Also, even when they don't approach, they do stuff to make it really fucking obvious that they're attracted to you. Anyone with decent social intelligence can see what's happening.
Anyone with decent social intelligence can see what's happening.
That's actually a bigger deal than many might realize. I am certain a somewhat insecure beta type gets approached much less frequently than mister pro athlete but chances are most guys that aren't super cringeworthy are getting approached at least now and then and don't yet know how to pick up on it.
most guys that aren't super cringeworthy are getting approached at least now and then and don't yet know how to pick up on it
I agree, and would say it's an even bigger problem that these types of guys have no idea how to act on it when it happens and usually blow it for themselves.
All right . so today , you are going to call around and get a cheap gym membership.
And you are going to start reading the sidebar in r/theredpill today .
OK ? I'll help you put together your lifting program tomorrow when you pm me and tell me how finding a gym went , and tell me which sidebar items you read .
Having to approach a man makes the man unattractive.
And though you imagine it'd be awesome to get hit on, if you really think about it, and are capable of such honest introspection, you'll realize that you feel differently about a girl you didn't chase. So, this works both ways.
A girl sees a guy that she thinks is hot. She'll make some effort to be noticed - maybe she'll walk by him a couple of times. Let's say that it's now obvious he's noticed her, but he just sits there. Something about his inaction makes him slightly less attractive to her.
Of course, some women will still approach some men. It's just that, if she has to approach him, he's already got a handicap. It'd be better if he had a spine. She'd be more attractive to him.
Similarly, a guy sees a girl that he thinks is hot. There are a ton of behaviors and indicators that she can do to drive him crazy (ever notice how a girl looking at you and then smiling (as opposed to just smiling already) is a turn on? Ever caught a girl looking at your crotch and she blushed when you caught her? How hot is that?) but walking over and introducing herself to you is not one of those things.
Of course, you'll probably still fuck her because hey, free pussy. But it's not what you really wanted.
So yeah, you want to chase and women want to be chased. Few people go the opposite way.
That's not true. I had a girl invite me to her birthday party to blow me in highschool. I made her clean some shit up for me then went. It was pretty hot. We dated twice for a couple months each and nearly had a third go round. Your game just doesn't include that possibility.
Firstly, women don't need to. Men are the ones with the strong sex drives, and women are the ones with natural SMV -- being young and having a vagina.
Secondly, women typically like dominance and aggression from men, while the reverse isn't true. It's usually only timid, unconfident men who want women to approach them.
Lastly, women derive value by the men that approach them. If no one is approaching them that makes them feel bad. Makes them feel undesirable, since women are supposed to get approached.
That said, if a man is really high SMV, they'll absolutely approach.
this. I'm fairly high SMV, i get approached a lot.
I also tend to notice that ugly women will often approach/ chase me, with absolutely no reciprocation on my part. i guess it's because no one/ few men hit on them directly, so they have to go out and get cock if they want it.
Women are more apt to approach at a college house party than in the middle of a funeral service or the middle of Manhattan.
I have always had mixed feelings about the contention that "It will be obvious when women approach, and if they don't it means you have a low SMV".
I say that because I know very very very VERY few men that have women approach them on a regular basis. And these men are the top 1%. Also - I have essentially maxed my physical SMV and women still do not approach me. It sucks, so I hope in the back of my mind that women in fact, do not approach all guys.
they approach, but in different (read, subtle, nondirect) ways.
Basically, they throw out IOI's. this is them approaching.
My ltr told me that when girls sleep with a guy (that gives them tingles), often they'll see it that they are the ones that pulled. Even though all they did was talk to him, if in a club dance near him, look at him, throw out subtle IOI's, and lower their ASD and let him take the initiative.
Only ugly chicks, at least in my experience, actually approach in the same way as guys, as that is the only way to act on their hypergamy otherwise they end up with reallllllly low smv dudes.
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karmasutur3 10y ago
Fixed that for you.
Protip: Women approach men.
kingofpoplives 10y ago
Yea...this happens to me pretty frequently.
Also, even when they don't approach, they do stuff to make it really fucking obvious that they're attracted to you. Anyone with decent social intelligence can see what's happening.
HS-Thompson 10y ago
That's actually a bigger deal than many might realize. I am certain a somewhat insecure beta type gets approached much less frequently than mister pro athlete but chances are most guys that aren't super cringeworthy are getting approached at least now and then and don't yet know how to pick up on it.
kingofpoplives 10y ago
I agree, and would say it's an even bigger problem that these types of guys have no idea how to act on it when it happens and usually blow it for themselves.
Beautiful_Idealism 10y ago
Years ago (I was probably 15) I actually went on a couple dates with a girl without realizing it.
[deleted] 10y ago
Hahahaah Thats the funniest shit I've read today
ghaenrynquau 10y ago
Alright. Thank you! It's fixed now.
[deleted] 10y ago
[deleted]
ghaenrynquau 10y ago
No.
Aerobus 10y ago
Go to the gym.
junk2sa 10y ago
Seriously, get in shape. Get in crazy good shape. Women will open conversation with you.
cmiovino 10y ago
Depends what 'good' shape means. For TRP purposes, this is BIG, jacked. If you're a skin flint, it means bulk up. If you're obese, it means cut.
dongpal 10y ago
you need to work out at least 3 years naturally to get a body which makes women open a conversation with you .....
thor_away92 9y ago
Lol no. Additing some kind of lean mass works wonders
dongpal 9y ago
I am lean and the first 2 years of training you look DYEL. After that you still need more mass to make a woman talk to you
karmasutur3 10y ago
All right . so today , you are going to call around and get a cheap gym membership.
And you are going to start reading the sidebar in r/theredpill today .
OK ? I'll help you put together your lifting program tomorrow when you pm me and tell me how finding a gym went , and tell me which sidebar items you read .
