I'm a college junior and about a year or so ago I started lifting heavy. I live with 2 housemates now who I'd call social and good-looking, but they have dad bods and are proud to say it. I try to get them to hit the gym with me, but they say that chicks like dad bods better and from there we've been arguing what girls actually prefer.
So to the point. I asked a couple of my girlfriends what they prefer ( same guy, different fitness ) and they went with dadbods. I forget their reasoning but I thought it was kinda bs. Was it to show that they weren't shallow or what?
I dont get it.
Edit: Lot of great answers here fellas
TheStumblingWolf 6y ago
They don't know any better. Sometimes you say you prefer what's available to you because then you can lie to yourself and say you have a choice or you're happy with what you have.
Your experience is also why one should at observe people's actions and not their words. They may not know what they want but their actions will tell you for them.
360_no_scope_upvote 6y ago
Women have no idea what they want anyway, one day a guy with no muscles can make them tingle, then another day 6packchad is making them squirt on the kitchen floor
TheStumblingWolf 6y ago
I believe it has to do with their cycle. Main stream science believes they want alphas as one point for their genes, and then a beta guy for safety and resources. Not disagreeing, just elaborating.
zeussingh 6y ago
https://youtu.be/vOvwTWhVT24
There you go. Watch till the end. Which one do you wanna be
Pharmatt 6y ago
I love this guy. Cocky as fuck, but good looking enough to pull it off
chachaChad 6y ago
Good video. Wow.
Dadbods for security and fit bods for sex right now.
pridebrah 6y ago
Being in shape is always the best choice regardless. You're a better ONS candidate when you're single, and you're walking dread in an LTR.
chachaChad 6y ago
Good point.
RAiderNat88 6y ago
Stop asking guys about their bodies and do your own fucking thing. Remember it's not about what women say it's about their actions. LIFT.
ThickDickWarrior89 6y ago
Watch their actions, don’t listen to their feeble minds.
CutLiver 6y ago
Never ask a girl for advice on this kind of stuff. They'll lie to make you feel better about yourself. I guarantee they're all wishing they had a Channing Tatum boyfriend instead of their dadbod guys.
Pharmatt 6y ago
funny enough one of the chicks i asked was my housemates girlfriend. I knew what her answer was before i asked but i like fucking with the guy
mcr00sterdota 6y ago
You asked a girl for advice? You got what you asked for, a lie.
Pharmatt 6y ago
lmao guess so
pridebrah 6y ago
Don't listen to what they say, watch what they do.
They say they like dadbods, but the aesthetic guy will never be without pussy unless he's socially autistic( even then he may still get some).
Pharmatt 6y ago
thanks bro
lifeisweirdasfuck 6y ago
Girl-friends do not exist. Never ask advice to women on how to get women.
Also, if you are good looking and they are attractive, you should try getting out the friendzone (by being sexual, using push and pull, escalating etc.) and then you will see how they prefer an aesthetic physique instead of a dadbod lmao.
Follow their actions, not their words
redhawkes 2 6y ago
Sour grapes, as others already said.
jerogz 6y ago
My question is what do you want for yourself? If their successes make you question yourself then there’s a bit of insecurity I’m sensing in you.
I have been there before, when I lost all my weight, I was laid more frequently than when I didn’t.
If that’s what you want then go for it. Comparing yourself to others just breeds negative energy. Focus on yourself. See what happens. Dad bod for the long run and long term relationship or being healthy for the long run and a long term relationship with a person who is also aesthetically pleasing.
Pharmatt 6y ago
Insecurity is basically the reason i lift, but the whole topic started from me lightheartedly joking about their guts. Thanks for the advice
mmerijn 6y ago
If I recall, we tend to be "attracted", for a lack of a better term, to people of similar social status to our own (read as beauty and social skills in women and character / ability to produce aka creating value in men). Attracted in this case would not be the same way you are attracted to a super model, but more of a romantic attraction. This makes sense because a unattractive women will most likely not get a high value man so being romantically attracted to him will be detrimental (they would be just wasting their time).
bigtuna45 6y ago
A dad bod is easier to control and manipulate because they have fewer options, thus they prefer them long term. Short term they want the strong ripped guy.
mrrooftops 6y ago
This
[deleted] 6y ago
[deleted]
dthlist 6y ago
How much in pounds or kg is two plates?
PreOrgasmGroanLness 6y ago
No, it is and isn't at the same time.
If you are a man that is unconfident because you believe you need money and a car and expensive clothes to get girls and you haven't those things, then you get those things, you'll go to /r/TheRedPill and preach how money is the pathroad to success with girls.
