Hello r/asktrp

Two weeks ago my former Oneits/ex-gf showed up at my previous place of employment and left a letter, containing her number and a short message stating that she would like to see me again, with my ex-coworker (haven't seen her in 5 years)

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About 7 to 8 months ago i discovered TRP. All the knowledge provided finally gave me the last push to move on. Trust me when i say things were really bad when she broke up with me. I had been in a long and slow downwards spiral long before i met her (we actually met when i was 14 she 13 but we didn't see each other till 6 1/2 years later).

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When i saw her name on the letter my former BP-Self turned around in his coffin. I did not expect to hear from her ever again. I took two days to contemplate and agreed to see her. The meeting is scheduled for this Saturday.

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I have no idea what her intentions are, for all i know she might be dying and wants to bang. She said she needed time alone when she was diagnosed with cervical cancer and ofc i agreed and gave her space. in hindsight thru the red lense i should have been her rock.

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I have the urge to tell her that i am sorry for being such a little bitch back then. That i have grown as a person and a man and when looking back all i can do is shake my head in disbelief (i won't go into more detail but trust me at times i was a super betabitch).

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I came to the conclusion that as long as i go into this with rock solid outcome independence and don't catch any feelings i should be fine. I mean If the deer shoots itself

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I guess my question is: Do i shoot myself in the foot if i show shame and apologize for my behaviour? Any suggestions on how to approach this?