edit. i'm talking about a situation where i'm already alone with a girl in a cafe where couples go to. i thought you were supposed to help me fuck instead of telling me to go fuck myself....
I lost 20kg. I still need to lose 30kg to not be fat.
A girl takes my picture and shows it to me. I feel bad about how fat I am. It makes me feel like I'm not supposed to escalate. Outside she wants to take my picture. I run away because I'm fat.
I am very self critical.
I'm not used to asking what I want and taking what I want. In my mind, I give them "space" because if they actually want me, they will fill that space. The reason I'm doing this: I am trying to maximize odds of my happiness, not trying to maximize odds of sex
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
ish
I hear you.... but women tend to be more passive and apply the above logic to YOU.... "if he wants me, he'll take me".
Generally you want to be able to escalate while knowing the difference between "no" and "not yet" and "too far but I like it".
Bottom line is that you need to lose the weight.
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
what's our version of "I give them space because if they actually want me, they will fill that space"? does our version even exist?
thanks for your comment mattyanon. if you have the time, i'd appreciate your input on a few more things. 2 & 3 are life advice questions
1- i could try escalating before i get a clear sign, but then i'd feel like "what i'm taking" aka her is responding positively just because i'm taking it, not because she wants me. do we actually need to take all or most of the time? is this our burden?
2- i am in the process of losing weight. my real problem might be lack of socializing. i'm not confident in groups or in social venues. idk how to act sometimes or often. it's visible to others. it's like i am an uncultured peasant sometimes. i guess i just gotta practice and accept some things cannot be learned/improved if you miss the train & come from a wrong place?
3- i can't accept nature of western women. i am traveling long term and i don't live anywhere too long. most girls in hostels appear to be sluts. their body is great sometimes but i can't feel genuine interest or desire to connect with them knowing how much they're into getting drunk (and consequently fucked by randos). when i look into their eyes, i feel like i'm a wall. even a 70 year old western woman is proud to talk about her slut past in a table where we hostel guests eat dinner. this culture is just disgusting to me.
i could find a religious girl using family connections but then i'd be marrying her family and i'm an atheist. i also want more experience before considering that. so how can i make use of these girls i keep meeting? how can i want sluts, at least enough to want to game them?
maybe this is too romantic and too much relationship minded. i want to like the girl as a person, and this means a virgin or virgin-like. someone who got drunk/high makes poor decisions and probably got fucked.
i dislike these sluts but i still kinda want something from their femininity, so sometimes i keep the convo going with 0 connection. it's not working.
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
Not in the same way.
Women reserve the right to be passive, we reserve the right to chase other women.
You get to be more passive after you've fucked her twice..... and/or if she's not measuring up to your standards.
correct
Basically yes this is our burden. But if it helps at all: women will only allow escalation if they like you.
Sometimes they will be clear they want escalation, and sometimes they'll escalate, but don't count on it. Weirdly women escalate with men who they sense are unafraid to escalate with them, but have chosen not to because they are fucking other women.
good!
You can improve all this. You gotta be doing it. The worse you are at socialising the more you need to do it. Social contact of all forms gets you better with women. Don't hide - get out there and do it and learn.
right
Right.
Well, don't look for nice girls in nasty places.
Marriage is a terrible fucking deal for men. No sex, legally mandated provisioning, no options, no respect.
re sluts: If you don't want them you don't want them.
right. nice girls are rare though.
So what do you want from them? And what do they want?
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
This was very helpful mattyanon. Thank you.
Where do you look for nice girls?
How can we find them? I am location in-dependent so I can go to wherever they are in the world. I thought about writing books for teens to create a funnel so I can meet girls before they turn into sluts. I even looked into how I can meet nuns. But didn't pursue these ideas further
I don't know. Their body I suppose. Maybe I dislike them because there's no positive interaction yet and all I see is they're probably hoes. I noticed if a connection somehow develops with a probable hoe, I like them.
Idk what they want. They're just typical solo travelers. Hot guys have the advantage of receiving positive interest from the get go, unlike me. I get positive interest only after they get to know me.