If you are unconfident because you're skinny/skinny-fat/fat and you change it for the better, the 80% of the job attracting women will be the confidence you've gained through changing your looks, but it is not the looks themselves. But that guy will go on /r/TheRedPill and preach how looks are everything, when it is in fact confidence, it's just that the looks made him feel like he's allowed to feel confident and go get what he wants now. Obviously he also became aesthetic, as you've stated, but the guy would get women if he had the confidence. Many would reject him simply because he's below their looks standard, but there would be some (still pretty) that would give in to the confidence anyway.
I've got a friend who's simply fat (and tall), but damn me if he's not a confident fuck. One of the most confident people I know. And he pulls better than me.
I'm not disagreeing with you btw, just expanding and rephrasing a little.
primu5d 6y ago
I say, even if you do lift for women, keep doing it. Nothing feels better than lifting and it really gets you in the right mentality. I lift for strength and for myself, but the added endorphins are a huge bonus!
onemantwo 6y ago
Kind of reminds me of the guys I see when I drive through my city's campus. 99% of the guys I notice are either super skinny, overweight or just simply have a lack of style (clothing, haircut and etc). However today I was waiting at a stop light. Noticed this one Asian girl who happened to be accompanied by this Asian guy. The dude already had decent facial aesthetics but he also had 16 ~ 17 inch arms. Stood out from everybody else in the area and I am assuming that the hot ass Asian girl was his GF.
I don't really know where I am going with this but it only takes a bit of effort to really stand out from the crowd. I assume women who want a long-term don't want you to stand out in a crowd, thus telling you dadbods are good enough or that YOU are GOOD ENOUGH the way you are.
Pharmatt 6y ago
Good shit thanks bro
demoneyes905 6y ago
Even though this video is meant to be taken lightly, Dom explains the whole dad bod phenomenon perfectly:
https://youtu.be/iQlIPOTbuH8
TheWhiskeyTickler 6y ago
Came here to say this.
I love the part about not reading books lol. Really though, this is such a universal human behavior in more than just relationships. "I bet those grape are probably sour anyway"
smirk_addict 6y ago
You’re forgetting how insecure women are about their looks. Women want to be the attractive ones and most are well aware that looks are the only thing they have to offer. So they are threatened by a man who puts a lot of effort into his body. A handsome face isn’t something you work for. It’s just something you have. So that doesn’t bother them. It’s the same as a man feeling threatened by a woman that makes more money than him but not being bothered at all if she inherited the money. But anyway, most women don’t want to date a guy whose body is better than theirs. They would rather be the “hot” one.
123InigoMontoya123 6y ago
This is absolutely true. A girl I plated over the Summer jokingly (seriously) told me that I should get fatter, and that it was scary how my waist was the same size as hers.
I told her, "why don't you catch up instead," and it actually made her work harder in the gym. Additionally, she would send me home with all sorts of leftover food to "fatten me up." Win win.
Gawernator 6y ago
This is spot on. It's the same reason that suddenly dressing very well can actually induce dread
Pharmatt 6y ago
yeah i think one of them said your last line almost verbatim. Thanks for the reply
atlastic1 6y ago
1: You expected an honest answer from women related to sexual strategy - first mistake
2: You expected them to know what they want accurately - second mistake
3: Dadbod = low value = little to no effort required to maintain relationship, and easier to manipulate due to lack of options.
[deleted] 6y ago
Your friends are hamstering not lifting because they are betas. Drop these men and make friends with body builders.
A woman's response to her preferences in men stems from her ego in an attempt to weed out those weak enough to actually listen to a woman for advice. This is an innate biological defense mechanism used on men to protect her from being impregnated by betas. See shit test. (Please also read the sidebar) Her response does not reflect her innate biologically hardwired prefernce of an alpha chad.
AnjaJutta 6y ago
Oops, you accidentally named hamstering lazy people "men".
plymouthSundance 6y ago
Just because they don’t lift, does mean they are “beta”. Leo Dicaprio doesn’t lift and slays more poon than you do.
jerogz 6y ago
Bruh, not everyone has DiCaprio money and finances.
IncelNoMore 6y ago
I know three guys who don't lift becausz they're already very sure of themselves. Two of them are facially attractive, the third one isn't, but all three of them have layed 100 to 200 women.
Nomfwic 6y ago
First. Don't ask women for advice.
Second. They are saving face.
Dad bod wil get you chicks , but the ones who see you as provider.
Aesthetic will get you more pussy.
Fact
TehJimmyy 6y ago
amen . Most suitable answer here it answers OP question and not how women think "some times" .
Drakonlord 6y ago
dad bods = long term partner
aesthetic = 1 night partner
Ou-tis 6y ago
First mistake: don't ask women because they tell you not the truth but what they perceive to be the right thing -social accepted- to tell you. Instead observe what they do: Women go crazy at cinema for dadbods men or 50 shades/magic mike/that wild acquaman?
