Or why everyone confuses "alpha" with "asshole"
Once you swallow the pill you can't not see it. AF/BB is everywhere and there are few exceptions, if any. But was it always this way?
My understanding of a basic RP concept is that women shit test as a mechanism to determine fitness as a mate, and that this has been going on since right around the time men figured out how to make fire.
I also understand that feminism has created a schism by teaching men that women want a guy who's sensitive, etc. The majority of men in Western culture have been taught (brainwashed) this by our single moms and by television going on several generations now...and we attempt to emulate the "nice guy" because that's what we've been taught....and of course we get shit on, rejected, divorce raped, etc.
So you have a small percentage of "alpha bad boys" nailing all the women. But perhaps that small percentage simply represents the percentage of antisocial rulebreakers you see in any society. Whether they are sociopathic, completely selfish and narcissistic, just plain don't care, or are just mean, these men simply represent the percentage of men who won't follow the program.
Since modern feminism has set the rules against men so they fail, only the minority of rulebreaking assholes end up passing the shit tests and generating the tingles. The majority of decent guys get shit on.
Was it always so? There seems to be this idea in RP thinking that AF/BB is the norm and has always been. I'm not so sure.
Seems to me that before feminism, you didn't have a majority of men attempting to be the Nice Guy™ because you didn't have feminist brainwashing and you had strong fathers that stuck around and taught their sons to be strong men instead of doughy pushovers. As a result the majority of men could pass the shit tests and generate the tingles...and here's the shocking part...without being an antisocial, bad boy, asshole!
Perhaps in bygone eras the paradigm of the Nice Guy™ couldn't have existed because you had a majority of genuinely nice men who were alpha at the same time...men who kept frame, passed the shit tests with flying colors, kept in shape, and generated the tingles.
These men would know how to be nice without having an orbiter's hidden agenda. These men could stand up for their women without being white knights because they weren't trying to suck up and get in some woman's pants....they would have already won said women and already had that pussy on lock because they were already alpha and could hold frame.
Moreover, these men would have provided for their women without being shit on. They wouldn't have had laws stacked against them allowing them to get divorced raped. Their women would be held accountable by society for bad behavior. These women would not be conditioned to equate human ATM's with sexless doormats because they'd be used to real men to whom they were primally attracted, but in whom they could count on to provide as well.
In other words, in a functional society where men aren't disposable second class citizens, shouldn't alpha fucks and beta bucks be the same fucking guy!?
Seems to me that the division between AF and BB is the result of the feminist matrix from which us TRP men have unplugged. Seems to me that strategies such as PUA, MGTOW, spinning plates, etc. are, at best, adaptations to a broken system. To put it in IT terms, these strategies are "patches" and "workarounds" but not actual "fixes." They allow for short term, individual solutions but they don't truly fix the larger problem.
I think those of you working on LTR game are the closest to having it right. You may have "oneitis" but you're applying game to keep her. Perhaps that's the way that God/Nature/whomever intended... you keep her safe and provide for her but you brook no nonsense and keep frame, causing her to desire you instead of ride the carousel.
Under such an ideal, the "bad boys" work for it just like the rest of us.
Thoughts?
TL;DR Is the fact that "bad boys" get all the 'ginas tingly due to AF/BB being an artificial schism instead of the ideological norm? Should both archetypes ideally be the same person?
bicepsblastingstud 10y ago
In the context of a LTR, the short answer is "yes." The long answer is as follows:
I suspect that many TRPers parrot AF/BB without really understanding what it means. In nearly any "blue pill example" post, you can see a whole litany of comments like "AF/BB confirmed", "she got her beta bucks, now she wants the alpha dick" and so on, even when it doesn't make much sense.
AF/BB describes the biological duality of females' mating imperatives. Essentially, women desire the genetic material of masculine, aggressive, alpha males, because it adds fitness to their potential offspring. Once they actually have the offspring, they tend to look for a provider male, to stick around and take care of the kids. You can see this in the way female attraction changes with ovulation.
TRP took these biological principles and used them as a lens through which to examine social behavior. There are many similarities: Women quite clearly desire men which display characteristics of the "alpha male," and they clearly look for provider males, especially once "the wall" starts setting in. Oftentimes a woman will settle down with a provider male, but she won't be able to shake her sexual desire for males with "alpha" characteristics, and she will cheat. In other cases, a woman will be sexually involved with an emotionally and spiritually unavailable alpha male, and so will keep several provider males (usually termed "beta orbiters") around to fulfill the "provide" function.
Thus we see the duality of "alpha fucks, beta bucks", as it were.
We also see how a male who both displays characteristics of reproductive fitness ("alpha" traits) as well as being a good provider is the ideal man for a woman to enter a relationship with. Gaining commitment from such a man is the main goal of girl game, and the endstate of the ladies over at r/redpillwomen.
Notice that I never claimed that provider traits are unattractive to women, which means that alpha and beta can (and should) coexist in one man in the context of a LTR. However, provider traits may not be unattractive, but they aren't attractive, either -- sexual attraction stems entirely from "alpha" traits.
The reason TRP exists is because overwhelmingly, males display all of the provider characteristics but none of the alpha, sexual characteristics.
[deleted] 10y ago
I would still say that it's the mans fault if his wife loses interest in him.
A good way to put it is that once you have a good LTR you have to work out, challenge yourself and game her harder than you would if you were a single guy. This is the main difference between TRP and the rest; men usually stop trying when they find a good girl.
drimadethistocomment 10y ago
and it's womens fault if I no longer find her attractive
BluepillProfessor 10y ago
This is insightful. In a normal functioning society "Nice Guys" have the moxy to pass the tests and generate the tingles. In our society, "Nice Guys" get shit tested, fail, and then get shit on. The only men who generate the tingles learn about Game or are natural psychopathic assholes.
I think in any marriage you have to be BOTH the Alpha fucks power banger and the Beta Bucks provider/helper.
Remember- "Nice" isn't really "nice" if you are only being "nice" to get laid.
Gold_Leaf_Initiative 10y ago
Historically speaking? Yes, absolutely.
Ojisan1 10y ago
I've been watching The Sopranos again and I realized that Tony Soprano actually is both alpha fux and beta bux. He's completely beta with his wife, but he's completely alpha with (most of) his goomars.
kick6 10y ago
Ideally AFBB is the same person. However, only apex females can accomplish it. For the average female, AFBB can only be accomplished with a pump & dump alpha and a stickaround beta.
mrpoopistan 10y ago
It depends on the chick.
There are women who are pure alpha addicts. There's always a chick who is out in a trailer park right now having the shit beaten out of her by an unemployed BF who she swears loves her.
There are women that like a lot of alpha with a drop of beta. This chick gets treated like shit, but at least her brings her flowers and apologizes.
There are women that take quite a bit of beta with a solid dose of alpha. The works like a dog guy who provides well and isn't looking to go to war with anyone, but also isn't a total pushover.
The big thing to remember is that there's no such thing as a woman who's a beta addict.
This is why calibration is important. A basic push-pull technique that drops some beta in is necessary with most women. Most women do need an occasional rose to keep them stringing along. Some women do actually expect a guy to still have a job (although they are slowly going extinct). On the other hand, no woman wants to watch you cry and hear you talk about your feelings.