trying to fuck my friends and started smoking weed with the abusive ex I listened to her complain about so often!
She started to bully me when I tried to figure out where things went wrong, taunting me by implying she was sleeping with other men, not giving me my things back (she has my favorite book to this day). It was maddening.
The situation made me realize a few things:
- It doesn’t matter how good of a man you are, it doesn’t change who she is. Fidelity is about the individual, not the person they’re with. AWALT. AWALT. AWALT.
- The wife you honeymooned with is the same woman tearing you apart in divorce court with complete abandon for your self-esteem and anything you’d ever shared. You never truly know a woman until you see how she treats you when she wants you gone. Know that your precious little tulip would eat you alive if it benefited her.
- The things she says DO NOT MATTER. I know this because she truly believed, in her heart of hearts, that she was not a slut and better than those other girls. Everything a woman does is OK... in her own mind. Even cheating on a guy everyone calls “her prince charming.”
- Trust your gut. Jesus Christ, I wish someone had given me this important lesson, and I don’t think it’s talked about on here enough. If you think it’s a red flag, IT IS. Let me repeat that: IF YOU THINK IT’S A RED FLAG, IT IS. If I had trusted my gut I could’ve avoided so much pain. Your sixth sense is developed through millennia of evolution designed to avoid you getting cuckolded! Trust that shit! Trust it with your life!
This is mainly directed at people having trouble getting the pill down. That girl you love? She’s not your perfect little angel. She’s just a person, like anyone else, and she’ll rationalize her way onto someone else’s dick at the drop of a hat.
TL;DR she doesn’t love you as much as you love her. Trust your gut, listen to her actions, know that she can treat you terribly if she wants.
javiercer20 5y ago
Your gut it’s only an emergency exit. You can avoid situations like that just by doing simple things.
1 You have to be radical, never hesitate on doing what you really want to do.
Never love anyone more than you love YOURSELF.
You only have to let yourself go, take the jump.
prostaddict 5y ago
Broke up after 3 years and she immediately jumped into a relationship with you - you were her rebound. With rebound relationships, it's very common to lose feelings for your new partner after the honeymoon phase - she was just not emotionally available. That is a big red flag. Not to mention she seemed to have a broken morale compass with the cheating and sadism - sounds like her ex may have been abusive for a reason
phishyfingers 5y ago
No matter what you do or don't do, a woman will either cheat or not cheat. Nothing will change that, so why worry? If you get into the pig's pen, don't blame the beast when it covers you in muck...
punchyson 5y ago
First, I've been there and understand. The "Love of my life" had an abortion while I was on deployment. To this day I believe she met a "Chad" on a girls night out and you know, bitches, she got "confused". To this day that woman still tries to contact me to fix things, fuck her.
10 years in the military and getting fucked over by my bluepill conditioning has taught me an essential truth. If you want someone who will watch your back, be loyal when you are all fucked up, and a hand when you are down on your back... that is guy shit, make more solid male friends.
A woman will never ever do that for you. She literally has no fucking idea what she wants. She won't even be the same person on a daily basis. The best you can possibly hope for is a woman who through social conditioning, her circle of female friends and personal tastes is unlikely to have a biker/asshole ex that she still wants to fuck on the regular.
The red pill is giving me a very dark world view, but it is bringing my masculinity and my male friendships into sharp focus. Bitches ain't shit.
jonpe87 5y ago
""she can treat you terribly if she wants.""
I don't think so, only if you are attached, and that is when you are no more the master of your happiness and life. But the fault is yours. Like other dude said here, be a nomad in this world, enjoy, but not become attached for nothing and anyone.
GrapeCulture69 5y ago
There are only two reasons a woman would cheat on you. One, is that you weren't treating her right. The other, is that you were...
ahg1008 5y ago
or being treated good/bad got boring... or a new commercial said cheat... or a bitch next door said it's fun to cheat... HAMSTER goes on and on till that pussy dries up!
dr_warlock 5y ago
I remember my first oneitis told me at her bday party 1on1 that she was so grateful to have me because c) we never fight. Alarm bells went off in my head. It was the beginning of the end.
ahg1008 5y ago
yea the moment a girl tells you - she's with you because A,B,C.. It's a red flag.. You are being compared.. most women do it subconsciously but this one's doing it consciously. The end is near.
tokulord 5y ago
If you were really red, you would've figured it out months beforehand. You're just stupid.
ouroborus_ 5y ago
Mastery is a process of development. Nobody is born a master. This is not an argument.
ihavenofeeling 5y ago
Every guy on earth will experience pretty much this exact story at some point in life. That’s why TRP exists. Cause we can all relate to this story like it was our own.
