I think my fundamental problem is being weak. I'm a quitter, soft, coward. My genes are weak. My dick is small, my fitness has always been bad since childhood, my body and immune system is weak. I don't know how to make long term plans. I don't have any control. I'm not liked.
I'm severely depressed and I refuse to see a shrink or get help. I have no friends or family.
I predict I'm going to kms in 2 years based on my past.
I wish to try not to be so weak but I don't do anything. I'm weak. I just stay weak. I watched maps of meaning, personality courses of jbp. TRP thought me how the world works but I got even more depressed after a while. I've read 100s of articles about depression and what my problem is psychologically. I know about what gives life meaning, what makes one function, how to be happy to live, what to do, where to start from. After years of search, I think my conclusion is that I am weak. Statistically some people are at the bottom, they exist to die or lose, they are the weak gene that's going to be removed from the gene pool. I think I belong there. I know the answer is taking action, baby steps and slowly building up. That's how transformation works. As I said I watched courses of JBP, I read TRP and articles about how people work. But I don't take action.
I wish to try not to be so weak but I don't fight with weakness. I give up. I gave in. That's quite literally who I am, if I observe my actions.
I think I'm ok with suicide. I've been mostly dead inside for a long time. I have nothing to lose because I have no life. It's just going to be freeing from suffering. My plan is to get away from people and end my life without any notes behind. I don't want to be found. I don't care if this haunts my biological family or if there is god or if I'm going to hell when I die or if my life is not mine to take.
Is a potential solution I didn't consider?
WalterBlackPC 5y ago
I want you to PM me. It is very important, please do it.
bestsparkyalive 5y ago
Guess what asshole. We’re all fucking dead inside. It’s part of life. Deal with it. You can do better than this. If you applied all the energy you do toward being depressed towards something else you might have some sources of pride to fall back on. If you don’t gym start now. If you’re fat then stop fucking eating. Got shitty skin then see a dermatologist and wait the 6 months it takes to get an appointment. Got a small dick well stay the fuck off porn and learn to play the cards you were dealt.
iknowthewhey 5y ago
There is only one solution:
go to the gym and lift. Make your entire life goal right now to bench press 200 pounds and squat 300 pounds.Once you get there then start considering your options.
grwyscxle 5y ago
bet. squatting 250lbs changed my mind and my life, I CAN DO ANYTHING!!
cbang65 5y ago
You've considered solutions in therapy and nedication but you refuse to use them. Why would you treat our advice any different?
legithumannotalien 5y ago
I don't know. I guess you are saying I'm committed to doing what's bad for me
isthisalreadyused 5y ago
Medication bro, you fucking need it.
CanaryCherryJewel 5y ago
Oh woe is me
OrzhovPalatine 5y ago
Can't help those who won't help themselves. You know the situations, none of us here can make you take the medicine. You came to the wrong place if you wanted a pity party
[deleted] 5y ago
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Project_Zero_Betas 5y ago
Troll post.
FereallyRed 5y ago
Why wait?
Sounds like you got it all figured out.
How you gonna do it?
throwawayred213 5y ago
Stop. You’re a fucking man and need to learn how to control your emotions. I went through this bullshit for the last 3 years and the way out is through some serious self reflection. I had thoughts of suicide and crippling anxiety everyday, but I didn’t begin recovering until I began reflecting on where these thoughts originated from. Things are better now.
These negative beliefs you have about yourself are causing the problem. You reinforce them daily by making posts like this seeking validation/comfort/pity for why you feel the way you do, which makes them stronger.
Sit down for an entire day with a sheet of paper and a pen, no phone or distractions. Write down the negative beliefs about yourself that comes to your mind and start figuring out the events and triggers that caused you to believe these things.
DM me if you want more help or resources, I’ve been where you’ve been and know how to begin climbing out.
adam798 5y ago
You problem is you've done nothing about it, constantly telling yourself you are a quitter you tell yourself you dont deserve better so thats what you get. YOU GET WHAT YOU PUT IN You put in nothing so you get nothing life isnt meant to be easy you have a choice to give up or keep going only you can be the source of your own happyness and feeling sorry for yourself and being depresses is only going to get you into a bigger hole, dont die a quitter
writewhereileftoff 5y ago
To be blissfull is the greatest courage. To be miserable is very cowardly. In fact to be miserable nothing is needed. Any coward can do it. Any fool can do it. Everybody is capable of being miserable, but to be blissfull great courage is needed - it is an uphill task "Osho"
You're a coward. All the while only you can make the choice to steer your life into a positive direction. Clearly you want things to change otherwise you wouldn't be posting here. Nobody here can help you as much as you can help yourself though. You know what to do. Stop being a coward and take control of your life. Start by going to the gym religiously.
When you talk negative shit like that your brain grows accustomed to these negative patterns meaning its easier to fall into them again. Same thing can be done with positive patterns.
Sink or swim. Never ever say your a quitter to yourself again sheezus you decide who you are and you decide who you want to be. So do it...decide.
goomerall3 5y ago
Black pill spotted
MisterRoid 5y ago
Start injecting testosterone. Problems solved.
Throwaway-242424 5y ago
Seriously, if you're OK with dying, why not just take superhuman doses of steroids and try out extreme sports? At least go out with a bang.
embracingtheredpill 5y ago
Why wait?