when I talk to older guys, I struggle to be on their level, like my insecurities and immaturity come out and they see me as inferior

They see you as inferior because you act like it and they pick up on it. Every senior guy respects me at my internship because I slow down my speech, I look directly at them, and maintain my frame with them, so to speak.

Just ask them what's going on, anything planned for the weekend, and add a witty comment here and there. Gets better with age.

Stop riding with the waves and push yourself more

Take on more responsibility (primarily for yourself).

Face more conflict.

Suffer a whole lot. Experience years of hardship and growth. There is no quick trick.

You could try to take a week off and plan a route to someplace far away to walk there and back (something like 8 hours total?).

I'm a dad to a 4 year old and I'm 22. That definitely made me grow up quick. I also play poker with a bunch of grown folk every week.

Learn from past mistakes, take a lesson from every person you meet, lower your ego, understand everyone has insecurities and there's nothing wrong with that, and most importantly take it upon yourself to be a better human everyday

Try your hardest at everything you do and you'll end up suffering at some point and then you'll learn from it. I've learned the most from the hardest times in my life. You don't learn anything when it comes easy

Decide on what you want and start working at it. Face obstacles, solve them. Or fail, and learn. Learn how the world really works. https://xkcd.com/896/ It will come with time. To hasten the process: 1) focus 2) reflect on what you are doing so you improve or not make the same mistakes 3) learn from others who have done what you want to do either directly eg a senior or mentor, or indirectly via books (but only books by real practitioners).

Do more shit that scares you

Train your mind. Make friends with mature people and practice what you learn from them. Also, being matured comes with experience, expose yourself to various things. All the best!

Take a hard look at your own shadow, the things about yourself that are not serving your growth and purpose. The things your ego hides from your consciousness. Whatever makes you afraid, confront. Admit it to yourself and stand your ground against it. There’s a reason why “do not fear” is the most repeated phrase in the New Testament. This concept has been reiterated in every culture, religion, philosophy and so many pieces of fiction it’s difficult to even list them all. Instead of listening to entertainment, comedy podcasts or music, look into Jocko Willink. Start with this episode and try to absorb the lessons being articulated. It’s a gift that would have been profoundly impactful to my younger self. You’re very lucky to be the age you are. So much life ahead of you brother. Go get it.

https://youtu.be/23dArPpXgCM

Gay bars

Kidding of course. refinement is something that comes with time. You can speed this process up by hanging around different people who act like you want to become. You can also read a lot about self-improvement.

Seek out a mentor who can help you.

Trust me they already see your insecurities before you open your mouth. Worse, if you pretend to act like you are on their level. Just breathe first, and try to relax.

Ask about their experiences and show genuine interest. When you ask a question, pause, listen closely, ask for actionable tips and say you will try do them. Get their contact info and ask if it would be cool to stay in contact, later (and I actually mean sooner) followup after you try to implement things. Ask more questions, do more things, report back.

Older guys like having a little bro, especially one that listens and does shit when he says he will. Before you know it, you will have grown up a little, time will have passed, and you will have a mentor (maybe even unknowingly to him, which is good). This mentor, if well connected, will introduce you to more people then rinse, repeat and overtime you will have amassed an influential network with people who like, know, and trust you. Now go out there, be awkward and ask questions.

The problem is already the beginning / your frame. It appears that you want to be seen IN THEIR FRAME that you have same value / are not inferior. This already makes you inferior from the get go.

Why do you feel the need to rush yourself to be on level with them? Keep working on yourself and push forward that shit will come