I want to fuck enough white girls and I want intimacy with some of them in a way that feels genuine/real/fitting. Then I will compare them to the girls from where I am from. Then I'll choose which one marry. I come from a religious culture but am an atheist. (I'll marry only if I make sure it cannot screw me over. This depends on future CRS laws)
My life so far is kinda empty in terms of intimacy, connections and desirable girls. I am not sure but I want to have exes I can visit and maybe fool around in different places. I want to feel like I lived, I connected deeply with human beings, I accumulated memories that makes me happy. I am not ready to die yet mainly because I did not live enough.
What might be best is finding a super hot girl, being a great fit and then just continuing that. Instead of dealing with multiple random girls with memories and connections scattered around
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
Fuck knows.
Well, I think you've got the right idea.... create a funnel around getting the girls you want.
Be careful though..... nice girls don't stay nice. And marriage is the worst of all traps.
So you want their body, but you don't want them to be slutty?
Sounds like you're a terrified virgin.
How about this..... meet, date and fuck women, and THEN decide what you like, once you can actually do it.
Anyone can say "I'm too good for these girls" while not fucking them. Great ego defence.
because fat
right
ok, so do that....
Ok, do it.
Get fit dude. Get a six pack.
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
100% yes. I am 100% ok with blue balls if they are not slutty. If she's not a slut, I can be more patient.
Maybe they're too good for me socially and physically, and I'm too good for them in other ways. I see sluts as kind of evil, even though I fucked escorts.
While talking to a non slut, I'm a lot more patient and motivated to seduce. Aren't you? How do you operate with sluts vs non sluts? You just get a six pack so you don't need to seduce hard?
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
not sure that my experience relates to yours at all. I'm not looking for marriage or exclusivity, so I evaluate what I put in vs what I get. Occasionally I can have a fling with a slutty girl, usually they are a poor fit and don't offer much and it doesn't work.
yes. exactly this.
No-Stress-Cat 1mo ago
Is this a shitpost? Read the sidebar, man.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
He's been teetering on a ban warning for his previous posts.
Dude, @imstartingtolikehoes which part of RP are you not understanding
[deleted]
whytehorse2021 1mo ago
I'll just give him the woke AI answer. haha
financehardo420 1mo ago
Haven’t seen u here in a fat minute fucker
whytehorse2021 1mo ago
Yeah I'm in the situation you were in when I left: healing from rotator cuff surgery. 2mos away from permission to hit the gym. Can't even ride my bike. :(. How are things going these days?
financehardo420 1mo ago
Damn brother that sucks fuckin ass. I’m still recovering from it but highly recommend looking into bpc157 and tb500; helped tremendously.
Excited as fuck im ab to hop on my first cycle of test; starting out w like 100-150mg/week to see how I respond to it >=]
whytehorse2021 1mo ago
I take 100mg/wk. That will just put you at normal levels and shut down your own production...
MrSupreme 1mo ago
The weight kinda helps in some positions,also, jog.
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
which positions
EurasianChad 1 1mo ago
You can't attract girls organically and go places with it if you don't feel good enough in yourself.
Fat guys pull heavily only because they fully believe they are THE MAN.
Lose the weight. When you do, you build self belief. It's hard losing a ton of fat. Few can do it to a large degree. Once you do it, bro anything is possible.
whytehorse2021 1mo ago
It sounds like you've been working hard on your health by losing 20kg, that's a great accomplishment! It's also completely understandable to feel self-conscious, but remember your worth isn't defined by your weight. Here are some tips that might help:
Flirting and Confidence:
Taking Initiative:
About Weight and Attraction:
Here are some additional resources that might be helpful:
Remember, you deserve to be happy and confident, regardless of your weight. Keep focusing on your health goals, celebrate your progress, and put yourself out there! You might be surprised by the positive response you get.
Problematic_Browser 1 1mo ago
That feeling is called "shame" and you should absolutely be feeling it.
Why?
Because maybe it will motivate you to get off your fat ass. Here's the thing my guy: there's no "body positivity" for men - other men will judge you, women will shame you, and the world will make you suffer for it.
Fortunately, you're a man - once you start lifting, eating right, and getting adequate sleep you can turn it around in ~6 months.
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
i'm talking about a situation where i'm already alone with a girl in a cafe where couples go to. i thought you were supposed to help me fuck instead of feel shame
Problematic_Browser 1 1mo ago
You are under a grave misconception.