Dargalo04 5y ago
I was the girl in this situation minus some inappropriate talk about ex etc, not too proud of it but I will make sure awaltism won't affect me.
fichgoony 5y ago
with TRP we are aware and hopefully not make the same mistakes others have. But if it happens, it happens
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gerfen008 5y ago
I got to the part where OP reveals himself. Buying meals and making your partner cum. Hahaha. You lot here are fucking hilarious.
ahg1008 5y ago
Yea we were all blue pill. It's about being taught certain belief systems since your childhood and then suddenly realizing - everything you knew was crap.
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[deleted] 5y ago
Imagine being so intellectually free, you quote Bin Laden unironically.
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whatsthisgarg 5y ago
Mr. Hands?
If you haven't seen the video, watch it with the sound up. A friend of mine said the memory crept into his spank bank, and he hasn't been the same since.
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CapnPoot 5y ago
Truth. To me, the most incredible thing about the female species is their ability to rationalize. I know plenty of guys who can hamster, but the hamster hyperdrive that I’ve seen some girls go through just to convince themselves something... a guy would have to be institutionalized to be that delusional.
ouroborus_ 5y ago
My wife has not once apologized for anything in the six years that I've known her. Not. Once.
CapnPoot 5y ago
Lol thats a shame to hear. All the "hold frame" and "be a man" advice here is great, but IME it only works in the short term. In the long term, everyone is susceptible to being driven up the wall by a modern day girl.
Most of my boys never took shit from girls, but the ones who got married are learning the hard way that not only do they not have power, but instead their wives have all of it. They are one wrong frame away from getting cucked by daddy government
ouroborus_ 5y ago
Absolutely. No matter how well you lay down philosophy or a moral proof, in their minds their bad behavior is always justified, and I'll never concede to it.
ahg1008 5y ago
Maybe the whole bloody civilization wouldn't have existed if we guys spent time hamstering. Someone needs to teach these women about logic and rationality.
Jejmaze 5y ago
We talk a lot about trusting your rational mind over your emotions. Maybe we should also talk about trusting your intuition over your rational mind. Sometimes you know something unconsciously even though you couldn’t explain it to save your life. Acting on this can make you look stupid in the short term since you can’t explain yourself but it can save you some serious pain in the long run. Nurture your intuition and it will become your greatest ally. Neglect it and you won’t know what to do with what your gut says.
rosewoodguy 5y ago
Went trough the same path, wondering how did I go wrong? i use to buy her clothes and pay for dinner, always listened to her and never complaint, but I think that stuff like this need to happen in order for us to see the hard truth and embrace the red pill, you can tell a beta he is wrong for glorifying his girl everyday ( that was what my friends did) but he will never stop until he is truly hurt and starts looking for the answers himself.
red-pill-man 5y ago
A soon soon as a bitch mentions "abusive ex", she's dumped.
Don't let them play games.
confusedguy911911 5y ago
I’m in the predicament now ,been with a Medusa now for a year.Broke up three times , tons of red flags .Gorgeous , mother of two (different fathers) plus 3 abortions including mine.She has all single gf’s who love to party, dumps her kids on her mother constantly, Insane sex simply insane , history of victimization mostly BS I’m sure .Loves to make you believe your the “one” the lover she wants to build a life with until free concert/club tickets come her way then tada you are not a priority,her kids aren’t either.Concert starts at 3pm by 4 she’s blitzed , and soon the weed and more booze.30years Old has nothing to her name , no assets ,money, zero! Worst case is I was ultra alpha when I met her ,ended up falling in love with her (no clue why) , not trying to save her , but can’t break away but it’s coming.I hope it wasn’t the sex that’s kept me here this long but I fear it may be ,it’s not the mind games And boundaries violations . All in all to the OP point , I’ve had my sixth sense pounding me everyday for a year to bail out ,I’m Just too stupid to listen but it’s been there every single damn day screaming at me .
HurricaneHugues 5y ago
"I got into an LTR with a girl I considered great - attractive, smart, and stable. She had just left a 3 year relationship with an abusive ex. "
Youre in for a bad time
absolutelynp 5y ago
Thats not what he meant. I think of it that way: when a woman stays with in an abusive relationship , something is wrong with her and you can expect trouble for yourself
justgotalpha 5y ago
Thats exactly what i thought!! OP ignored the first and most important RED FLAG!!
jonpe87 5y ago
abusive= "stands for his shit and don't accept my infantile ego and needs. Asshole!"
volvostupidshit 5y ago
Haha. That's most likely the case.
lqash 5y ago
Yeah, you always end up the bad guy. The abusive ex.
[deleted] 5y ago
It's ridiculous the revisionist history bullshit women pull. Had an LTR early on in college that ended after about a year. I treated her great. We barely fought, good sex, yadda yadda. Our breakup wasn't bad or anything, we just both realized we weren't meant for each other then split up. No fighting at all.