Second mistake: don't argue with people on going to the gym,because they will defend their slack lifestyle to protect their ego.It's a matter of ego,not logic. Smile at them and do your business,maybe they will ask you something about gym,maybe not but who cares?
Pharmatt 6y ago
Good point on the second paragraph. I guess i was taking a shot at their ego in front of girls thus being defensive
blackedoutfast 6y ago
pay attention to women's actions, not their words.
one of the important things to understand about TRP (and people in general) is that a lot of this is targeting the subconscious, instinctive, animal-like part of a woman's brain. the logical, conscious part controls the words coming out of her mouth, but that voice is really just a passenger. it's the silent, subconscious mind that is really making all of the decisions.
this supposed preference for dadbods comes entirely from that logical, conscious part of the female brain. they've been used and pumped'n'dumped by hot guys with aesthetic bodies. they associate nice muscles and low body fat with player fuckboys and a dadbod body type with betas.
but here's the important part: the subconscious, animal-like part of them wants the hot guys. it doesn't matter what they say, they want to get fucked by fuckboy players. take them out in the real world and put them in a room with a hot fuckboy and a dadbod beta, and she's going to choose the hot fuckboy every time.
and then after the hot fuckboy pumps'n'dumps her, the logical conscious part of the brain is going to come up with a rationalization for her actions and an explanation for what happened. due to cognitive dissonance, the conscious part of the brain will never admit that it's just a loud but powerless backseat driver and the silent subconscious is completely in charge, and she will blame the hot fuckboy for tricking her. she will say that she hates hot guys and prefers those nice dadbod betas, and will swear that next time she has the choice she will choose the dadbod beta. but it's not true, those are just word. put her in that situation again and she will do the exact same thing as she did before.
king_of_red_alphas 6y ago
This reminds me of the study where it men and women were shown different videos of sexual situations.
They would write down their opinions on whether they “liked” it or not as they were shown the videos.
However, their genitals were also being monitored for blood flow / arousal.
With men, it was basically 1:1. What they said they liked, their dicks agreed.
With women, they found that they often would consciously claim that they were not aroused by certain scenarios when the monitoring equipment clearly indicated that they were.
Think about that.
Edit - found study
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2739403/#!po=14.5963
Pharmatt 6y ago
holy shit definitely worth reading. thanks
BusterVadge 6y ago
Pay attention to her actions, not her words. Is she salivating over the rock or seth rogen? Think about it.
RP_Br3 6y ago
If you are higher smv you might be out of her league. So if she's with such a guy she is either forced to improve herself, and which girl wants to work hard, or she might lose you, and which girl wants to do that?
2comment 6y ago
Why do the super majority Miss USA Contestants say they wish for world peace or some variation yet none of talk about getting rich and famous and living in luxury? If that is their dream, why are they on stage chasing the rich and famous fantasy?
"The truth is generally seen, rarely heard." -Baltasar Gracian
If you wanted the truth, you would have approached it indirectly. Get two pictures of two very similiar looking guys, similiar ages, hair styles, poses, ethnicities, and outfits/colors (to reduce all other variables) but with the difference being ones a dad bod and other is fit. Don't say what your experiment is about or just lie (I want to see if the men's sexual orientation/religious/political leanings affect how others perceive them or some bullshit), and ask them to choose one or the other.
Pharmatt 6y ago
That Miss USA example is gold. Thanks
GeuseyBetel 6y ago
First of all, never ask a fish for fishing advice.
Secondly, women prefer both in different contexts.
Women are incredibly insecure and don't want a ripped guy in an LTR who challenges their own looks.
For STRs they prefer the ripped guy hands down.
Ultimately, it's just a matter of AF/BB.
vic_rattle18 6y ago
As funny as it sounds, Dom from broscience on YouTube has a great video on this called "why the dad of is worse than Ebola." It's a funny video, but it's actually spot on and filled with redpills
nofilmynofucky 6y ago
Don't listen to what women say they want: they will only tell you what they believe they should say in the moment.
Watch a woman's actions, her words are not a true reflection of her reality.
poochman 6y ago
Don't listen to what girls say, watch what they do. Read the damn sidebar.
raxical 6y ago
Oh yeah, they're totally right man. Magic Mike was a dad bod, in fact most male strippers are actually dad bods. If you look at men that are used to market to women, they're all dad bods. Hell, even romance novels, dad bods.
They've got it figure out dude. You should really put down the weights and pick up a pizza.
Who cares what your friends say. Look at the world around you man! Do what you know is right.
Pharmatt 6y ago
Time to quit lifting and start respecting women!