So my gf isn't the biggest fan of giving bj's. How do I get her to give them more often during foreplay with out seeming butt hurt about it? My first thought was to just stop with fore play and sex the next time she denies me but I'm worried that will seem butt hurt. This girl is also an ltr. For the record I'm not wanting a bj to finish because it takes to long and I'm not a huge fan of bj's to finish. Just want a little dick sucking before penetration.
- Main Forums
- What's Hot
- TRP.RED
- Tribe Forums
- TheRedPill
- Tribe Management
- Create New Tribe
- Manage My Tribes
- Find New Tribes
- Recent News
-
-
the-bum-hammer 8y ago
She would be if you were the "prize" to her.
So, you made a girl who doesn't give blowjobs that often a girlfriend?
"Blowjobs aren't everything..." But they are, aren't they? Your woman wanting to give you pleasure? Why one would stick with a girl, long term, who doesn't want to please her man is beyond me.
Said by a young guy whose never had a good one.
Your girl doesn't even want to suck your dick for 5 minutes. Kind of says it all.
Metalgear222 8y ago
Best comment here
arrayay 8y ago
It framed the situation well, but have the guy no actionable advice.
Kommanderdude 8y ago
Honestly I think he's all talk and gets very little action in real life. You know one of those internet know it alls with a 12 inch dick a million in the bank and bangs 20 bitches a week. I like how he gives zero advice and assumes that I've never had a good bj since I'm not a fan of having them to finish. I get off more on dominating a woman in bed than sitting there being sucked off for 5 to 10 minutes. I like the way they feel but they are and will always be better as a part of foreplay than a stand alone sexual act.
dRePe_Thill 8y ago
"Honestly I think he's all talk and gets very little action in real life. You know one of those internet know it alls with a 12 inch dick a million in the bank and bangs 20 bitches a week."
This is just a buffer to dampen the reality that you fucked up your frame(being the prize) with your LTR. He doesn't provide much advice because we deal with this before an LTR begins.
The approach to go about this is to assess what you know and what you want. You know that your gf isn't giving you head during foreplay and denies it(most times) yet you guys still continue the foreplay then have sex. What you have done is positively reinforced her denying you a bj because you both end up fucking.
What I would do is during the foreplay, tell her to blow you then when she denies you, you just roll over and go to bed. Now you actually need to hold frame here, and emotionlessly convey you are tired then pass out.
You have covertly(very good thing as women are covert thinkers) communicated that you are denying her denial of bjs and that you don't need just sex(abundance attitude).
Then watch the hamster spin
BlueBlus 8y ago
He gave advice.
indianblanket 8y ago
Wash yourself.
hello_ther 8y ago
You should reciprocate with oral on her if you don't already. Selfishness in bed isn't sexy.
Kommanderdude 8y ago
Already do. She was shocked I made her cum from oral. She said it's always been difficult for people to get her off. My tongue skills are the thing I get complimented on the most by plates.
hello_ther 8y ago
Maybe she just doesn't like giving head. There are a million other things you can do in bed. Get creative.
mattizie 8y ago
Just stop and do something else. My go to is gym.
If she asks why you're leaving just tell her the truth, you're bored right now, she is boring right now.
Be sure to give her a hug and kiss good bye, and squeeze her arsea bit, before you leave and be smiling.
Most likely she'll surprise you next time.
Good luck.
TehJimmyy 8y ago
and if she doesnt find another girl who will.
max_peenor 8y ago
If she is into you, she'll do all sorts of shit to make sure you aren't bored. If she isn't into you, she'll realize she is bored too and go for a swing, leaving you to slay new cats. Either way, you win. Playing the boring angle has done nothing but wonders for me.
zattraction 8y ago
Why the comforting bit before leaving?
That_Deaf_Guy 8y ago
vandaalen 8y ago
Dread game.
kruxofthemimed 8y ago
so much this. She will either A.) leave you in response which, if she does, good. or B.) work harder to please you so that you stay, i.e bjs.
also, be more attractive. eat more whole food plants like legumes, whole grains, and dark leafy vegetables, stop eating oily/salty/sugary shit and get your ass lifting
you can't negotiate attraction but you can make yourself appear more attractive. it's up to you.