Decided2Go2Medschool 10y ago
Hey, I'm not OP. But can you help me too?
karmasutur3 10y ago
Anytime.
TagaKnight 10y ago
Can you help me too?
karmasutur3 10y ago
No. I fucking hate you.
Of course I will help you.
Thizzlebot 10y ago
Why don't you guys just goto /r/fitness, tagaknight isn't going to tell you some revolutionary secrets anyway.
karmasutur3 10y ago
http://www.reddit.com/r/karmasuture/comments/37ihtp/fuck_off_this_is_so_i_dont_have_to_copy_paste/
lots-of-tacos 10y ago
/r/fitness sucks dick
masterrod 9y ago
This is why
nicethingyoucanthave 10y ago
Having to approach a man makes the man unattractive.
And though you imagine it'd be awesome to get hit on, if you really think about it, and are capable of such honest introspection, you'll realize that you feel differently about a girl you didn't chase. So, this works both ways.
A girl sees a guy that she thinks is hot. She'll make some effort to be noticed - maybe she'll walk by him a couple of times. Let's say that it's now obvious he's noticed her, but he just sits there. Something about his inaction makes him slightly less attractive to her.
Of course, some women will still approach some men. It's just that, if she has to approach him, he's already got a handicap. It'd be better if he had a spine. She'd be more attractive to him.
Similarly, a guy sees a girl that he thinks is hot. There are a ton of behaviors and indicators that she can do to drive him crazy (ever notice how a girl looking at you and then smiling (as opposed to just smiling already) is a turn on? Ever caught a girl looking at your crotch and she blushed when you caught her? How hot is that?) but walking over and introducing herself to you is not one of those things.
Of course, you'll probably still fuck her because hey, free pussy. But it's not what you really wanted.
So yeah, you want to chase and women want to be chased. Few people go the opposite way.
MyRedAccount 10y ago
That's not true. I had a girl invite me to her birthday party to blow me in highschool. I made her clean some shit up for me then went. It was pretty hot. We dated twice for a couple months each and nearly had a third go round. Your game just doesn't include that possibility.
nicethingyoucanthave 10y ago
Quotes from my post:
"Of course, some women will still approach some men."
"Of course, you'll probably still fuck her"
Outliers outlie. I acknowledge "possibilities"
through_a_ways 9y ago
1) Women have a lower sex drive than men. This is because men have 17x more testosterone on average.
2) Women are much more risk averse and afraid of failure than men.
BrunoOh 10y ago
In a sense they do - IOI's are how a woman approaches. See /r/girlsmirin. If that happens to you, you're golden.
And of course, because women are crushed by rejection. Women hate risk.
Dr_Shakalu22 10y ago
Haha what a hilarious sub! Most of those would be "creepy" or "rapey" if men did it.
BrunoOh 10y ago
fixed.
There are a ton of hilarious little subs like that out there. Get out :)
Dr_Shakalu22 10y ago
Good catch.
Cyralea 10y ago
Couple of reasons.
Firstly, women don't need to. Men are the ones with the strong sex drives, and women are the ones with natural SMV -- being young and having a vagina.
Secondly, women typically like dominance and aggression from men, while the reverse isn't true. It's usually only timid, unconfident men who want women to approach them.
Lastly, women derive value by the men that approach them. If no one is approaching them that makes them feel bad. Makes them feel undesirable, since women are supposed to get approached.
That said, if a man is really high SMV, they'll absolutely approach.
CisWhiteMaelstrom 10y ago
You should message the mods to get EC flair.
[deleted] 10y ago
this. I'm fairly high SMV, i get approached a lot.
I also tend to notice that ugly women will often approach/ chase me, with absolutely no reciprocation on my part. i guess it's because no one/ few men hit on them directly, so they have to go out and get cock if they want it.
steelsoldat 10y ago
Women do approach men, I have never had to approach a woman in my life(and never have)
edit: saw OP's edit on top
Still worth posting because of title imo
a_nus 10y ago
Because they don't have to
metallica11 10y ago
could depend on the situation.
Women are more apt to approach at a college house party than in the middle of a funeral service or the middle of Manhattan.
I have always had mixed feelings about the contention that "It will be obvious when women approach, and if they don't it means you have a low SMV".
I say that because I know very very very VERY few men that have women approach them on a regular basis. And these men are the top 1%. Also - I have essentially maxed my physical SMV and women still do not approach me. It sucks, so I hope in the back of my mind that women in fact, do not approach all guys.
[deleted] 10y ago
they approach, but in different (read, subtle, nondirect) ways.
Basically, they throw out IOI's. this is them approaching.
My ltr told me that when girls sleep with a guy (that gives them tingles), often they'll see it that they are the ones that pulled. Even though all they did was talk to him, if in a club dance near him, look at him, throw out subtle IOI's, and lower their ASD and let him take the initiative.
Only ugly chicks, at least in my experience, actually approach in the same way as guys, as that is the only way to act on their hypergamy otherwise they end up with reallllllly low smv dudes.
masterrod 10y ago
They do if they are compelled too...
History and society have given them inherent value, that's like asking why doesn't pollen chase bees.
autoNFA 10y ago
Women are attracted to male initiative.
alpha_n3rd 10y ago
Maybe some have but you just didn't pick up on it?
[deleted] 10y ago
I wonder if OP sees IOIs but doesn't go for the approach himself?
alpha_n3rd 10y ago
Could be... wish I noticed IOIs, like, ever. Other people notice girls checking me out and I'm like "huh?"
[deleted] 10y ago
Haha I used to be the same way.
I love your username man wish I would've thought of it.
[deleted] 10y ago
[deleted]
[deleted] 10y ago
Figure out why your smv is low via the many checklists available in trp and fix it. It's that simple.