My LTR has been complaining she is not getting enough emotional connection from me. I talk with her and fuck her well everyday, I talk about her work, hobbies and other things she is interested. I show her attention, but not too much attention.
I found her reaching out to her male friends for emotional connection, which is very suspicious. Even if she is planning to branch swing, I want to understand what does it mean when she complains lack of emotional connection? It sounds like BS, but I'm too much of a newbie to figure this out myself.
gratefulapply 1d ago
Being a total dominating force in a relationship isn't possible. You gotta give them a little bone, dude. Stay strong and listen to her vent every once in a while. After pounding her to her very core https://coreball.co, I make sure to give her a good embrace. The process of truly understanding her
Intrepid_Place53900 1w ago
( I found her reaching out to her male friends for emotional connection)
That's a deal breaker right there man.
but, for future LTR's.
Do you do anything with them, other than hanging out and Fuckin.
Have you clearly committed to each other, exclusive?
You let her talk about her day,etc.
If she still wants more, she's probably high maintenance. Explain to her you like your quiet time, you don't like to talk about your day,etc for hours. Explain what you enjoy , like in your daily routine. She can accept that or not.
My girl knows she's limited to about 15 minutes of daily download, after that, let's go do something. If I mention something about my day , it's like 2 minutes. So, I practice what I preach.
Part of vetting, is figuring out if you are compatible. when I was young, I had a lot of girls who were verbal diarrhea. I learned that I enjoy quiet, and also found the girls who talked non stop were the most maintenance or drama. Don't be afraid to realize, hey, I don't like this in a girl, and move on. That's what the learning process is all about.
A girl should add value to "YOUR" life.
Never forget that
Lone_Ranger 1 1w ago
It's not a deal breaker - all women will do this. They'll always ask for more.
The important thing is not what she says, its how you react to what she says.
I would simply 'flip the script' on her. If she says she wants more emotional connection - I would say
"If you want something, you need to provide it. What are you going to do to create more emotional connection? Tell me how you are going to invest more emotion into this relationship?"
Don't be hostile. Say in in nice way, whisper it in her ear as you lie in bed. As always, show her who is leader, who is boss. That is what she wants.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
How is this better than OP just "getting it" and leading as such
I'm not sure how this is ideal to OP leading without having to explain anything. OP is probably already in his current situation for losing some of the plot, not sure OP could be reasonably expected to manage a direct conversation with his woman about this nor pass the ensuing shit and comfort tests from having an overt conversation
Lone_Ranger 1 1w ago
It's really not that much of an 'overt' conversation.
My theory is that women will always challenge a man, and what they are looking for is failure.
They want to challenge the guy (shit test, comfort test etc) and they want to be defeated. The moment they are defeated, they realise that they are not in charge, and that the man is the leader. Then they will feel better, they will feel like they are in a relationship that is going somewhere.
You know what makes a woman feel uncomfortable in a relationship, what gives her fear and anxiety? When she challenges the man and he crumbles. That not only gives her the ick and the dry panties, it makes her fearful. She is in a boat with no captain.
I am telling OP to challenge her by flipping the script.
This is the way.
If OP cannot do that, then he is not ready to be in an LTR.... as @Typo-MAGAshiv has already alluded to.
shockreserve 1w ago
The way you describe flipping a script, is perfect.
I stopped for a sec and remembered how many times I did it this way.
It forces her in position to work for relationship even in ltr
The position she initially should have been in and then contiue to be. Virtually this is the only mental exercise women do in relationship. Take that away and they will eventually try to find other dude to fight for.
What I did as extension of flipping a script was to:
Both increase her investment, sensation of your interest and investment, accountability for asking shit test questions (but follow trough has to be done as promissed)
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
That makes sense
pofkaf 1w ago
It means she is bored in the relationship. Women need to be on an emotional rollercoaster in order to "feel a commection." So you need to do the alpha shit, but also the beta shit. Mix in the negative with the positive.
Typo-MAGAshiv 1 1w ago
How long have you two been together? If you say anything less than a year, then it's not an LTR. it might be a relationship in which you two are exclusive, but LTRs are measured in years.
Secondly, read Athol Kay's "Married Man Sex Life Primer" and HumanSockPuppet’s Guide to Managing Your Bitches.
The reason most newbies are told to stop displaying beta/comfort qualities and to display almost exclusively alpha/arousal qualities is that when a woman receives unearned beta/comfort or too much too soon, it repulses them.
What's frequently left out, though, is that if you find a woman whom you want to stick around, you need to provide beta/comfort when she has earned it.
This does not mean crying like a bitch while the two of you watch chick flicks together.
Check out Rian Stone's YouTube channel, especially his sidebar companion series. These are not meant to replace reading the sidebars at TRP and/or MRP, but rather assist in understanding what you read.
Anyway, you probably aren't ready for an LTR yet anyway.
whytehorse2021 1w ago
I think it might mean you're not showing passion during sex. Read Sex God Method.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
You can't be straight alpha in a relationship. You have to throw them some bones man. Listen to an occasional rant while being her rock during it. Giving her a good cuddle enough of the time after plowing the absolute shit out of her. Getting to actually know her
I assume you got into the long term relationship for the LONG TERM part
You're probably treating her like a FWB or a plate
.
Also too many guys think that being beta creates cheating but if you are failing the LONG TERM part of the LTR that's when a lot of girls who are otherwise really attracted to you start reaching out to their simps and orbiters to cover there other bases and start emotionally branching out.
I'm not saying be beta, quite the opposite. Be alpha but you need rapport and connection to sustain a relationship you can't just fuck her and then be like lololollol breadcrumbs lolololol on the other stuff you have to actually have a relationship WITHOUT descending into a lovey dovey beta fag.
There's a way to lead a relationship like a man
Edit: changed with to without that was a typo
MrSupreme 1w ago
I was just about to say the same, it's not about becoming an emotional statue of an alpha wolf lion gorilla guy, flexibility is key,you can be stoic when she's on her period but the rest of the time you gotta show some feelz, some outrage,some surprise and some loving caressing even
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
Too many autistically alpha men don't realize that plowing a woman when she's undert the daze of feeling warm and affectionate is part of the rollercoaster and she wants that.
She doesn't want the same sex or same day every day. Replace her need for variety of dick with variety of experience