Kommanderdude 8y ago
Idk how I can be more attractive I'm already an in shape jacked powerlifter.
RocketManV 8y ago
Get a less attractive gf.
Kalidane 8y ago
Attraction includes physique, it doesn't equal physique.
kruxofthemimed 8y ago
well something is causing her to not want to give you head. does your dick smell like shit? make sure you clean your ass after every time you take a dump, not just smear your excrement all over your butthole with dry toilet paper. clean with water every time you poop. other than that, you should use dread. if your girl doesn't like giving head you can find a girl who does, but I find it unlikely that she straight up doesn't like giving head- for some reason right now, she may just not like giving it to you. don't feel hurt by that though at all haha attraction is a fickle thing and we all have areas we can improve in it. good luck dude.
Kommanderdude 8y ago
She says precum makes her gag. The work around we've found thus far is to put strawberry flavored lube on my dick before she sucks it.
kruxofthemimed 8y ago
what do you eat? if you have a bad diet youe precum will taste like shit. get rid of oils, meat, dairy, and eggs. add in way more vegetables, fruits, whole grains, and legumes
Kommanderdude 8y ago
Lean meat, veggies, rice and other healthy foods.
[deleted] 8y ago
Find a side piece that will suck your dick down like a milkshake.
[deleted] 8y ago
honestly i would just tell her that you want your dick sucked more often and if she doesn't do it you should break up with her and go find a woman that meets your needs.
Life is too short to not have it your way. Sex in a LTR is about maximizing connection and pleasing the other partner. Find someone who believes this.
RedOkra 8y ago
That last bit sounded a bit blue.
[deleted] 8y ago
Disagree. Both partners in an LTR should want to please the other sexually. A lot of pleasure for women comes from connection, especially in an LTR setting. Partners should also be able to express their wants and needs sexually and have them met, if reasonable.
If you're good at sex and getting it often, you would know all of this.
[deleted] 8y ago
[deleted]
GunsGermsAndSteel 8y ago
Why on the side? It's not like he's married with kids. He can just drop her and find someone else.
Kommanderdude 8y ago
I don't think it's an attraction thing. I decided to do some investigative work to see if I could tell how she acted with ex bf's she uses to hook up with between relationships. ( thank you apple for iMessage lol). Basically I found texts from a few month to a year before we met between her and two different ex's trying to arrange hook ups. She pretty much shut them down every time they brought up bj's while sexting.
It just reaffirms my position that it's not an attraction thing, but that she's ( that girl) who thinks she shouldn't or doesn't have to do them. I blame the first bf she had for not training her right. Now I have to teach an old dog now tricks.... or just next. Every other girl I've been with just automatically does it.
the-bum-hammer 8y ago
She's probably used to every guy being her bitch. Women don't (have to) give blowjobs to bitches.
max_peenor 8y ago
She has not submitted you yet and is holding back on doing so. This is very normal for women to do, particularly younger women. It is an extension of the ASD. The question is if you want her to submit or not; frankly, there have been many women I didn't want to take there, because I simply wanted them for their wet hole, pleasing aesthetics and occasional playfulness.
When and if she submits, she will suck.
zattraction 8y ago
That must be tough reading your ltr's sexts to someone else?
Kommanderdude 8y ago
Not really no. The one guy is always ready to risk ruining his relationships( currently marriage) to sleep with her. It's pretty pathetic honestly. She pretty much ghosted on him after we met. Dude did all sorts of stuff for her around her house just to try and get some action. She's not even the best looking or the greatest lay. It's funny how he acts like she's some kind of treasure. I only ltr'd her because of how compatible we are in every other aspect of life and how well we get along. Married friends have described us as getting along better than people married 20+ years. Figured I'd go a different route and not make this one all about the sex. Although short bj's a little more often would be nice.