Trp.Red and the men here are not here to help you fuck. We are here to help you take the steps you need to become a man that is, as a byproduct, worth fucking.
And I will absolutely shame you over shameful behavior. Your body is literally the only thing you have total control over and you're letting it go to shit just like every other cheeto eating normie. It would be one thing if you were able to look in the mirror and say "this is my body and I'm okay with the consequences that come with this", but you aren't... And that's a good thing.
It means you have some give a shit somewhere in there that can be saved.
Get your body in order. Trust me on this - I used to be a 5, now I'm an 8 and the sexual world is far different up here.
financehardo420 1mo ago
Facts. 100% facts. And ya me and all my boys will call each other out if one of us starts letting ourselves go
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
nice way to put it.
ok so what do i do until then? that's at least 3 months. i'm meeting a few attractive girls every day
AbusiveFather1 1mo ago
maybe you specifically are not supposed to but there's people like Barry White who was overweight yet one of the biggest sex-symbols of his time. being lean helps but you won't get any women just because you've lost weight
Lone_Ranger 1 1mo ago
Are you looking for the honest answer?
Forget all about fuck/flirt and fix the problem. It is very easy to lose weight. It requires no special equipment, no skill and no investment. And idiot can do it.
But do it you must. And the time to start? Today. Tomorrow is to late. Today is the day.
You say you are 'very self critical'. Somebody that was really self critical would never say that. In fact, I suspect that you are too easy on yourself. I can tell because you are linking flirting / fucking with you weight problem. They are not related.
Fix your weight issue right now, and forget about flirt/fuck.
My advice to you is as follows;
Running. At least 5k every day. Every damn day, even in the rain and the snow.
Check this out
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Xyh6EwSfjw
And then tell me, which one is your fav? Notice how they all have their own style. They make it their own.
The thing about intense exercise is that it is all about the joy of suffering. You need to experience discomfort. You need to make peace with pain. There is no joy without suffering.
You are fat because you do not understand this. You have only want joy and pleasure (eating) and you reject any suffering. I will tell you this - a life lived in avoidance of suffering leads to misery.
I said that it was easy to get rid of weight. Do this for me - run 5k every morning (only takes 30 mins) and do 8 x 2 minute rounds of skipping every evening. Do that for 90 days and then come and tell me that I'm wrong.
Oh, and quit sugar. All refined sugar. Most of all the stuff you drink.
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
until i'm not fat, i'll meet 200-300 attractive girls. what am i gonna do with them?
Lone_Ranger 1 1mo ago
Did you even understand my post soldier? Can you read?
Did you click on the link? Did you go for a 5k run yesterday?
I'm going answer for you ........no you didn't.
Now I'm going to tell you why. Because you are a lazy, self indulgent, deluded cuck. You think that you can sit around being fat and that somehow you 'deserve' some of these 200-300 attractive girls.
If you don't have the discipline to the easiest of tasks (not be fat) then what can you offer to the world? Why would anyone take you seriously?
btw - if you have come to this forum expecting kid gloves, validation and sympathy, you are in the wrong place.
Tell me more about why you pamper yourself, why you behave like a spoilt little girl giving yourself dopamine hits with sugar and excessive food? Why? Why do you avoid suffering? What do you think a life time of self indulgence will lead to? Why are you fat?
Answer me those questions before we go any further.
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
bitch my speed of weight loss was so fast that i gave myself a health problem that prevented me from walking for 2 months. my question was never about weight loss. it is about what i wrote. you didn't answer the question. you wasted my time. you insulted me. fuck off
Lone_Ranger 1 1mo ago
It is exactly as I thought. You can't tolerate feedback. You didn't answer the questions. You don't want solutions, you want validation, sympathy.
You are the waste of time dude.
You're incapable of facing up to yourself. Ok big guy, tell me the answer - what are 'going to do with teh 200-300 attractive girls that you meet, while you are fat?'
Go on, tell us the answer. You clearly don't want to listen to anyone else, so please go ahead and tell us.
imstartingtolikehoes 1mo ago
you're autistic
Lone_Ranger 1 1mo ago
Exactly as I thought. Lazy.