I'm 30M virgin never had any sort of romantic or physical experience I've never even had my 1st kiss putting how pathetic and depressing that is behind lol I've been thinking i should just visit a escort to get the experience it's not the way i wanted it to be but here i am , there's alot of reasons i have just had 0 luck with women I'm ugly guy was overweight although lost some weight still nowhere near desirable, also the idea of being nice and all that BS just doesn't mean anything also a big part is I'm nervous around people but not bad I've been able to make friends and talk to strangers but when its trying to be something more or flirting and with women i just get extremely self conscious and anxious. Being honest a big part is being so self conscious/anxious a woman would even want to be with me causes me alot of anxiety and doubt plus the idea of making the move to be physical touching a woman and worrying I'm being too much
But with all that i still think my best course of action (realistically) is to go through with paying for a experience but my main concerns are safety in every sense i worry about being hurt/robbed although i can defend its a worry , the actual anxiety of doing it being i have no idea what I'm doing sure I've watched porn so i understand the absolute basics and I've watched/read stuff about sex but its obviously not anywhere bear the same thing , i also worry about actually being physical and actually touching a woman makes me kind of nervous especially a woman who doesn't want me to touch her its just a business transaction at the end of the day .
Any advice on the anxiety and how to actually go through with it big worry is ill be so anxious i wont be able to go through with it or just relax enough
although it brings alot of anxiety for me i guess i was wondering for anybody who's ever used escorts what's the best way to approach it ?
sorry if this is something discussed alot
Lone_Ranger 1 4w ago
There is probably a lot more going on here than just being a virgin. You also mention that you are fat, don't drive and tbh, you write like a 12 year old.
I am doubtful whether fucking a whore is going to solve any of your problems.
milkkrate00001 4w ago
well you cant read apparently i said i "was" fat and yeah i cant drive its expensive and im a carer for my mom so. i appreciate the English lesson
Lone_Ranger 1 4w ago
You appreciate it, but you still refuse to you use punctuation. It's hard to take you seriously, if you can't put in the least bit of effort.
milkkrate00001 3w ago
it is nice to know no matter how pathetic I feel sometimes I'll never be a loser to the degree you are that I am appreciative for
Lone_Ranger 1 3w ago
There's a lot of rage and anger, probably stemming from a lot of hurt. I wish you well brother, so I'm not going to trade insults with you. All men are brothers. I hope you get to fix your issues and have a good life.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
Male virginity doesn't mean shit. It doesn't matter how you lose it.
If you were 20 I'd be saying dude don't fuck an escort but at 30 dude you have too many fucking mental hangups about sex. This is late to lose it, you need to just get it over with at this age.
I don't know what the legality of your area is so that's a #1 concern. If you live in an area that has legal prostitution that's one thing if you're in an area where this has to be more back pages type shit i would seriously not do it.
Hit tinder or fuck a club slut if prostitution is illegal in your area. Male virginity has no value just lose it to someone who you don't think will make your dick fall off and definitely wear a condom
milkkrate00001 1mo ago
yeah theres alot of things tied up in the virginity thing not just no sex because its not crazy but i've had 0 experiences with women i've never even had a kiss so
eh its not legal for sure . Online dating is a waste of time I'm too ugly for it I've had 0 success i cant really go to clubs my city don't allow men alone into bars plus i don't drink and i'd be way to anxious to approach group of women anyway who I'm sure would just reject me guess im just paying to not be rejected lol
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
Jesus Christ dude
Without doxxing yourself where are you at? A big City, small town? Give us some gist of your shit hole
milkkrate00001 1mo ago
England sort of smallish city England is pretty depressing dump
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
Is there not anything more exciting within a 30 minute driving distance?
For example, if i want even easier pussy than my area i can drive an hour to the next city over and chicks there will ask me to go home with them
milkkrate00001 1mo ago
i don't drive sadly. the closest big city is far away from me but i don't think it make much difference if im honest
Lucky you
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
Okay the more you respond the more it's apparent you have an opportunity choke point edit: i meant bottleneck
There's a lot going on here for you
milkkrate00001 1mo ago
yeah very much so kinda just stuck i dont have the ability to use tinder or something and get matches in other places lets say either
Electrical_Tackle 1mo ago
If you are going to do it... Pay an expensive one, those hot 19 college slim whore who charges a lot. Because, why not. If you gonna do coke, better go pure. If you pay a $50 fatty... Yeah, regret.