Late30sMasculist 8y ago
This makes sense. Can you get a side piece?
BusterVadge 8y ago
I bet she would give chad a bj without complaining. Be more like chad... Dread game is your friend.
RedOkra 8y ago
Probably would be eager to learn when and how to do it without him asking.
Kalidane 8y ago
Why should she do more than she needs to?
Girls are lazy as fuck. If she doesn't need to do something to keep you around, she won't.
idgaf- 8y ago
Just guide her head down; there is no verbal trick.
ThatKassiusGuy 8y ago
I honestly don't think you're going to get anywhere, anytime soon.
However, if you're continuing to improve yourself, lifting, hobbies, blah blah blah, usual sidebar bullshit, maybe she'll suck you off more often. Or maybe she'll go suck some other guys dick instead because you clearly aren't ready for an LTR, or ready enough to introduce a TRP lifestyle into your LTR.
It's all about framing dude and it's clear you haven't set yourself up in the right light with this girl for her to blow you.
Just my thoughts matey.
FrameWalker 8y ago
Two ideas based on sex god method.
Use your judgement on this one. Go the ultra dominant route where you pick her up put her on her knees and go to completion. Let yourself build up the week before. Focus only on your pleasure. BJ ONLY. Many girls like being taken, and this may really turn her on.
radioactivities9 8y ago
do u shave?
Kommanderdude 8y ago
No. She prefers me unshaven down there. But I do keep it short. Something about she doesn't like the feel of my shaven pelvis area rubbing her clit in missionary.
jasondougies 8y ago
do you eat her?
[deleted] 8y ago
[deleted]
RedOkra 8y ago
Maybe I'm idealistic but I imagine I could keep a LTR sexually interested enough in me to actually just want to do that only because she enjoys my dick and pleasing me.
Peter_B_Long 8y ago
My gf was the same way before trp. In fact, I wasn't even trying to specifically increase blowjobs when I learned of trp and began to apply dread game, which led to me being surprised when she told me after a few months how much she liked giving me blowjobs.
Things you want to do is 1. Apply dread game of course 2. Compliment her when she gives you a blowjob. My gf makes me cum pretty quick from a blowjob, and sometimes if I cum way too fast, I'll just joke around and tell her, "damn look how good you are, you made me cum too fast". 3. Bring it up every once in a while outside the bedroom. When you guys are sexting or sending pics, maybe you can send her a dick pic and be like "I wish your lips were around my dick right now (;" or some shit like that.
but the most important part is that you want her to want to please you. That should be the goal. If you guilt her into it, it's not going to last and the blowjobs are going to suck (not in a good way). One way to do this is to please her in bad. Fuck the shit out of her. Fuck her so good that she thinks that no other guy could fuck her better than you. when you please her, she'll want to please you.
Oh and last tip. Sometimes I don't want my gf to give me a blowjob (because I want to last longer during sex) so when she goes down on me, I'll just tell her no and start fucking her. Because I told her no, now she wants what she can't have, and maybe after you get hard again, she'll give you an unconditional blowjob.
Or you can just find someone else. Good luck.
Atticus_Crowley 8y ago
I mean, rest of the comments here can be onto something. Or maybe, head just isn't something she enjoys and you're gonna have to decide if that's something your willing to deal with.
No bj's (or having to pull teeth to get one/receiving only unenthusiastic ones") is a totally acceptable deal breaker. I know plenty of women who won't consider a dude who is opposed to going down to chow town, and considering just how much of sex is us men doing all the work, having something where you can lay back and relax and have the pleasure be focused entirely on you for once should be expected.
Can try introducing 69 into your foreplay. Or start having a more dominant/rough sex style, and just grab her by the hair and force her onto her knees/while fucking her missionary, stop and move up to her chest and make her suck you a bit before going back into her pussy. Stuff like that.
RedOkra 8y ago
I've had several girls tell me they always hated giving head and somehow they magically became eager cock suckers for me. Just not their less attractive ex-boyfriends.