Then suddenly 2 years later I hear from a mutual friend that she told her entire friend group I was "emotionally abusive" to her. I swear that's the go-to phrase for women.
Fragile_Allegiance 5y ago
Yes this happened to me also. Before being redpilled if someone told me they have an abusive ex I would think wow they are in for a treat being with someone as kind and considerate as me! Now that I see the light it's just a sigh and making a note that the odds have increased that there is significant crazy happening.
Fragile_Allegiance 5y ago
I'll give a funny example. The last ex knew that my volunteer work is extremely important to me, so she commented on their Facebook page's pictures of me about how terrible I was. Luckily these people have known me for over 20 years, so they just told me it was so sad she was having mental issues. I agreed at the time but now I wonder... mental issues or is this what it has come to - is this why people cry AWALT?
trp369 5y ago
Loooool this made me burst out laughing I had the exact same scenario. Emotionally abusive guys unite hahahah
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nevetskl 5y ago
this same exact situation happened to me years ago... interesting to see how common it actually is.
Blaze_Bless 5y ago
Super common, blows me away still to see how we've all had similar experiences, there's strength in this solidarity though
TheTrenTrannyTrain 5y ago
How do you differentiate between gut feelings and paranoia/jealousy?
Personally I'm still not sure whether it's my BP mateguarding tendency rearing its ugly head or not.
jonpe87 5y ago
You don't, they are 99% of the time the same thing. Everytime you feel something is wrong, something is wrong.
onyxwitchcraft 5y ago
I’m kinda confused. You direct this at ALL women. So what should men do? Never date women? Or be overly cautious? I’m not getting what the solution should be. If EVERY woman will tear you apart to benefit her then why are you bothering with women if it’s really that bad?
An_Actual_Politician 5y ago
Sidebar answers this. Basically you have to do relationships with women (AWALT) on your terms and your terms only.
onyxwitchcraft 5y ago
Ahh okay that makes sense. I’m a woman and I honestly like reading stuff like this lmao. Was just kinda confused. Thanks.
finnabustanuut 5y ago
I am also in a ltr right now. I dtqy faithful and try to have a conservative relationship (monogame) but if she cheats or leaves me its maybe very unpleasant but at least i could fuck new girls. If something bad happens see always the good things
[deleted] 5y ago
I was always ready to leave her if I thought something was wrong. Like I said, I’m more naturally red than most. Remember, if your gut is telling you to dump her, just go. THAT was my mistake, I waited.
finnabustanuut 5y ago
Man i also have a gut feeling for the past weeks but i cant tell if she has done something. She was a virigin before me and we are in a ltr for more than 2 years. She doesnt drink, does not go to parties and stays the most time with me. She wants to move in with me but i have this weird feeling and i dont know if i am paranoid.
[deleted] 5y ago
Depends who you wanna trust:
Animal instinct developed through thousands of generations to protect you from cuckoldry
OracleofFl 5y ago
"She started to bully me when I tried to figure out where things went wrong"
WTF? You asked for closure? That is very blue pill thing to do. You are going to learn nothing from the exercise and you are going to confirm to her that you are a blue pill loser. If your thinking is that "you want to learn what you did wrong" you aren't going to find it there (what is she going to say? whatever she can think of to end the conversation, that's what.), you are going to find it on the sideboard of this subreddit.
"One day I told her she made me feel distant physically" are you fucking kidding me? You said this? You are negotiating attraction. Blue pillers talk about feelings.
This whole post belongs on asktrp.
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linkschode 5y ago
AWALT? Sorry dude, they’re not all like that.
That girl is a special kind of self obsessed sadistic evil.
Please don’t think AWALT. AWALT should be saved for the truly universal aspects of the feminine, not the pieces of shit.
If you think AWALT you’re going to be in a constant state of anxiety in all your future relationships, and this relationship will have damaged you forever.
jwarner95 5y ago
That's not true, AWALT in his sense is true because she isn't yours, it's just your turn. You need to be in abundance and have options available in case she decides to leave you. They're all like that, but maybe just not as bitchy about it. You can still enjoy a relationship knowing its future is uncertain, and that distant vibe you'll give off will be attractive to her anyway.