I'll tell you my experience: I paid once, more than 10 years ago. Got a half-dick. Cummed inside her (in condom) cause i didn't know i was cumming, because i dind't felt, because i was nervous and half-dick. So, yeah. You can expect this because there will be no intimacy. But if you pay a slender young hot bitch who kiss and suck without condom, at least you'll enjoy. But won't have any pride.
milkkrate00001 1mo ago
hahaha true i thought it cost me like 100 but alot more but its worth paying more for a 10
yeah it doesnt seem like the greatest experience i'm not expecting my life to be changed lol just get the experience since IRL its just not possible atleast get my 1st kiss...kill me
Maturin_nj 1mo ago
Yes do it. You are in control of the encounter bec you are paying. Do your homework and find a decently attractive one. And dont be a tool omega and fall in love with her. Its just business. Don't go with a slag in your area. Take a train to a larger city like Birmingham. Pay up but not super high end. No Shame in it. Take control of your sex life if you want one. No one is going to do it for you. Especially women.. Don't allow the matriarchy, the Anglican church, obedient males or anyone else tell you what to do. Go in and fuck her with pride and confidence.after Start losing weight and learn how to get chicks.. you can still use escorts in the meantime to learn some skills.
Getting accustomed to good looking escorts will build your confidence with women. If you do-nothing your current life is your future life. Don't be the guy on reddit in 15 years writing girls don't like me, never held hands, a 45 yr old virgin. This is your crises point. Act now to change your destiny
milkkrate00001 1mo ago
FACTS mate i appreciate it i didnt think id ever be the 30 year old virgin fuck being the 40
First-light 1mo ago
Its legal in UK. Brothels (places where more than one whore works) are not legal but prostitution is fine, so relax there.
You can come at this slowly. Some call girls have a service for introducing men to sex. This may be worth seeking out. You don't have to do it all in one go. Just get used to the physicality of women gradually and relax into enjoying it. You can even start with just a massage from a non whore to get used to being physically close to women. A whore is a present you bought yourself, so enjoy her. Treat her well -as you should any employee- try to make her work experience easy and pay fairly but save simping or gift giving for real girls. You are allowed to just enjoy yourself. You don't have to do anything right like you might to make sure a girlfriend climaxes. You paid for it, enjoy it. She will be happy when you cum and she knows her work is done.
Remember whores are usually piece workers -they are generally paid by the nut. Sure if you pay her for an hour and cum twice its all good but as a general rule the client will cum and be done. So long as he feels he has had a little squeeze, a little fiddle, a little ride and shot his load, he will go home happy and she can get onto doing something else -like texting her friends or busting another guy out for the same amount of money. The average whore, particularly the cheaper ones want to bust you out and get onto the next guy's wallet fast. A nervous virgin coming into this may not get the best experience. I would recommend initially approaching a whore for "driving lessons" -where she knows what she is helping you with and expects to work the whole hour or whatever you book her for. (An hour at first might be a good idea but use the first half to relax and just cuddle and chat at the start).
Kissing whores?! I wouldn't. You know where they have been -everywhere. I also wouldn't go anywhere near any other orifice with your mouth unless you were HPV vaccinated and even then best not. In your shoes I might be tempted though as you want to learn things. If so, when you make contact, ask her what hours she works. Then book her first appointment. Unless she is a crack head or something else skanky (the bargain end of the market), she will at east wash before work and will have eaten and cleaned her teeth since her last blowjob. Otherwise you are licking some other guy's saliva and maybe worse plus a wide sample of other guys' bacteria.
Do not book more than one session at first. You might not like her personality enough to really enjoy her and some women are just not very attractive physically to some men no matter what they look like.
Once you have experience of the act, you will probably want to know how to please women physically. Remember this takes time to learn and that women are like cars -the mechanics are roughly the same in all models but different models drive very differently. Whores can help you here but remember they are entertainers first and foremost. They act experiencing pleasure so you experience pleasure. If you want to know how to please women, you will have to ask them to explain and how you. They will lie about whether or not you are pleasing them. So if you just start rubbing on their clitoris they will give you the full fake orgasm routine in quick time -so you get on to busting your load. This leaves you non the wiser except that you have touched a woman's clitoris. However if you ask for instruction and ask "do I do it like like this or like that" "How much pressure?" "Long strokes or circles" you will probably have learned something useful by the end, even if the feedback has been over enthusiastic.
milkkrate00001 1mo ago
so best go through a brothel ? i dont understand how i tell them im a virgin and the driving lesson thing do i do that prior to booking or when i meet them ?
