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- Hide Preview | 15 Comments | submitted 2 years ago by thereisnosuch [Post Locked]

Does anyone feel the same way as me? How do you guys cope with it and gain confidence to maintain self discipline and hope that it will pay off.

[-] pinstrap 9 Points 2 years ago

To me, confidence is achieved by doing something you fear, and doing it anyway. A martial arts Grandmaster isn't confident he can beat your ass because of some mood or frame of mind he's in, he's confident he can beat your ass because he's practiced his entire life and has fought many difficult opponents. The same concept can be applied to anything throughout life. If you're terrified to ask that girl out on a date, do it, and the next time you ask a girl out it won't be as nerve-wracking as it was before.

[-] Chinny4daWinny 3 Points 2 years ago

Question: Why am I scared to death to go to the gym this summer? I've been going for the past 3 years but everynight before I sleep, I keep telling myself I can skip tomorrow and just sleep in.

I've been going since early June so it should be easier to keep up the pattern, but I still feel as scared as I do today as I did last month.

Haven't skipped a day so far but that's because I have to get bigger and stronger.

[-] TheWeddingReversal 6 Points 2 years ago

idk man, anxiety is a weird thing. I have absolutely no anxiety about going to the gym or asking a girl out on a date but I get anxious before I go to work every day. I think we all have fears and chinks in our armor that make us apprehensive about doing certain things.

[-] Chinny4daWinny 1 Point 2 years ago

Yeah, that could be it.

[-] Laxman14 2 Points 2 years ago

What are you scared of? It's not just the gym, it's something else.

[-] Chinny4daWinny 2 Points 2 years ago

Just the fact that there's pain and hard work vs just eating at home and sleeping

[-] Laxman14 2 Points 2 years ago

Wait until you start seeing results. That'll change your outlook. If you do it at the same time each day, are consistent with when you go, it'll be much easier. You're building it up in your head, when it's really not THAT hard. Once you're in there doing it, you'll feel much better.

[-] FeedTheManBeast 1 Point 2 years ago

I cannot tell if this is rhetorical, or if you are seeking advice (joys of impersonal communication).

If it is advice - then pinstrap's point still stands, it doesn't matter why you find it scary and others do not. It doesn't matter how you rationalize why you shouldn't be scared. You just have to do the thing that is causing the fear (as you already are), and eventually it shall be over come.

Side note: Really goddamn throw yourself with an IDGAF attitude if you've been a complacent gym whelp, helps with the fear ;)

[-] Chinny4daWinny 1 Point 2 years ago

I'm actually seeking advice and thanks. I spend too much time wondering why I'm scared instead of saying fuck it and just doing it.

When I was in high school coach would push us in the weight room and now I'm going to college it's just me pushing myself which I have to learn to do

[-] Hunter2isit 4 Points 2 years ago

Its called fear of failure and it is a bitch defined by the need for external validation. So learn to self actualize, the fear will become nonexistent. As someone who was neglected as a kid, abused by my wife I get this is a hard one. Put your head down, be determined, get it done.

[-] Brian_Official 1 Point 2 years ago

This. You procrastinate because by not trying you won't feel the pain of your effort being good enough. It's a survival strategy you probably learned to adopt somewhere in childhood.

OP, just be aware of your self talk and when the procrastination comes up, tell it that what is doing, while well intended, is actually leading to a much more detrimental result in the long run.

[-] MrEiffel 2 Points 2 years ago

Or is it because you fear your best effort will turn out to be more than enough and your current failure is only due to your own weakness?

[-] kingofpoplives 1 Point 2 years ago

Grow some outcome independence. Really, it doesn't matter if you fail or not. Your life is just not that big a deal. So enjoy it.

[-] frequentlywrong 1 Point 2 years ago

How do you guys cope with it and gain confidence to maintain self discipline and hope that it will pay off.

Practice makes perfect. So what if your best is not good enough at the moment. Do it enough times and your best is going to become good.

[-] chealsonne 0 Points 2 years ago

yeah this is a tough one. i dont know an answer for this