I come seeking advice on how to not be goofy all the time, Everyone around me dont really take me serious these days. When ever there is a chance to make a joke, I crack it, even lame ones, I cant stop myself. And I act very immature at times. Do you guys have any advice on how to be more mature and serious ?
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RiverChill41 1y ago
I didn't see it said already so I'll chime in. The question is why are you constantly cracking jokes? If it's to win approval or because you are most comfortable when people find you funny, I'd recommend taking it down a notch. You say people around you don't take you seriously, and how could they if all their interactions are you being a comedian. So how to be more mature and serious? Practice not cracking jokes or trying to be funny. Listen when people are talking and take a pause before responding. Give yourself a few seconds before chiming in so you have an opportunity to take control of your actions. If there is silence, say at a table at lunch, or in a group conversation, ride that silence and be okay with it. People will appreciate you not barraging them with weak comedy, and it'll give you the ability to use timing when you do act or say something funny, which will make you more entertaining. Win win.
Ong252 1y ago
Thank you, I think I started cracking jokes to get approval coz i was very socially anxious now that's not the case but I still make jokes, I will employ the method you have suggested
maxtheberger 1y ago
No you do you man, fuck what anyone else thinks.
nicknack 1y ago
Get more attractive, a chad cracking jokes is hilarious, a normal dude cracking jokes is a dancing monkey. Get Invisalign so at least when you crack that goofy smile you can’t help, it’ll look pretty.
Something I found successful as a guy who used to be a clown was thinking of shit that genuinely makes me really sad.
There was a study done that showed that women find happy men way less attractive than sad ones, so if you can’t be normal be sad.
Ong252 1y ago
Yea I'm working on my physique That's an interesting study, Ill try working on that
nicknack 1y ago
I recently broke things off with a chick I was with for 3 years, too many other women in my rotation and she was starting to be depressed about not getting wifed up. I was genuinely really sad. The next night I stopped by a lounge passing through Vienna Austria and we met a group of 8-9s, blonde blue eyed uni girls etc, and my sadness must have resonated to them as they were all over me. I didn’t smile once, and fucked the hottest one all night. I’m usually the dude smiling and having a ball, and it never works as well as being emotionally cold dude with sadness in his eyes.
A quick google search on my phone pulls this up, it’s relevant study not the exact one I saw but it confirms the same finding https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/05/110524070310.htm
Ong252 1y ago
Damn that is really interesting, thanks for the link Ill check it out
User4566 1y ago
Sometimes being serious and mature makes you look like a square. I think it's a good thing to be a little goofy and not act like you have a stick up your ass 24/7.
No-Stress-Cat 1y ago
+1 for use of a the phrase "look like a square". That's some old school shit right there...
Ong252 1y ago
Yea that is true but I'm goofy all the time which makes which is not the best way to be most of the time.
User4566 1y ago
It depends because I knew class clowns even in college and they were liked by everyone because they gave off a positive and happy energy around them and people liked being around them. Now, if you're being goofy and no one is laughing or chuckling or even smiling then chances are you're annoying. But I'll give you credit for at least being yourself. That's a positive in my book because if you're acting like yourself and if people like you for it, you'll know who really likes you as a person vs the image you portray yourself to be. You'll also learn who DOESN'T like you which is also a positive because you know who to avoid.
But I will say this: I remember a guy in my class last semester who tried too hard to be witty and would make the worst jokes ever and the professor would pretend to laugh to not hurt his feelings. I could tell he was on the spectrum because he really couldn't bring himself to STOP making jokes and commenting on certain things. He acted like life was a sitcom. He was a smart guy, but just was a high-functioning autistic person. He wasn't dumb at all, just kind of socially impaired.
Now I don't know who you are as a person, but MAYYYBBEE get tested for autism. I'm not saying you're a drooling retard either because I also tested myself for autism. I also have some social issues that I just needed to practice with so there's a good chance that's all you need but if you REALLY can't help yourself then you might have an underlying issue.
[deleted] 1y ago
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