I absolutely agree about getting to relax around women especially in terms of sex and being naked the idea makes me super anxious having time to chill and unwind before would be a big help
just the whole talkign about sex and stuff makes me nervous lol i need time to relax but i guess it just means ill have to spend more money to get more time with one
Maturin_nj 1mo ago
Find one that you like. Remember you are in control of the transaction not her. She may ask if you want anything special. you could text her or emsil her saying this is my first time are you good with that. The guy above had good advice. She's going to know you have anxiety issues. It's OK. Youhave to break thru this not being able to talk to women issue. After 4 or 5 experiences that will fade. This is why going this route is good for you. You are lucky your only 30. You can turn all this shit around. You are demonstrating you've got balls. A lot of guys in your situation are afraid. And do nothing.
Not all escorts have a heart of gold like in the movies. Investigate and research like your buying a high grade product like a pc. 1. Does she have reviews. Do other dudes vouch for her. There are review sites on line. Hate to see you get scammed the first time. 2. Your first experience may not be great or what you expected. Thats fine. Your doing this not only for sexual experience but also social. 3.know what the cost is going in. If she tries hitting you up for more money stand up for yourself. Tell her forget it. That's all youhave. Be willing to walk away with your money. She sucks anyway. There are a million escorts nowadays competing for your biz. 4. Be courteous and considerate. Do not become a simpy pushover.. don't act needy. She's not your mother. 5. If she asks why your a Virgin. Tell her your busy at university or working all the time. That's it. 5. Do not pay a deposit. Cash in envelope when you arrive. Don't go low end. Go middle grade. If she works out of a pretty decent hotel its a good sign.
Lastly turn your fucking life around. Read all the sidebar info 2 or 3 times. Forget all the bullshit about love and romance you've been led to believe. Go from ugly guy to masculine man. You start by building your body. Hitting the gym. Lifting. And running. If you are lazy none of thus will help. Only you can fix you. Stop being passive. Keep in touch with your progress. It'll take a good 3 years to improve your looks, mind, and confidence. People who knew the old you won't recognize you. Get to work.
First-light 4w ago
All solid advice here.
milkkrate00001 4w ago
Thanks man i appreciate that yeah i think same if i pay i can learn to just be around a woman if anything as its a big issue for me already the other stuff can be a cool bonus
I appreciate all the words man it means alot thanks
First-light 4w ago
No reason not to use a brothel but its illegal and more of a production line.
This is not my subject area -I frequented a brothel for 2 or 3 months a couple of decades ago but that is my only actual experience with whores. I do however have a close friend who seems to have huge experience with the area. I understand that you can research individual call girls, look through their pictures and what they say about themselves and then just email or message them to set things up. You can start it all by message first which is less embarrassing. I think you just have to find the sites a number of call girls advertise on and filter for area and your preferences.
I think it would cost more setting up something more bespoke but I think it could be really worth it in your situation where you just need to relax and get experience.
Looks are not everything with enjoying a woman and you can probably save a bit by paying for 8 out of ten but with a good resume -maybe mentioning introduction to sex- and a kind face rather than 9.5 out of ten who knows she can get easy money from anyone and may not work as hard to relax and please you.
milkkrate00001 4w ago
I appreciate the help. yeah for sure i think its goign to cost alot more than i imagined but im fine with saving for that if its the best suited thing
Maturin_nj 4w ago
No problem. Once you get to work on the improvement phase, lifting running body you'll start seeing positive changes by Christmas. This will bring greater confidence. Once you have the basic women issues cleared up you'll realize that they are not goddesses. They cannot do a fraction of the stuff you can do. They are not your judge. Talk to them like you talk to us or your guy friends. This is key. No woman gets any special treatment from you unless it's deserved. Reciprocated. Special exception for helping old ladies lol. That's OK.
Eventually you'll be able to pass on what you learned and help other guys climb out of the hole you were in.
Ask questions, post progress reports, girls you meet irl. Read other posts. Educate youself until you know the sidebar info inside and out. You'll start to learn game and use it. But most of all understand why it works. It's not easy. Crawl before you walk. We want you to succeed.