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johnpayne10 5y ago
Never give up. You are bound to fuck up every now and then. Learn from these mistakes and never repeat them. Stop overthinking and wasting your time on bullshit. Your time is the most valuable resource you have. Use it wisely. TRP is the best toolkit you have. Utilize it to the fullest.
warlords203 5y ago
i like how this doesnt demonize women but ocrrectly summarises women's (and any individuals) potential for deception and hamstering
ahg1008 5y ago
There is nothing to demonize. There is no way of knowing how people will act.. We are bloody complex.. It's just better to accept it rather than fight it.
account_rp 5y ago
Were you doing it with your hands and tongue or your cock? I think that women are only satisfied with hand and tongue orgasms from other women, from men they're only satisfied by cock.
finnabustanuut 5y ago
Whats with clitorial Stimulation during vaginal sex?
Camskies 5y ago
Thanks for this op it was really good
[deleted] 5y ago
So try. I learned something today.
VillagersUnite 5y ago
Even in the event that it's wrong, it's better safe than sorry. I can't tell you how many times my gut feeling went off about something and it turned out to be right. When you begin to doubt, something isn't right. Unless you have some sort of paranoia related disorder, pay attention to your gut.
JerryLawlerPigFace 5y ago
I needed this and I suspect many others did too as a simple and impactful reminder of things.
Continue to up your SMV like your life depended on it. You must create options for yourself to eliminate scarcity.
ahg1008 5y ago
And above all. Never let a relationship be a part of your identity. People will always leave for a billion reasons. The question is - are you self sufficient enough to not give a fuck? Think of life as an adventure -nothing more.. Sometimes you go on a vacation and it's good.. Sometimes you get horrible stomach virus. You feel happy / sad but you don't stop living - whatever living means to you. Never give much thought to anything you can't control. AWALT, friends dump you.. whatever.. We have this fucked up notion of defining our identity by the people we are with.. Let go.. This moment is all there is.. You can spend it the way you want to - be blue pill, be red pill, yellow pill.. Just remember the fact that when the moment is gone- you don't look back and you don't spend it away in a way that ruins the next moment. If you spend it in a way that improves the moments to come- better still.
Men will always be nomads in this world.
bossman9275 5y ago
Damn, i wish I learned this a while ago.
ahg1008 5y ago
Infact I'm glad you didn't come to this realization on your own. If you did..you'd have suffered - like I did for years and wasted time on people like I did. Be glad you didn't.. The more you understand life- how it actually works- the more you wish you didn't... All the magic is lost.. until you realize we're just animals with clothes and computers.
bossman9275 5y ago
I've had a lot of ups and downs over the past 2-3 years. I've had phases where i was really motivated and worked on myself, but ultimately it fades out after a couple months. I think the reason is I never changed my mindset or truly made an effort to learn and instill the new information that I need to progress and become the best version of myself.
I've just started browsing this sub and I'm ready to start changing things up, for good. Its insanely frustrating knowing that there's a much better version of yourself just waiting to be unlocked, but its like you're looking at that version through and invisible wall. I've read some of the expierences people have had especially with women and I'm sitting here like, "okay I'm a good looking dude, I have no problems attracting hot/high value women, what the fuck have i been doing these past 8 years of my adult life?"
Truth is I know what I've been doing. Too many bad habits, and thinking things will work themselves out or happen on their own.Its time to swallow the pill.
ahg1008 5y ago
Maybe every time theres an apparent loss in motivation remind yourself of all the bad things that happen later.
If you don't change the way you do things you'll always get the same results. That's how girls are these days . Are you a lil bitch high on hormones? or are you a man - out to conquer and bend the world over and fuck it ?
Decide.. either you fuck the world in its sweet pussy or you're the one getting bent and fucked over.
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jonpe87 5y ago
"Men will always be nomads in this world." This is a good frame! Wise words.
ladams7 5y ago
The present is truly a present. Thank you for your wise words I needed this.
Aculguy 5y ago
I've never seen a comment which deserves gold more.
bongohai 5y ago
Your last sentence made me jump. Thank you.
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[deleted] 5y ago
Always trust your gut, i learned this the hard way, if something seems off then it is...
[deleted] 5y ago
Millions of years of evolution at work. When something feels off, humans are usually pretty good at picking up on it.
Redditguy14Redditguy 5y ago
Trust in the truth
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7aZGjjGDu8
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ahg1008 5y ago
Yea. Never question your inner compass. Everytime you deny your gut, you lose self-esteem , you die a little, you become a bigger coward than you were before. At the end of it all- no pussy, money or power is worth loosing your self esteem.
fade2clear 5y ago
Just don't trust your gut on how to spell "lose" lol
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[deleted] 5y ago
Not only your self esteem, you'll loose yourself...
Low_Cost_Chimp_Meat 5y ago
This is how I view it with the New Red Pill 2.0 lense on here now:
So....let's read the truth here bro....you were most likely abusing and cheating on her. Because women will NEVER cheat on or leave good masculine man with solid frame unless extremely, extremely provoked. It is just not in the female programming.
Look within yourself for the blame and lift...and neg.
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